Have you had to make a final decision on something

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You've been told, "Okay, flexie, you have to decide what our next move is!" And everyone's staring at you, and there's crickets chirping in the background as you mull all the variables over in your head with the thought that some people could lose their jobs??

That happened to me yesterday. I sat in on a mediation with a city manager with their attorney, our attorney, and one of my stewards in attendance, as well as the mediator. The freakin' mediation went on alllllll day yesterday.

We pretty much got "nowheres-ville" on reaching a settlement with the two issues that are scheduled to go to arbitration in mid-June. The City Manager showed his true colors to the mediator and she was appalled. Frankly, I thought he'd put on his "nice guy" face in front of the mediator, but No Sirree Bob, he was a buttwipe even in front of a third party.

By the end of the day, their attorney was shrill and chewing out our attorney. And our attorney was getting stressed and shrill with us (which surprised me). It was 6 p.m. at this point so we were standing outside at the entrance of the buidling we were at, and our attorney looked at me and said, "Okay flex--we're at the crossroads. It's up to you to make the decision. Do we take their settlement (which is a fukkin' trapestry of injustice IMHO) or do we continue on with the arbitration?"

This is a huge decision to put on me because there's a small possibility we'll lose big time with the arbitrator's ruling. I had a horrific headache at this point and it felt like it was going to pop like a zit, but after thinking about it for a minute (while they're staring at me), I said, "We're going to arbitration!!"

"Whew, glad that's done!!" and "oh shit, what have I done??!!" is still whirling around in my brain this morning.

[Deleted]

You made the right decision. And it was totally inappropriate that your lawyer lost her temper. I've been exhausted and stressed and dying at mediations before but you go to the bathroom, bite your tongue, and act like a professional.

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elle, I'm glad you said that. I was appalled at his behavior. I've seen him act that way at our office before, but I didn't expect it the mediation. He's a younger guy and he's worked for us for a couple years. Our senior Legal Counsel is a lot more cool and collected.

I think I'm going to talk to my boss next week about J's behavior yesterday. Something needs to be said.

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He was stressed about typing up our final proposal even though we knew they'd say no. He tlaugingly old us that we couldn't talk while he was typing it up, but we knew he was serious. So we sat at the table quietly.

Then my steward got a call on his cell that he had to answer (he's a cop) so he retreated to the far corner of the conference room to talk for a minute. Our attorney's head shot up from the laptop when the steward started talking and glared at him. Then he took his laptop out of the room so he could finish talking. He didn't say anything but I thought "jeez buddy--CHILLAX!"

[WOT?*]

Did you change employers or does your steward have another job?

FWIW, I think you made the right call. I don't know if you're in the same region as we are and how feelings run re: acceptance/animus but I do believe that under the current administration and panel that you'll have a reasonably decent shot at a fair to good result.

On another (rather cool) note DH spoke at a conference in Florida. His presentation was near the end, immediately following keynote speaker Brian Hayes of the NLRB, who gave a very excellent presentation. (I sat in on his so I could see DH's. I'd not had an opportunity to see him speak before.)

Your attorney should have taken another room to type. But still, he should have managed to take a deep breath or three and calm the eff down. Stress is one thing, taking it out on your client or employer is another. Sometimes it's necessary, when you need to rein the client in, but as a general rule, deep breaths deep breaths dude.

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Hi Beepers!!

I haven't changed employers. My steward belongs to one of the seven groups that I represent.

I just got an e-mail from our attorney (yay for us for "working" on weekends lol), and he added something to a potential Letter of Agreement that he's working on. It does make it a bit more palatable, but I'm going to run it past my steward before I get excited about anything.

Apparently J was able to talk the City Manager into waiting until Tuesday before the CM tells us to fuck off and we're going to arbitration in June. lol

I'd dearly love to take that cranky mo' fo' on, but I don't want my members to be harmed just because of my pride.

[Deleted]

It is definitely stressful trying to get the final proposal done - if it is accepted and you missed something it's really hard to undo, - but he should not have been turning the draft in the breakout room if he couldn't handle people talking while he did it.

And honestly, my opinion is that you should never make a decision based on pressure at a mediation. I think mediation is a lot like buying a car. You can be forced into making a decision you regret if you allow yourself to be caught up in the pressure to make a deal. If it is a good deal, you won't feel pressured, you'll feel gleeful and in control. And if it's a bad deal but you think it's the best you are gong to get, it is almost always still available after the mediation anyway.

[WOT?*]

I forgot (or didn't realize) you represented public sector too. I knew the electricians but my poor old befuddled brain. lol.

Saw your other post re: date night. woot. =)

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I have three public sector groups. They are THE most difficult groups to represent. Ugh.

I'd take my utility groups over them any day. Not the members--most of them are awesome. It's the city/borough managers that suck, plus they have answer to the public/council/assembly, which makes it even more sucky. Oh well.