"Mom Brain" poll

[simpsongal]

Not then, no. But I feel like I've experienced a decline since I hit my 40s...

I'm still very sharp and able to juggle a lot but I forget what I was thinking all.the.time. Chicken or the eggs wise, I'm juggle a lot more and there's just more to know after 15+ years of practicing law and 10 years of being a mom. So maybe it's overload....

[felicity]

I've definitely experienced mental decline. I agree it's mental overload, but also likely age since I'm in my early 40s.

It's so frustrating. Like, last night I couldn't remember what I normally say to DS at bedtime. We have a whole routine that is the same every night where we blow kisses and say certain things, and I just flat out forgot my parts. He couldn't remember what I say either and was super bummed. I still can't remember and it's driving me crazy.

I also say the wrong words sometimes, but I don't always realize I'm doing it. DH corrects me sometimes and I'm embarrassed knowing that I probably do it all the time around other people and they just don't tell me.

I hate that this kind of thing probably affects how middle aged women are looked at and treated by society. I'm still smart and valuable even though I don't remember words!

[Aloe Vera]

My 16 month old is still not a great sleeper so maybe it affects things but my memory is affected and I forget words all the time. This is so frustrating because when I need to tell something to my H for example, I can't find my words and it's something easy like "door" or "drawer". I am still breastfeeding so hormones could also be responsible for this. I am 41 too so who knows. I have been pregnant and/or breastfeeding since I was 37.

[blondemoment123]

💯

[arehopsveggies]

My kids are 8 and 5. I swear all my brain cells turned to milk when I nursed them. BUT they are crap sleepers so that doesn’t help

I am in grad school now I and sometimes I feel old and stupid.

[bee20]

I assure you those of us without children also sleep worse, have hormone induced brain fog (thanks perimenopause!), don't have the same body shape or hair color, and on and on. Alas aging comes for us all.

[stemmie]

I was approaching perimenopause when I had DS. I did have some PPA/PPD and serious sleep deprivation for the first 9months and was in a daze. It improved once DS reliably slept through the night and became easier in general but I suspect some peri-brain had settled in. The new mom fog seemed to be related to things for which I was responsible or had talked about with DH and may have slept through-- kind of like ADHD. It improved a lot when I was able to stop my SSRI. The peri-brain was more about weird stuff like recalling words and things I was supposed to do.

I'm back to caregiving for my mom now and sometimes feel like the "mom-fog/ADHD" is back but not like it was. LOL, so far mom hasn't developed colic. I'm also back on AD-- an NDRI this time which may be the difference.

[wanderingback]

Jan 12, 2024 23:36:29 GMT -5 bee20 said:

I assure you those of us without children also sleep worse, have hormone induced brain fog (thanks perimenopause!), don't have the same body shape or hair color, and on and on. Alas aging comes for us all.

I don’t think it’s just age that people are discussing. There are definitely physiologic changes that happen that are specific to pregnancy that happen even if you are pregnant when you’re 20. I definitely know I wouldn’t have diastasis recti if I were never pregnant for example.

[fortnightlily]

Jan 15, 2024 22:54:42 GMT -5 wanderingback said:

Jan 12, 2024 23:36:29 GMT -5 bee20 said:

I assure you those of us without children also sleep worse, have hormone induced brain fog (thanks perimenopause!), don't have the same body shape or hair color, and on and on. Alas aging comes for us all.

I don’t think it’s just age that people are discussing. There are definitely physiologic changes that happen that are specific to pregnancy that happen even if you are pregnant when you’re 20. I definitely know I wouldn’t have diastasis recti if I were never pregnant for example.

Ah yes, I have diastasis recti too and chickened out of doing a tummy tuck with muscle repair this year. Maybe in the future

In bee20's defense, I mean yes, I'm sure there are blurred lines between what I feel about my cognitive state today that's attributable to age vs parenthood. And what's literally the physiological result of pregnancy to the brain, vs the mental/psychological load of raising a child. But the way I try to tease some of that out, I guess, is by these sorts of polls and seeing if others feel that parenthood was a distinct inflection point with a before/after sense of their capabilities, as I do. 

I felt like I aged 10 years the moment my son was born. Physically, because I had aching joints until I stopped breastfeeding (thanks, relaxin!). Mentally, because sleep deprivation and also I had postpartum anxiety, and anxiety is exhausting in its own way. But the past decade has been a b*tch. Raising a young kid, the doom-spiral political climate, the pandemic. And now I arrive in my early-40s and just wonder if I'm ever going to feel like my old self ever again. 

[wanderingback]

Jan 16, 2024 10:23:20 GMT -5 fortnightlily said:

Jan 15, 2024 22:54:42 GMT -5 wanderingback said:

I don’t think it’s just age that people are discussing. There are definitely physiologic changes that happen that are specific to pregnancy that happen even if you are pregnant when you’re 20. I definitely know I wouldn’t have diastasis recti if I were never pregnant for example.

Ah yes, I have diastasis recti too and chickened out of doing a tummy tuck with muscle repair this year. Maybe in the future

In bee20's defense, I mean yes, I'm sure there are blurred lines between what I feel about my cognitive state today that's attributable to age vs parenthood. And what's literally the physiological result of pregnancy to the brain, vs the mental/psychological load of raising a child. But the way I try to tease some of that out, I guess, is by these sorts of polls and seeing if others feel that parenthood was a distinct inflection point with a before/after sense of their capabilities, as I do. 

I felt like I aged 10 years the moment my son was born. Physically, because I had aching joints until I stopped breastfeeding (thanks, relaxin!). Mentally, because sleep deprivation and also I had postpartum anxiety, and anxiety is exhausting in its own way. But the past decade has been a b*tch. Raising a young kid, the doom-spiral political climate, the pandemic. And now I arrive in my early-40s and just wonder if I'm ever going to feel like my old self ever again. 

I think it needs to be talked about more the affects that pregnancy has on the body. I was reading something that someone wrote and they said "wow pregnancy isn’t all puppies and rainbows like people make it seem." So yeah I think it’s good for all of us to recognize that pregnancy can do certain things to your body and aging can do certain things to your body. Of course there can be some overlap but if you get pregnant at 20 there are still changes that happen to your body which obviously aren’t due to age.

Also, reminds me, where is the nastiness of pregnancy thread?!

[sent]

I don't think I've had cognitive decline. I also suffer from the "too many things in my brain." This combined with "not enough quiet time to tackle hard things" has made me question life in general. It takes me years to do something that used to take just a few weeks and that has been so frustrating.