If Family is your DCP

[ruby412]

Do you pay them? I'm curious. I know several of you have family members who take care of the baby while you work.

[silverjm]

Yes. We pay MIL $200 a month. We insisted on at least covering her gas since she drives to our house. It was a little bit of a battle to get her to agree to take it.

[charlielove]

No. I did ask, and my mom was ten kinds of offended that I even suggested it.

eta: She watches them two days a week, and has DD1 for about 2-3 hours of that because she's in pre-school in the morning.

[dixeedeluxe]

You guys will be jealous.

I pay my ILs $200/week to babysit both girls. They keep half and deposit the other half in accounts they set up for the girls. That's their choice.

[spaghetticat]

My mom watches her one day a week most weeks. I don't pay her.

[laurack]

I am so jealous of people who have family to care for the kid(s). Because of the astronomical cost of daycare around here I'm going to either be limited to 2 kids, or have to surrender my career.

If I had family to care for her for free or cheap that would be supermegawickedawesome. Ugh.

[dixeedeluxe]

Jan 4, 2013 14:10:11 GMT -5 laurack said:

I am so jealous of people who have family to care for the kid(s). Because of the astronomical cost of daycare around here I'm going to either be limited to 2 kids, or have to surrender my career.

If I had family to care for her for free or cheap that would be supermegawickedawesome. Ugh.

I don't want any more kids, but even if I did, MIL/FIL wouldn't "allow" it because they can't handle any more! LOL!

[thedahliharpa]

We paid MIL almost as much per hour to watch 1 kid as we pay our nanny to watch both. But, we've already established that she sucks.

[Deleted]

MIL watched DD 3 days a week for a few months and then watched DS 5 days a week for 6 weeks also.

We paid her $500/month which is a steal compared to daycare costs. MIL never refused to take the money or told us to give less (we set the amount based on about 50% of what daycare would have cost)...kind of pissed me off though since she watched SILs kids for 5 years for FREE and is now paying their high school tuition and cosigning on college loans for them.

MIL stopped taking the kids (abruptly with no warning) when FIL was diagnosed with bladder cancer. She literally called on sunday night and said we'd have to find other care for the next morning. FIL didn't start treatment for another month...it was just a weird awkward situation. Then MIL was mad that I put the baby in daycare instead of quitting my job.

[Regina Philange]

I do not pay her. I give her love and buy her groceries and everything i can to let her know how much i appreciate it though.

[ruby412]

You guys are lucky to have this! I think our daycare for next year is around $1100 per month. It's not terrible, but how do people afford something like that with 2 kids? I mean, I get how they afford it, but that's such a huge paycheck drain.

Dix - I love that your ILs do that. They are totally awesome!

And Dahli- What can I say? Your MIL continues to NOT surprise me. Lame City, USA; population: your MIL

[kandrze1]

My mom watches E Tuesdays and drops her off at daycare for us on Wednesdays. She wouldn't let us pay her.

[JuliaGulia]

I pay my Dad $80 dollars a week to watch Alexis M-F from 7a-12pm. I provide all of the food, diapers, etc. He wouldn't take the money at first but I talked him it. I would pay him more if he asked.

[Deleted]

Jan 4, 2013 14:37:01 GMT -5 ruby412 said:

I think our daycare for next year is around $1100 per month. It's not terrible, but how do people afford something like that with 2 kids?

$2100/month for us with both kiddos there 5 days.
the first daycare we used was $2800/month.
For comparison, we pay $1300/month mortgage on our house.

It sucks. After daycare and taxes (no health insurance in here either) my annual takehome is about $14k - and I am a structural engineer - that chick who designs the bridges millions of people drive over every day. I think I might be underpaid...on top of those crazy daycare costs. Keeping my job now is worth it in the long run b/c once the kids are in school, my salary will mean something again and DH and I can finally climb out of debt and fix up our fixer-upper of a house.

Crazy thing is we are considering a 3rd...daycare bill will be about $2900/month then - maybe less if I can swing a discount for 3u4 enrolled. This cost is temporary though. I will basically be working to pay daycare, but if I quit working now, I could never work in my field again.

Sorry - I rambled.

[jfh]

Jan 4, 2013 14:37:01 GMT -5 ruby412 said:

Lame City, USA; population: your MIL

ROTFCH!

I'm so jealous of you guys. I would SO love to have my mom take care of him, but she's 3000 miles away. On the other hand, he loves hanging out with the other kids at DC, so I'm glad he gets that.

[ruby412]

Softskate - I always forget that costs like these are temporary. It just seems like so much, but you are right, there will be a time when they'll go to school all day for free.

JFH- LOL @ ROTFCH!!!

[laurack]

Mine is $1600 right now for 1. Ugh

[kdrake8]

No. ILs watch 2 days a week. My parents watch one, bc they are not retired. We don't pay them - they won't accept it.

We do pay a family friend to watch the other two days.

[mumegs]

SIL watches her about half the day 2 days a week and we do not pay her. She is a SAHM with 3 kids though, and we do watch them a lot when she has to run out somewhere so it equals out. She should actually be paying us since the baby is so much easier to watch!! lol
She goes to daycare the other 3 days a week which we pay $40 a day for.

[unclejesse]

My MIL watches him. But my FIL has been out of work for the past few months, so they take turns. We buy diapers, formula, and food for them to use while he's there, but that's it. We've discussed hiring a nanny at times because the downside of it is that they can cancel at the drop of a hat, or they like to pull the guilt card on certain things (i.e. "We watch him a lot, the least you could do would be to come over for dinner, by the way, you're cooking). There's definitely pros and cons to it.

[ruby412]

Jan 4, 2013 18:15:44 GMT -5 unclejesse said:

My MIL watches him. But my FIL has been out of work for the past few months, so they take turns. We buy diapers, formula, and food for them to use while he's there, but that's it. We've discussed hiring a nanny at times because the downside of it is that they can cancel at the drop of a hat, or they like to pull the guilt card on certain things (i.e. "We watch him a lot, the least you could do would be to come over for dinner, by the way, you're cooking). There's definitely pros and cons to it.

I lol'd at this, but that would really get on my nerves too!

[browneyedhunni85]

My parents would not accept money to watch Christian. We do pay for my moms cell phone, it's the least we can do. My parents had a prepaid phone because my dad is so old fashioned. I wanted to be able to get in touch with her at all times in case they were away while C is with them. We also occassionally buy dinner for them and other items they ask for. It's nothing big, like bread or whatever else they need. They try to pay us but we won't accept it.