Thursday randoms

[TR]

Nov 21, 2024 14:57:04 GMT -5 expectantsteelerfan said:

Nov 21, 2024 13:30:42 GMT -5 TR said:

Knowing this person, I’m sure she was talking about things in a fairly graphic way. And she was already on warning for inappropriate comments and cursing. And the company is a well-known family-owned Texas company, so probably a bit more buttoned-up culture than some other companies in the first place.

I'm curious, do you think a man would be written up for making similar type comments?  For swearing and talking about having sweaty balls or something? 

My only work experience is as a teacher, where I heard all kinds of things in the lunch room, although I guess most of the worst of it was repeating stuff the students said or worse, the parents said.  But I can't imagine an employee being fired for just talking about their life to their co-workers.  I mean, talking to clients inappropriately, yes, or being racist/sexist/-phobic, yes, but just oversharing?  It's wild to me.

I feel like if a man were saying this in front of women in an office it would be worse.

[TR]

Susie - I’d send them that offer along with a link to a nearby hotel in case they’d prefer that.

[expectantsteelerfan]

Nov 21, 2024 20:07:06 GMT -5 TR said:

Nov 21, 2024 14:57:04 GMT -5 expectantsteelerfan said:

I'm curious, do you think a man would be written up for making similar type comments?  For swearing and talking about having sweaty balls or something? 

My only work experience is as a teacher, where I heard all kinds of things in the lunch room, although I guess most of the worst of it was repeating stuff the students said or worse, the parents said.  But I can't imagine an employee being fired for just talking about their life to their co-workers.  I mean, talking to clients inappropriately, yes, or being racist/sexist/-phobic, yes, but just oversharing?  It's wild to me.

I feel like if a man were saying this in front of women in an office it would be worse.

I was trying to think of what the equivalent would be to Brazilian wax, and this was the best I could come up with.  As I said, my experience for 'normal workplace conversation' is non-existent.  My 1st year in the workforce, I had to call a parent, with my administrator in the room, and explain to a parent that their child drew a picture of 'the shocker' on his test paper and wrote 'shocker, shocker, SHOCK HER' on it, and then explain to him what 'the shocker' was and why that resulted in his child getting a detention from me.  So yeah, then I went to lunch and told the rest of my coworkers about this.  Because teenagers.  
So while in theory I get that there are situations and times/places where these conversations are totally inappropriate, I can also imagine times/places at work where you have relationships with co-workers where these conversations are also appropriate and everyday occurrences and not something to get fired over. 

So really, I was just hoping her firing was not something sexist and that your workplace would hold men to the same standards since you mentioned it was Texas and conservative.   

[expectantsteelerfan]

Also followyourarrow early congrats and hope everything goes well and thinking of you!

[TR]

Nov 21, 2024 20:16:05 GMT -5 expectantsteelerfan said:

Nov 21, 2024 20:07:06 GMT -5 TR said:

I feel like if a man were saying this in front of women in an office it would be worse.

I was trying to think of what the equivalent would be to Brazilian wax, and this was the best I could come up with.  As I said, my experience for 'normal workplace conversation' is non-existent.  My 1st year in the workforce, I had to call a parent, with my administrator in the room, and explain to a parent that their child drew a picture of 'the shocker' on his test paper and wrote 'shocker, shocker, SHOCK HER' on it, and then explain to him what 'the shocker' was and why that resulted in his child getting a detention from me.  So yeah, then I went to lunch and told the rest of my coworkers about this.  Because teenagers.  
So while in theory I get that there are situations and times/places where these conversations are totally inappropriate, I can also imagine times/places at work where you have relationships with co-workers where these conversations are also appropriate and everyday occurrences and not something to get fired over. 

So really, I was just hoping her firing was not something sexist and that your workplace would hold men to the same standards since you mentioned it was Texas and conservative.   

I think that’s a really different situation. You weren’t sharing how your husband used the shocker on you while you were on vacation or anything. (is that even how you say it? Used it on you? Did it to you? That’s how little I know lol) I think talking, even obliquely, about your own genitals with coworkers with whom you are not friends outside of work is inappropriate.

Anyway. These are also women she’s worked with less than a year. One of the conversations was within the first three months.

[circa1978]

Weirdly, I've also had a workplace conversation about "the shocker" because it was the real honest-to-god name of a University mascot.

[beerlover]

Nov 21, 2024 17:27:03 GMT -5 wanderlustmom said:

Nov 21, 2024 15:48:42 GMT -5 beerlover said:

Well $300 later we're all caught up on appointments, vaccines, nail trims, and flea meds. Eek. The vet didn't seem to have too many ideas on how to keep these cats from murdering each other though. I guess I should invest in some of these stupid diffusers.

uggh, I know veterinarian services are so expensive. My neighbor had cat fight issues and the diffuser did its job and one of her cats takes an antidepressant.  She said for her individual situation both were needed.  She did say cat prozac was surprisingly not expensive and peace is restored 

I was kind of surprised he didn't mention this as an option when I said my older cat won't even come downstairs anymore because she's so scared of the new cat. I will try the diffusers first and then ask about Prozac if that doesn't work.

I just don't want to spend any more money on this

[sadlebred]

Susie I think that's a brilliant plan actually! Surely they can pay for a hotel if they want to be more comfortable.

I was supposed to go out of town just for the night in a couple of days, but I have to cancel. I'm really bummed. There isn't enough room for everyone...so someone had to get displaced.

[Susie]

Nov 21, 2024 20:01:00 GMT -5 momin2013 said:

Susie , 5 nights?! That’s bonkers - the only time I’ve had a houseguest stay more than a couple of nights was when my in-laws travelled to visit FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD. I’d absolutely proceed with the air mattress plan and yes I would give them a heads up in advance so they know what to expect (and hopefully, clue in that that’s way too long of a visit and revise their plan).

Yeah, it's a lot!  Arriving Wed, staying overnight Wed-Thurs-Fri-Sat nights of TG weekend, and leaving Sun. I cannot comprehend just "announcing" that I am arriving somewhere for 5 freaking days, not just me, but also my toddler, my spouse, my dog... I've also never stayed at his house more than maybe 2 nights I think.  Even when we went to help them when they first bought it, and we were there to paint!

My brother has previously commented that he doesn't care where they sleep, so I'm taking him at his word.  I feel slightly bad for my SIL, because *she* hasn't exactly said that, but I'm just out of bandwidth with everything going on.  They live a ~4 hour drive away, so if they decide they aren't sleeping well / aren't comfortable, my feelings will not be hurt if they decide on Sat that they're ready to head home.  There's no flights to change or anything like that.  If they leave a day early that would give me Sun to prep for the coming week and decorate for Christmas, so I can have that done, laundry caught up, etc. going into the week, especially since I have to leave the next Sat for my week caring for dad.  If they don't leave, I'll basically be doing the same set of things while they are here. 

I talked to my bro last night, and he was quizzing me on what toddler gear we had on hand (my youngest is 5 and we gave away a lot of it immediately as he aged out).  Toddler size booster chair yes, PNP no, monitor no, sippy cups no, etc.  He didn't ask about rooms, so I figure I addressed the priorities!