I don't think anyone is hiring a babysitter to bring a four year old to a birthday party. I suppose they could leave the rest of them with their husband but idk, I've not seen that happen. I've not seen a birthday party for five year olds where siblings weren't permitted.
Maybe it is regional or something. Here, when they are younger, one parent will come with the invited kid. As they get slightly older (for DD1's class it was 5) the parents will just drop off the invited kid and pick them up later. The only times we all went as a family or I brought both girls was when it was specified on the invite.
Papie, what you described is exactly how every party we ever attended was handled.
I wouldn't even have dared to ask if I could go to a party my sister was invited to if my name wasn't specified on the invitation.
Would the mom then be required to get a babysitter?
5 and under I think is where it's understandable.
Understandable - not acceptable, but still.
Well, there is always ASKING. At Anna's last birthday, the mom asked me if she could drop her off, or come with both kids since her husband worked saturdays. I told her either way was fine, she ended up dropping her off.
I would just address the invite to the kid that is invited, and let parents deal with it when they get there. If they bring a 1 year old and he/she is upset re: the ponies, then let the parents cope with that. Unless the problem is space, as well...
It isn't that sibs are always invited it is just hard for parents to only bring one kid if it is the type of party that a parent has to be st. So this is only an issue for the younger age bdays.
I still think you could say something about restrictions of facility only invitee is invited or something.
When I was a kid I was never invited to my sisters friends birthday parties nor she mine.
Kids are so mollycoddled these days. YOU CAN'T DO EVERYTHING AND GO EVERYWHERE!
I'm not sure how to word it other than send the invite to them only like "Susie Smith is cordially invited to eat a boat load of cake and ice cream" but I'm not sure if that will really do the trick.
I nearly died the day I read on TN that kids weren't to open the gifts at the party anymore b/c some kids might feel badly that they don't get any gifts and turn into Birthday Girl
I would go with the wedding approach, on the envelope it says the name(s) of who is invited and if extras show up,
Would the mom then be required to get a babysitter?
5 and under I think is where it's understandable.
Understandable - not acceptable, but still.
How is it not acceptable to CHOOSE whom to invite to a party? This mentality is blowing my mind!
That's not what I was saying isn't acceptable.
I was saying them bringing the extra kids still wasn't acceptable. But that I understand why some parents do it.
If my kid wants a friend at his party, and that meant that that friends 2 yr old brother has to come, I would be ok with it. But my DS is only turning 4 this year. So anyone coming to his party DH and I are already close to and probably don't care if other kids come. We have not done the school age party yet.
When I was a kid I was never invited to my sisters friends birthday parties nor she mine.
Kids are so mollycoddled these days. YOU CAN'T DO EVERYTHING AND GO EVERYWHERE!
I'm not sure how to word it other than send the invite to them only like "Susie Smith is cordially invited to eat a boat load of cake and ice cream" but I'm not sure if that will really do the trick.
I nearly died the day I read on TN that kids weren't to open the gifts at the party anymore b/c some kids might feel badly that they don't get any gifts and turn into Birthday Girl
Would the mom then be required to get a babysitter?
5 and under I think is where it's understandable.
Understandable - not acceptable, but still.
That's not the host problem. That's the invitees issue. It is rude to invite yourself or extra people to a party.
Of course it is! But if my kid wanted his friend there, I'd be ok with it if bringing the sibling got the kid there. I dunno. I'm not there yet, so maybe I don't understand.
We just had DD1's birthday party last weekend. I invited the preschool class kiddos plus a couple of other little friends. I had two people ask if siblings were invited and said yes to both; someone else showed up with an infant sibling on the day of.
Luckily, the babies (there ended up being two) didn't count toward our head-count. So it ended up being NBD.
We went to one party at the local aquarium where the invite said that siblings and additional parents were welcome but would have to pay their own admission. I'm sure some people would consider that tacky, but I appreciated that they were really clear up front.
You're going to be one of those moms. You know the one who is mad Little Johnny wasn't invited to all the parties, aren't you?
Lol. No. I said earlier we currently don't invite DS's classmates to his parties, cause obviously it can turn into a clusterfuck.
I'm going to be the type of mom who doesn't get a stick up her ass about who shows up to my kids party.
But I don't throw Pinterest worthy parties. This year we are renting a bounce house and having snacks and cake. I don't give a flying fuck who comes, as long as my kid is happy on his birthday.
Yeah, see, we have big house parties so it's totally NBD if kids bring siblings but eeeeek!! In a year or two, he's going to start wanting them at specific places and only inviting certain friends. It's going to get sticky if we have to pay by the head.
I like the way litebright's aquarium story went. I also don't care if that's tacky, as a guest, I like knowing what the deal is with things like that anyway.
You're going to be one of those moms. You know the one who is mad Little Johnny wasn't invited to all the parties, aren't you?
She said right now she doesn't see herself minding extra guests/sibs. Not really the same thing. If you have the space and the party is conducive to it, then maybe you wouldn't mind. There are factors at play here, man.
That's not the host problem. That's the invitees issue. It is rude to invite yourself or extra people to a party.
Of course it is! But if my kid wanted his friend there, I'd be ok with it if bringing the sibling got the kid there. I dunno. I'm not there yet, so maybe I don't understand.
Ok, but you can imagine it, right? You plan a party and your kid invites 10 friends. 17 kids show up. I'd rather just 5 friends show up without siblings than have all those extra kids there. If I plan a party for 10, there would not be enough food/goodie bags/etc for more than that and it's ridiculously rude for a parent to put a host in such a ridiculously awkward position as to assume that they can bring more kids than are invited.
If I were paying per head at some king of facility I would care. But to come hang in my backyard and eat cake and pizza? Yeah, I'm not going to pause if a sibling tags along. Especially if that kids parents are there and not just dropping their kids off.
Do you guys remember me posting in the summer after my niece's bday party? My sister had treat bags made up for each of the kids who were invited, then siblings came and TOOK THE TREATBAGS as they were leaving! So some of the ACTUAL invitees didn't get them!
Oh my lord, it still chaps my ass to think about this.
OMG! I'd be pissssed! Don't fuck with my treat bags goddammit!
Hey, I put a ton of work into my kid's parties. I had a shitton of kids not RSVP and ended up showing up and I ran out of treat bags and I way over made. Things never go according to plan!
If I were paying per head at some king of facility I would care. But to come hang in my backyard and eat cake and pizza? Yeah, I'm not going to pause if a sibling tags along. Especially if that kids parents are there and not just dropping their kids off.
You're going to be one of those moms. You know the one who is mad Little Johnny wasn't invited to all the parties, aren't you?
Lol. No. I said earlier we currently don't invite DS's classmates to his parties, cause obviously it can turn into a clusterfuck.
I'm going to be the type of mom who doesn't get a stick up her ass about who shows up to my kids party.
But I don't throw Pinterest worthy parties. This year we are renting a bounce house and having snacks and cake. I don't give a flying fuck who comes, as long as my kid is happy on his birthday.
It isn't about Pinterest type parties. It's about having the means to add extra kids and the space. I know if I 10 kids RSVP I can accommodate them. If those 10 bring 2 siblings each, that's 30. It adds up quick.