Failure to thrive?

[ohgillian]

~~ Poof! ~~

[CloudBee]

You don't suck at parenting. This has nothing to do with what kind of mother you are. Lots of babies have feeding issues early on. I hope you are able to get some answers soon.

[fallriverjenn]

I had a lot of issues with my son. He was initially in the Nicu because he was a little early but we stayed there for weeks because he would not eat. I remember how I felt at that time, I am so sorry you are going through this. He ended up having a feeding tube to get his calories in. WE eventually got transferred to a childrens hospital Nicu and got a feeding consult. They did a barium swallow study and found he was micro aspirating when eating. We added a thickener to his milk and all of a sudden he ate and gained weight. We went through a brain ultrasound, genetic testing and a neurologist before getting to this.
I don't know if that is the issue with your daughter but it might be worth exploring if you have not already.

[Deleted]

I don't have any advice but I want to chime in and say your obvious devotion and love for this child clearly demonstrate what a wonderful mother you are. I hope you get some answers soon.

[Deleted]

I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Just remember it is not a reflection of your parenting! Sounds like you have a tired LO.

[speckledfrog]

You are doing a great job. You are a good mother. This is a tough situation and you are busting your ass to do what needs to get done. Hang in there. It wwill get better. I hope you get some answers soon.

[ilikedonuts]

So its just that she is super lethargic and that's why she doesn't want to eat?

Does she have reflux? Does she spit up? Have you tried just plain formula?

DD was "malnourished" not officially failure to thrive from birth until 6 or 7 months. We FF from birth. Her issue with severe reflux though and a dairy allergy. Waking her up to feed her was almost impossible. We'd usually get less than an oz in her each feeding at night.

I am so sorry you are dealing with this. Its not your fault. You are doing the best that you can to help.

[MamaMaui24]

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. It sounds like you are doing a great job trying everything.

When is her next pedi appointment?

[MamaMaui24]

Dup

[GailGoldie]

if she is simply too sleepy and not eating - then it's probably not reflux, but if she fights eating it could be- even without spit up - silent reflux is just painful eating without lots of spitting up - one of my twins had it - he rarely spit up at all but was in a ton of pain when eating- and that started at 6 weeks.... it was a struggle for a few weeks until we got his meds right and could get him eating again- but even after that until he was about 8mo it was always hard feeding him.

talk to your doc ASAP - don't wait - and if you feel the doc isn't doing enough- find another one or a specialist. You are NOT a bad mother- you are concerned, which shows you are a GOOD mother - doing what needs to be done to help your child.

[OscarQ]

I'm on my phone so I can't see how old your child is but you don't suck at parenting. My son has FTT and it hit me like a ton of bricks - in some ways it was worse than his early delivery and feeling like my body failed to take care of him - it was very much a "JC! I can't even nourish the kid properly! I suck as a mom." moment. And that's not the case at all.

Talk to pedi and get a referral to a pediatric GI and nutritionist ASAP. Have your pedi call them to get you seen right away (they tend to have a long wait for appts).

And lots of hugs.

[liveintheville]

Both my kids were dx FTT. It ended up being a good thing and a favor our pediatrician did for us. If you get the medical dx then you get your insurance to cover testing, pedi GI, and often supplements or formula. Plus you're automatically eligible for EI.

I nursed and supplemented with formula. But FREE formula due to the dx. And we got a rx for it from pedi GI. It was the gross smelling, easy to digest, $50/can stuff. They were, also, put on appetite stimulants (old school benedryl) and prilosec or zantac. Again all rx and all covered due to the dx.

Anyway, my point is don't feel down on yourself about this. And don't think of the dx as a judgement. I did that with kid 1. Then I realized how having that dx actually made everything so much simpler. So when kid 2 was dx we were not upset at all.

Kid 1 age 5 is 33lbs. Kid 2 age 2.5 is 25lbs. They're still small but completely healthy.

Feel free to PM if you want to talk.

[Deleted]

Lots of hugs to you! You are a great mom and I'm sure you'll get this figured out shortly!

[elocrates]

Jan 5, 2013 12:50:43 GMT -5 littlespitfire said:

I just want to offer hugs. You are NOT a bad mother, her issue with feeding has nothing to do with your abilities or your love for her.

You are doing all the right things, including telling her doc how overwhelmed you are. You should also tell your doctor this. We are all here for you, so please don't hesitate to lean on this board.

This is exactly what I was going to say. So I will simply reiterate, you ARE a good mom.

[zeewifeandmama]

Just wanted to add my support. You are a GREAT mother to be worrying about this at all....I dont have any advice, but Id like to send stranger zombie hugs! You are doing awesome, I hope you can figure out whats going on soon!

[pugz]

(hugs) mama I am so sorry you guys are dealing with this. I think you got some great advice in this thread and I'll be sending good thoughts your way.

[Deleted]

You are a great mom. You are doing all the right things.

This is an anecdote and you know your baby best, but if it helps... one of my BFFs had a baby that was similar. She would not breastfeed so my friend exclusively pumped and every bottle was a huge struggle. She just was not interested in eating. She continued to eat small amounts as she grew. Her pediatrician did not worry because she remained on track with her height and head circumference, she was never diagnosed failure to thrive--but she has remained small her entire life. My DD who was born at 5 lb 12 oz full term outstripped by friend's DD in weight when she was 9 months old (friend's DD 18 months). My friend's DD was in the 0% until shortly after her 2nd birthday I think. Now she is at maybe 5%.

She is a perfectly healthy kid--just a really small one.

It seems like since your ped is concerned there may be more to your daughter's story, but you are doing everything you can for her and are totally on top of things which is exactly what you need to be doing. You are doing awesome. Keep it up and know that it WILL get better.

[Deleted]

My DH had MSPI & reflux. He was one of the few kids the pedi GI has ever seen who GAINED with that dx before treatment. I would get a referal for pedi GI.

[jaybird]

I'm an SLP and used to specialize in feeding therapy. Will she take a pacifier? How's her alertness when not feeding?

[jboho]

Just wanted to send my thoughts. Yo are not a bad mother!

[ohgillian]

Jan 5, 2013 16:53:34 GMT -5 jaybird said:

I'm an SLP and used to specialize in feeding therapy. Will she take a pacifier? How's her alertness when not feeding?

Thanks. At one point she wa hospitalized for about 1 week and was only allowed IV nutrition. (This was incidental to why she was there.) During that time, she took a pacI a lot. Otherwise, not very interested in it.

She is not alert most of the time. Sleeps 23 hrs/ day.

[imimahoney]

I am so sorry to hear about your daughter's problems. I highly recommend seeing a pediatric GI stat. It sounds like she needs intervention asap and possibly further testing to figure out why she is sleeps so much during the day.

Also, my son has MSPI and GERD (really really bad reflux) but was gaining fine. His symptoms were blood in stools and insane amounts of spit up/vomit.

[ijack]

Was she early?
My oldest was FTT and it sucks. It's such a horrible term. I would definitely speak to your pedi about what's going on. Lots of hugs!

[MadamePresident]

It sound like you are doing a good job caring for your little one. It will get better.

[mishap]

You are a great mom who immediately got thrown a curve ball in the already difficult world of raising a newborn. You are strong and doing great. Seek and take advantage of any help you can possibly get.

[ohgillian]

Thanks so much for all the encouragement and support. This has been frighteningly hard. I knew that it wasn't me, but really needed to be reminded of that.

I appreciate all the advice. I am taking notes of all the suggestions and plan to work thru every single idea.