s/o What made your mom amazing?

[kellygreen]

I was reading through the responses below and someone - Hens? - said that their mom is amazing. I often think about this as a working woman with small children... what do I do that my children will remember? Will my children think of me as "amazing"? "Eh"?

[aspentosh]

My mom sacrificed everything for her kids, especially me because I was so much later than my siblings. She worked odd hours to make sure she could pick me up from school. She made credit cards in a factory so I could go to a private school. I didn't realize she raised 4 kids on ~$10k a year until just recently.

Even to this day she is an amazing mother and we are best friends. She will drop almost anything to help any of us out and she does it with a smile. I am lucky to call her my mom.

ETA: I should also add that even with all the hardships, I truly feel like I had an awesome childhood. One might say it was like growing up on Sesame Street".

[chessie]

My mom sacrificed everything, career, friends, everything for us. Made all my costumes for school, helped with all girl scout meetings, brought me to any riding lessons. She was always cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, some errand and helping do something for us. She was very selfless entire time never bought 1 thing for herself.

I could never compare to my mom though, be no way could afford to stay home to cook/clean/do laundry all day, and not go completely batty. I really don't know how she did it.

[krystee]

She's really funny and so positive, and just made things really happy and fun for us. She also adores my dad (and my dad adores her even more), so having such a loving set of parents was really nice, too. She worked PT at nights, which gave us time to bond with our dad, so that she could help out at school events, take us places in summer, etc. It makes me sad that I won't be able to do that with our kids. Also, as soon as the youngest was in high school, she went to college and earned her nursing degree at 47. She is an AMAZING nurse, and I am so proud of her for doing that.

[dexteroni]

There was a lot of stuff my mom did that I wasn't able to appreciate until I was an adult. A big part of it was centered around the adolescent and teen years - she realized that self-respect and assertiveness are big problems for girls in that age range, and talked a lot about how my sister and I could develop both. Her favorite advice was "stay true to yourself; don't do things you don't want to do just because your friends or a boy want you to," and that alone solved so many teenage problems. And even when I didn't heed that advice, the invariable bad feelings afterward made me realize I should have listened.

She was also really open about talking about the difficult adolescent topics, bringing up things I was thinking about but was too mortified to bring up first. In retrospect, I realized that she really demystified those years for me, and although I didn't necessarily take all of her advice at the time, by the time I got to college I realized how valuable it all was. I think she helped me not make some of the mistakes many high school and college girls make (dating losers, being too critical of myself, self-sabotage, etc.), and most importantly I think she saved me from the horrible self-esteem crisis many girls that age go through.

[starlily]

My mom left her tiny village for Bombay when she was 20 for nursing school, against the wishes of her parents. Then my mom immigrated to the US at age 40, essentially starting life over in middle age, so that my brother could have greater opportunities. She had to leave my dad and brother behind for 6 months, until she found a job & could get their visas. She navigated moving to a new country, moving within that new country (from NJ to SF), finding a job, and passing the boards, all on her own. I wasn't born until she was 42, after my parents got settled in to the US.

My mom busted her ass, not only for our family's sake, but to help extended family as well. None of my cousins would be US citizens if she didn't pursue the long road of sponsorship. She also helped a lot of the new immigrants in our community who came after her, helping them find jobs and housing.

There's a line in My Big Fat Greek Wedding: "I came to this country with $8 and made all of this for you!" That is what my mom did & I heard that line for many years before the movie came out. $8 was the immigrant stipend in the late 70s.

[cjeanette]

My mom and I didn't get along very well when I was growing up but I still would consider her amazing. She is always helping people out and doing things for others. Her charity and compassion for others is amazing.

[mbcdefg]

She always put a ton of effort into birthdays and holidays even when we didn't have much money.

She's always included MH as part of the family.

She's incredibly generous.

She's kept it together even though Dad is gone. I never even saw her cry, even though I know she's completely heartbroken.

[takeonyou]

Really she just gave so much of herself.

Her and my dad waited 10 years to have me (and my brothers). They lived off his paycheck alone for those 10 years and banked ALL of hers. That was the baby fund. She was able to stay home for 13 years with us (working some part time jobs when my dad was laid off or big expenses popped up). Both my parents gave up a life of jet-setting, parties, and fun to really BE THERE with us.

They wanted to move out of the city when we were kids (a few times). We sat down and had a family discussion. My brothers and I wanted to wait until we were older and my parents obliged. They listened to us and really took our opinion into consideration for big decisions. They treated us like people, not annoyances.

It was an amazing childhood. I was very lucky to have such generous and dedicated parents.

[countthestars]

She was my Girl Scout troop leader and showed lots of interest in everything that I was doing. But at the same time, she didn't hover. She didn't volunteer to be room mom AND GS leader AND basketball coach. She encouraged us to be independent.

She worked hard and took pride in what she did. She values her family (us and extended family).

She didn't make us do any activity we didn't want to do but once we were committed she taught us the importance of following through.

She has a very optimistic personality. She balanced out my dad's pessimistic and worrisome tendencies and stuck up for us in our teen years when my dad didn't know what it was like to be a teenage girl. She had strict rules but we never questioned that it was because she loved us.

[Deleted]

My childhood wasn't perfect, but my mom did some amazing things. She had me on her own, I'll spare you the long story, but she left a very bad relationship, moved home and had me. The nurse at the hospital brought her paperwork and was badgering her to sign me over, but she refused. When things were tight financially, she always made sure we had food to eat. She was always gracious with my grandfather, even when he was awful.

[Deleted]

My mom did it all--she was an amazing, tireless homemaker & is an amazing teacher (special Ed no less). She also was an activist & extremely generous. But what I really loved was her confidence & independence which I think she passed onto me. She took us kids (without my Dad who had to work) & gave us the most amazing vacations. Never did she hesitate to do things "alone"...she not only took trips but she made friends everywhere, bought property, investements, etc. all on her own. I left home to go to college 1000 miles away at 17, chose a male dominated profession, backpacked Europe, drove cross country, etc. all alone without. I really credit her for giving that inner strength to me. My BFF in HS wouldn't even drive on the interstate. It felt like such a burden to fear the unknown like that. My mom is not perfect by any means but she is an extra ordinary women, there is no doubt about that.

[Deleted]

She encouraged me to be independent. Not in a "go play by yourself because I can't be bothered" kind of way, but in a "I have faith that you can do this" kind of way.

Without her, I would not have had the confidence to do things like study abroad, move to different states, go on trips alone, etc.

She's always believed in my abilities and trusted me to do the right thing. I think I was overall a pretty good kid partly because I didn't want to disappoint her and destroy her trust.

[Mrs.Beagle]

She didn't put me by the side of the road with a "free" sign when I was a teenager.

[cjeanette]

Dec 6, 2012 14:46:25 GMT -5 Mrs.Beagle said:

She didn't put me by the side of the road with a "free" sign when I was a teenager.

I think this alone make most mothers amazing...lol.

When I think of the crap I pulled.

[Deleted]

Dec 6, 2012 14:53:34 GMT -5 cjeanette said:

Dec 6, 2012 14:46:25 GMT -5 Mrs.Beagle said:

She didn't put me by the side of the road with a "free" sign when I was a teenager.

I think this alone make most mothers amazing...lol.

When I think of the crap I pulled.

I am pretty sure that my teenage behavior has guaranteed that my children will be mouthy fuckers.

I was a pretty good teenager in the sense that I didn't drink, do drugs, skip class, any of the typical "bad kid" kind of stuff. But good god, I was sooooo mouthy. Everything was a giant battle, and I was always right.

I so deserve what's coming to me.

[Deleted]

When I was younger, my mom was a lot of fun--I could discuss dreams with her, or talk to her about anything and completely trust that she would respect me and support me. I was also born hearing impaired and she never made accomodations for me or let me feel sorry for myself, just encouraged me to be as normal as possible. Unfortunately her personality has changed dramatically for whatever reason and we no longer speak.

Luckily, I have a great stepmother too. While she didn't get me through childhood, she is a rock for me now. She's just incredibly grounded--not a Pollyanna, but just has a can-do attitude and keeps smiling no matter what. After the instability and damage my mom did to the family, my stepmother is an incredible gift.

[Mrs.Beagle]

I am afraid to have kids because I don't want one that was like me. I want one that was like my husband- apparently he was well-behaved from the womb onward.

[h]

My mom is awesome. It was always apparent to me while I was growing up that she adored being a mom—we were never made to feel like we were a chore or a burden. She was crazy fun—she didn’t mind messes or chaos, and was always coming up with science experiments and art projects for us, baking with us, inventing fun field trips to God knows where. She was extremely creative—we had the best birthday parties, the most fun holidays, the coolest snacks. She totally could have rocked Pinterest had it existed at the time. We lived a very educational, adventure-filled childhood. I had the fun house that all my friends wanted to hang out at.

She miraculously managed to raise two (four if you count my step-sisters, who spent significant time with us) fairly well-behaved kids without resorting to spanking, yelling, time outs, or grounding—as crazy as it sounds we all listened to my mom most of the time because we liked her and respected her, and she was really good about explaining the reasoning behind any rule we had to follow. I never felt like my mom was strict when I was growing up, but now that I am a parent myself, I realize the she was the master of setting and enforcing limits without us even really realizing it. And she somehow knew everything we were up to—we couldn’t get away with anything without her knowing it. I think maybe she is a witch .

She has completely boundless energy. It’s indescribable. She is 64 years old and is the only person I know with more energy than my 5 and 2 year old boys. She took three 3 to 5 year old grandkids to Disney World alone. What 60+ year old would take a (non-direct) flight with three little kids and then spend 12 hours a day for four days in a row at Disney without another adult? I am not sure I could handle that now.

She had a second trimester miscarriage, then a full-term stillborn, then lost my 8 year-old sister to cancer a few years later after an absolutely hellish year of watching her die. She and my father had a less than ideal marriage and eventually divorced. Honestly, she had every reason in the world not to get out of bed. And yet she continued to be this fun, amazing person.

It is interesting to me to read the responses about moms who sacrificed everything for their kids. While my mom did everything in the world for us, I don’t think she would ever call it a sacrifice. She had a life outside of us—she has always had a ton of friends, a very full social life, and lots of hobbies. I think she mostly did what made her happy, and we were just lucky that being with us was at the top of that list.

[countthestars]

Ok, I'm crying reading these. HORMONES.

Opera, that's a great story about your mom. You are both really pretty.

[Deleted]

My mom is nurturing and a great housekeeper.

[drloretta]

She was essentially a single parent for long stretches of time while my dad was deployed in the military

Instilled her faith/religion in her children, in a positive way

She doesn't put up with a lot of crap, and definitely exemplified to me the type of person/woman who has good self-esteem and can stand up for herself

She and my dad paid all their bills a month late (not MM, but I don't care at this point) just so I could have a (small) 10th birthday party

Volunteers her time for a variety of causes close to her heart

Anonymously paid for her best friend's daughter's private school education (still unbeknownst to her BFF and Mom only told me this summer)

She was The Cool Mom when I was in my 20s. I used to love her visits because we'd bar hop and basically act like peers. It was so much fun.

We still talk to each other every day. I love that we can connect even on mundane issues of day to day life

[Deleted]

Strong work ethic, joy of reading, becoming a capable, strong woman and adult, competitiveness.

[spunkarella]

My mom was young when she had me. Even though she was pressured to do so, she did not marry my dad just because she got pregnant. She put herself through nursing school, and taught my sister and me to be fiercely independent. She is smart, tough, and generous.

Even though she much prefers working days, she worked night shift the whole time we were growing up so she could earn more money and be able to spend more time with us. At the time, she told us she loved the night shift and could never imagine working days. I didn't know any different until she started days when my little sister was in high school.

[CallingAllAngels]

My mom is amazing. I forget sometimes how amazing she is. She grew up poor as dirt in an unhappy family. Her father was a disabled veteran with a lot of mental health problems. He died days after my brother (the oldest) was born.

My dad traveled all the time for work, and my mom was the one who kept everything together. In ~1988 (when I was 10) she went back to school on the stipulation that it wouldn't affect my dad's life at all (he was old school). She commuted 45 minutes each way for school, while working part time and raising 3 kids. She graduated in 1992. Days after her graduation, she left to go spend her last days with her mother who was dying from colon cancer.

She came home from work one day in 1996 to find the love of her life, my dad, dead in our home. In the weeks before his death, she fought hard to get his doctors to take his threats of suicide seriously. The years after his death were a mess, but our family is still together and we owe all that to her. She has persevered through more than anyone should have to life through.

My mom made a lot of mistakes. She was far from perfect, but I still think she is amazing.

[wanderlustmom]

My mom always made my sister and I feel like a priority.

She was a single mom who was strong enough to leave my dad after enough was enough with his cheating.

She never hovered but was fully engaged in our lives.

She would really listen.

She really believed in us.

She had a lot of friends and a full life of her own.

[insominac]

My mom's mom had a 6th grade education. When my mom was growing up, she was evicted from homes. She'd walk home from school with her brother to find all her belongings on the street. She was homeless for part of her childhood. She graduated with honors from a four-year college and became a registered nurse. She made enough money to support me and my younger brother after divorcing my physician father when I was four. She is the kindest person I know. She put me through one of the most expensive liberal arts colleges in the country. She managed to retire before my father.

She took me and brother on drives around the neighborhood during Christmas time in our pajamas to look at Christmas lights. She never raised her voice or hands to us in anger. She would play games where she'd chase us around the house until I laughed so hard I almost peed. Managed to create a network of friends that has endured for 30 years. I have a vague memory of when I was a little kid of several of her friends in our kitchen at night. Turns out that she had seen a strange man looking into our window at night and called a friend who called other friends to come out and support her. That's the kind of devotion she attracts. Never heard hear swear. Taught me what the word "budget" meant. Took in her mother in when she was diagnosed with lung cancer and took care of her until she died. She gave me and my brother her time, attention, and affection, which meant more to us than any toy or object.

Even though she doesn't need to work, she recently got a job as a nurse at Planned Parenthood because she supports the cause. She is my biggest supporter, my strongest advocate. My only regret is I don't have the words to express how awesome she is. One of my greatest moments was crossing the finish line with her during her 9th marathon. She was fine - I was sore for like five days afterwards. Did I mention I ran only the last mile and a half with her?

Nothing I do - not my graduating high school at 16, not my SAT/ACT score, not my salary, not my doctorate - will ever measure up to what she was able to accomplish. Without question, she is my biggest hero.

Not to make it completely sappy - she is a really shitty housekeeper. But she'd say that she'd rather spend time playing with us than cleaning. lol And she has crappy handwriting. And she didn't let me wear makeup regularly until I was 16. Did you read the rest of my post? By that time I was a senior in high school. And she didn't let me do an overnight at Amir's house. He was the drum major and for some reason my fellow colorguard members had our overnight slumber party at his house. I mean, come on! I was in the color guard in the marching band. Did she think I was going to have a fucking orgy?! But other than that, she really did no wrong during the rest of my life. lol