? for my fellow recovering folks

[lexxasaurus]

So. I've done some AA, had a sponsor for a bit and worked some steps. I do go to meetings occasionally still.

But have any of you done any other type of programs? Any forums or groups that you'd recommend? I'm never going to be not standoffish about the God part of AA, but I find it to have valuable lessons and I've met great friends there.. I would just like other options too!

[flex]

I have no suggestions. lol

I've worked all the steps, have had the same sponsor for a number of years, etc., etc. But my hat's off to you if you can find some good solid options that work for you. (((hugs)))

[arch01]

lexxasaurus-you sound like my husband. He's having a hard time about the God part. A friend pointed him to an AA for Atheists-have you looked into that?

[lexxasaurus]

Omg. The board ate my post twice.

Thanks arch01 for the rec, I'll check it out.

I think more than anything I feel like my recovering friends are horrified to know I'm not diligently working the program and I feel like I'm supposed to have something to be able to be recovering. Yet I'm broken and I feel MORE aware of the want to drink when I submerge myself with AA. So. It's great to have there for me, but it isn't what was keeping me sober or anything...

I'm probably rambling, but thanks for letting me talk! Ha.

[lexxasaurus]

I did individual therapy, adjusted medication to deal with some of the problems I was covering up with alcohol, and I did work a few steps with my sponsor. I loved her, but I moved to a new city and it didn't work well to meet up any more.

It felt so stressful to try to fit it in when I got so busy. And then I kept hearing "you had time to drink, you have time for meetings". Sure, I had time to drink because I was barely seeing my partner, I'd stopped talking to my siblings, I wasn't leaving the house. Now I'm working two jobs, making a point to go out with siblings and friends, etc. I feel like I've gotten my life back.
I know it's possible it will all blow up in my face one day but I feel good about where I am now.

[flex]

There are tons and tons of online meetings, and they aren't all AA or NA. Many are "recovery" meetings. I suggest Googling. : )

[lexxasaurus]

I looked at the Agnostic AA meetings and there's one in my town I'll check out. Also taking your advice flex and googling since in the past I've just browsed a bit.

[flex]

And if you come across an "icky" online meeting, just move on to another one. Easy peasy.

[MixedBerryJam]

The first few years I belonged to an online and in-person group called Women For Sobriety. I found it rather more empowering for me, personally, than AA, but I really only had/have a year or so's worth of experience with AA and can't really speak eloquently about the differences. In the early days (my early days, I mean) anyone could read the website and you had to be a member to post, but now it seems that you have to sign up online even to see the boards. If you want to have a look you can see it at womenforsobriety.org. That said, it's not nearly as universal a program, and you likely won't find a lot of actualy meetings near you. If you are more of a face-to-face person, this is no AA. I had to drive about 50 miles each way for my weekly meeting, but it was time well spent. I'm still in touch with some of the women I met there, although I no longer do the meetings.

Their 13 tenets are
1. I have a life-threatening problem that once had me. I now take charge of my life and my disease. I accept the responsibility.
2. Negative thoughts destroy only myself. My first conscious sober act must be to remove negativity from my life.
3. Happiness is a habit I will develop. Happiness is created, not waited for.
4. Problems bother me only to the degree I permit them to. I now better understand my problems and do not permit problems to overwhelm me.
5. I am what I think. I am a capable, competent, caring, compassionate woman.
6. Life can be ordinary or it can be great. Greatness is mine by a conscious effort.
7. Love can change the course of my world. Caring becomes all important.
8. The fundamental object of life is emotional and spiritual growth.
Daily I put my life into a proper order, knowing which are the priorities.
9. The past is gone forever. No longer will I be victimized by the past. I am a new person.
10. All love given returns. I will learn to know that others love me.
11. Enthusiasm is my daily exercise. I treasure all moments of my new life.
12. I am a competent woman and have much to give life. This is what I am and I shall know it always.
13. I am responsible for myself and for my actions. I am in charge of my mind, my thoughts, and my life.

[rosiebear]

*Edited*
For those who are not "clicking" with AA, for whatever reason, it's not the only choice. 

I highly recommend SMART recovery meetings (not 12-step based) and a therapist who specializees in treating addictive behaviors with cognitive-behavior therapy.

[krisandgrace]

Nov 6, 2014 15:50:58 GMT -5 @courtneyloves said:

That's a good question, Lexx. I've always found AA helped, but I didn't have issues with the higher power. I know there are people in AA who are atheist. But I've never quite grasped how that worked. Interesting that you think more about alcohol when you're at AA. I guess if it works for you not to attend, more power (haha) to you.

Honestly, I get pretty squirrely about little stuff if I don't stay close to the fellowship. For me, it's not very much about not drinking anymore. It's about facing life!

I wouldn't call myself an atheist just because I feel like that is giving more thought then I give about the existence or non existence of God. I have gotten recovery in AA and have worked the steps with out really feeling too strongly about god. I probably think of hair products more then I do about a higher power. I was told early on if I had a problem with it think of AA as a power greater then myself (Group Of Drunks). This was supposed to be temporary until I felt the presents of God but I never really did. That said I have been sober for 19 years and still go to meeting, have a sponsor and sponsor other women so there is that. If you don't feel comfortable in AA do find somewhere you feel comfortable because having a group makes staying sober so much easier.

[flex]

Nov 10, 2014 16:13:00 GMT -5 krisandgrace said:

Nov 6, 2014 15:50:58 GMT -5 @courtneyloves said:

That's a good question, Lexx. I've always found AA helped, but I didn't have issues with the higher power. I know there are people in AA who are atheist. But I've never quite grasped how that worked. Interesting that you think more about alcohol when you're at AA. I guess if it works for you not to attend, more power (haha) to you.

Honestly, I get pretty squirrely about little stuff if I don't stay close to the fellowship. For me, it's not very much about not drinking anymore. It's about facing life!

I wouldn't call myself an atheist just because I feel like that is giving more thought then I give about the existence or non existence of God. I have gotten recovery in AA and have worked the steps with out really feeling too strongly about god. I probably think of hair products more then I do about a higher power. I was told early on if I had a problem with it think of AA as a power greater then myself (Group Of Drunks). This was supposed to be temporary until I felt the presents of God but I never really did. That said I have been sober for 19 years and still go to meeting, have a sponsor and sponsor other women so there is that. If you don't feel comfortable in AA do find somewhere you feel comfortable because having a group makes staying sober so much easier.

Well said!

[flex]

Nov 10, 2014 16:13:00 GMT -5 krisandgrace said:

Nov 6, 2014 15:50:58 GMT -5 @courtneyloves said:

That's a good question, Lexx. I've always found AA helped, but I didn't have issues with the higher power. I know there are people in AA who are atheist. But I've never quite grasped how that worked. Interesting that you think more about alcohol when you're at AA. I guess if it works for you not to attend, more power (haha) to you.

Honestly, I get pretty squirrely about little stuff if I don't stay close to the fellowship. For me, it's not very much about not drinking anymore. It's about facing life!

I wouldn't call myself an atheist just because I feel like that is giving more thought then I give about the existence or non existence of God. I have gotten recovery in AA and have worked the steps with out really feeling too strongly about god. I probably think of hair products more then I do about a higher power. I was told early on if I had a problem with it think of AA as a power greater then myself (Group Of Drunks). This was supposed to be temporary until I felt the presents of God but I never really did. That said I have been sober for 19 years and still go to meeting, have a sponsor and sponsor other women so there is that. If you don't feel comfortable in AA do find somewhere you feel comfortable because having a group makes staying sober so much easier.

Well said!