Look people

[dowagercountess]

I am not defending her. I have said what I believe and that I am not sure of everything. But what I do know is that this is an unhealthy person who doesn't have it in her to make the correct decision to ignore this place. And I know that a lot of what she is reading would upset her greatly. And because I am not sure how mentally healthy she is, I can't be sure how she would react to that in terms of harm to herself. And that right there, is why I keep speaking up. Your curiosity is not worth that possibility.

I don't have a sister, but there's about 10 or so ML'rs who have met me and can vouch for my general judgement and sanity.

[mamasaurus]

I wish everyone had somebody like you to care about them this way, DC.

[Muddled]

You have class.

[dowagercountess]

Cjoy, I have not said anything here that I wouldn't or haven't said to her.

[speckledfrog]

I think you have a good heart, dowager.

[dowagercountess]

And it's entirely possible she could choose to hate me for it. At the same time, for me, it would be wrong to sit by and do nothing. Now if you, and emilie, and LHC, and toledo continue your mission, then it's on you. But I've made it clear that I think it's wrong and harmful.

[gozf]

Jan 9, 2013 21:06:34 GMT -5 mofongo said:

You're good people Dowager.
I think jlm would be better off with no internet access for a while.

I wholeheartedly agree with both of these statements.


Sent from my iPhone using ProBoards app

[Deleted]

Jan 9, 2013 21:06:34 GMT -5 mofongo said:

You're good people Dowager.
I think jlm would be better off with no internet access for a while.

Completely agree.

[lemondrop]

Jan 9, 2013 21:05:48 GMT -5 dowagercountess said:

And it's entirely possible she could choose to hate me for it. At the same time, for me, it would be wrong to sit by and do nothing. Now if you, and emilie, and LHC, and toledo continue your mission, then it's on you. But I've made it clear that I think it's wrong and harmful.

This, right, here... ^o)

[flex]

You have a big heart, DC.

I knew eventually this would all come crashing down on jlm. She just put way too much info out there. It was just a matter of time. We all had our questions and concerns and WTF's, but most of us kept it to ourselves. It just took the straw to break the camel's back for the box to be opened and all the little buzzing bugs came flying out.

[cleo29]

I get being curious about how much was true and how much was lies, but I don't get feeling entitled to know.

this whole situation makes me think of person picking at a scab over and over again.

[eddy]

Jan 9, 2013 21:20:51 GMT -5 cleo29 said:

I get being curious about how much was true and how much was lies, but I don't get feeling entitled to know.

this whole situation makes me think of person picking at a scab over and over again.

Nods

[cleo29]

I have been seeing people being demanding, not just curious and it comes off as "I have a RIGHT to know the truth" when none of us do. I take that back, the people I could see feeling that way are the ones she spoke to offline and reached out to her.

No one has to agree with me and I'm not saying that I'm not curious, but it seems that this is not just some bored housewife that made up a pack of lies to get sympathy.

[cleo29]

Really? not in their tone or bringing it up again or asking repeatedly? I am not saying that they said it, I am saying that is the impression I get. again, you don't have to agree with me. It's fine.

[spitforspat]

I feel like my mom just told me how disappointed she is in me.

::hangs head:: shaaaaame

[cleo29]

Jan 9, 2013 21:32:10 GMT -5 mofongo said:

Jan 9, 2013 21:22:08 GMT -5 Lucy Honeychurch said:

I see people asking questions, but I don't see anyone saying they're entitled to know. I don't think in entitled to know, but yeah, I'm curious. As are a lot of people, not just emilie or cjoy or Toledo or me.

Lucy, I haven't seen you post anything negative about jlm/outwardly doubt her or even ask a lot about the situation. I think you've been very neutral.

I agree with this.

[melindafelinda]

Next year I'm going to run the SS exchange. You get to know all the information and call other people assholes for wanting to know the same thing. I can't lose.

[dowagercountess]

Jan 9, 2013 21:39:14 GMT -5 melindafelinda said:

Next year I'm going to run the SS exchange. You get to know all the information and call other people assholes for wanting to know the same thing. I can't lose.

It's all yours

[lightyears]

DWC, you are good people. tell her i'm thinking about her, would you?

[dowagercountess]

Sure thing, lightyears, if she ever speaks to me again!

[papie]

DC I think you are a good person with your heart at the right place. But at the same time, unless you are PMing cjoy/emilie/Toledo/everyone else with specifics on why you think jlm is ill and why we need to stop talking about her crazy MUD, it is a bit lame and holier-than-thou.
I get it, you believe her. We don't. She can stay away if it is best for her.
I don't remember as much sympathy for other mentally ill liars like msbliss. But the shaming for asking questions that are totally relevant and entertaining (let's not forget our number one mission here) is a but much.

[SKP82]

Jan 9, 2013 20:58:20 GMT -5 dowagercountess said:

I am not defending her. I have said what I believe and that I am not sure of everything. But what I do know is that this is an unhealthy person who doesn't have it in her to make the correct decision to ignore this place. And I know that a lot of what she is reading would upset her greatly. And because I am not sure how mentally healthy she is, I can't be sure how she would react to that in terms of harm to herself. And that right there, is why I keep speaking up. Your curiosity is not worth that possibility.

I don't have a sister, but there's about 10 or so ML'rs who have met me and can vouch for my general judgement and sanity.

This right here is why everyone should just stop. She has said before she's tried to end her life and was considering doing so before her divorce was final.

This is just really fucking sad.

[ClaireOtoms]

Since I don't post regularly I have refrained from much participation here, but maybe my perspective can be a little more objective, since I don't have much invested.

This whole thing has turned toxic and brought out the ugly in a lot of normally very rational, seemingly sane individuals. It might be a good idea to just take a big step back and drop the whole thing for a while.

[tulip]

Jan 9, 2013 22:05:19 GMT -5 ClaireOtoms said:

Since I don't post regularly I have refrained from much participation here, but maybe my perspective can be a little more objective, since I don't have much invested.

This whole thing has turned toxic and brought out the ugly in a lot of normally very rational, seemingly sane individuals. It might be a good idea to just take a big step back and drop the whole thing for a while.

I don't really see it this way. I've jumped on and off the past few months and I know this community. Yes, it's a bunch of women who are nosey. But that is normal and human.

To me a bunch of ML where invested in JLM and hearts, emotions went out to her. Most cried over her internal issues with her youngest daughter. Mothers tried to put themselves in her position and it tore them up.

Dowager shouldn't have to defend herself, she just is trying to ease everyone away from the situation. Buy JLM was a poster from WAY back on the nest. The Regular posters and even those who lurked are trying to piece it together.

It's sad no matter how you slice it, but it also feels like the community was ripped off. Time, emotion and thought went in to CU/JLM and those who gave it want answers.

Sorry you got put in the middle Dowager, you really are a class act.

[underwaterrhymes]

Very well put, tulip.

[ClaireOtoms]

Oh, don't get me wrong; I totally understand the emotional investment wrt jlm, and I appreciate the blunt no-holds-barred attitude of the board. It's just reaching a level of cattiness (something of which this board is rarely guilty though often accused).

[tulip]

Jan 9, 2013 22:17:09 GMT -5 ClaireOtoms said:

Oh, don't get me wrong; I totally understand the emotional investment wrt jlm, and I appreciate the blunt no-holds-barred attitude of the board. It's just reaching a level of cattiness (something of which this board is rarely guilty though often accused).

I'm sorry you see it that way. I see that JLM was a regular, in the inner circle and now those who thought she was one of them are reeling. They feel they deserve answers and on one level they do. Dowager is strong so she has put it in her for them to direct that at.

This community will flame you and on the same night they will want to cut your H. This is real life and JLM stepped in it and is getting a huge flaming because they feel betrayed. She may have a mental illness or could be her sister on the phone. I don't know, but all the reactions are human.

[SKP82]

Jan 9, 2013 22:22:08 GMT -5 mofongo said:

There's just nothing left to be said, unless she comes back, which I sincerely hope she doesn't b/c I don't think it's in her best interest.

Yep.

[Jermys]

I'm with Dowager.

[thebamker]

Jan 9, 2013 21:59:48 GMT -5 papie said:

DC I think you are a good person with your heart at the right place. But at the same time, unless you are PMing cjoy/emilie/Toledo/everyone else with specifics on why you think jlm is ill and why we need to stop talking about her crazy MUD, it is a bit lame and holier-than-thou.
I get it, you believe her. We don't. She can stay away if it is best for her.
I don't remember as much sympathy for other mentally ill liars like msbliss. But the shaming for asking questions that are totally relevant and entertaining (let's not forget our number one mission here) is a but much.

The problem is its being called MUD by ppl but it's really not. Sadly, those who know that are trying to drop the hint and stop short of gutting a person on the Internet. And at this point, I believe there are plenty of ppl who don't give a shit about what is true anyway. It's just way more fun to assume.

I'm guessing I only know a fraction of what DC knows and I think she did the right thing.