Sappy alert: Elderly couple dies same day

[catbus]

My mom just posted this on Facebook because they're from her hometown. It's not sad; the couple had been married 65 years and died of natural causes/
www.duluthnewstribune.com/event/article/id/254685/

Copy and paste:
In 65 years of marriage, most of it spent in Crookston, Minn., Clifford and Eva Vevea did everything together.

“They went dancing nearly every weekend,” son Kip said, and he remembers they once were featured in a newspaper story. “The reporter wrote that they were the Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers” of the region.

“Even when Dad painted the house, she was up there alongside him, painting. In the house, they moved their recliners together so they could hold hands,” Kip said.

Two weeks ago, their health failing, Cliff, 93, and Eva, 90, shared a room and held hands at Altru Hospital in Grand Forks. When they were moved last week to a room at Valley Eldercare Center, staff there “put the beds together for them so they could touch,” Kip said. “My mother was still awake enough to touch his hand.”

Sunday morning, Cliff Vevea died.

A nurse asked Eva if she’d like to hold her husband’s hand once more.

She did.

A few hours later, she died.

A rare case

Jim Bredman, funeral director at Stenshoel-Houske Funeral Home in Crookston, said it’s not unusual for a spouse to die within a year of the other’s passing. “It’s been called the anniversary syndrome,” he said.

“But this is a rare case. In my 41-year career, we had one other occasion where we had a companion funeral” because of death by natural causes. “In that case, the two died within a day and a half.”

Alveda Scholin of Crookston was a close friend of the Veveas.

“They were always together, always wonderfully happy together,” she said. “Especially in the later years, they always held hands.

“It’s so unreal that they would die on the same day. But Eva had prayed for that. It would have been very sad for the one left behind because of their closeness.”

Kip Vevea (pronounced VEE-vee) was in Texas when he received word that his mother had suffered a heart attack on Dec. 15. She had been on dialysis for kidney failure.

“By the time we got to Watertown, S.D., we got a call that dad had had a heart attack,” Kip said. When he reached the hospital in Grand Forks, he learned that doctors had inserted stents for the heart but his father’s kidneys had failed.

“I got to talk to him the first day,” Kip said. “After that, I’m not sure he knew we were there.”

He was able to talk with his mother, too. At the eldercare center later, she did not speak, he said, but she seemed to know he was there and was able to respond to his words.

Good life together

Clifford Vevea was born and raised in Thief River Falls, where in the 1930s he starred as a tap dancer in high school musical productions. He worked as a sales clerk until he entered the Army in 1944, serving in the Philippines and, after the war, with occupation forces in Japan.

He married Eva Larsen on July 11, 1947, in Thief River Falls. They moved to Crookston in 1964, where Clifford worked with Job Service until he retired in 1985.

Eva was born on the family farm in Red Lake County, graduated from high school in Plummer, Minn., and worked as a billing clerk in Thief River Falls. In Crookston, she worked at a U.S. Department of Agriculture office, retiring in 1984.

Judy Vevea, Kip’s wife, said that she always admired the durable closeness of Kip’s parents.

“He wrote poems for her,” she said. “He wrote songs for her. They were madly in love.”

The funeral for Clifford and Eva Vevea will be Saturday morning in Crookston. They will be buried — within reach of each other — Saturday afternoon at Greenwood Cemetery in Thief River Falls.

“They were ready to go,” Kip Vevea said. “They said they had had a good life together, and they wanted to go together.”

[Deleted]

I would love for that to happen to us.

[chessie]

Jan 10, 2013 17:36:31 GMT -5 v said:

I would love for that to happen to us.

I agree.

[catbus]

Jan 10, 2013 17:36:31 GMT -5 v said:

I would love for that to happen to us.

Right? It's perfect. Long, full lives, and no living without each other. I'm not a very sentimental person, but this made me tear up.

[Miss Phryne Fisher]

OMG! That is near the town where my grandparents lived (Fertile, MN) and I know the area well. And I was born in Thief River Falls. You NEVER EVER see these towns on the news (well, Crookston was for the Dru Sjodin case). I have to wonder if anyone in my family knew this couple, my grandpa also served in the Phillipines and was active in veterans affairs until he died in 1995. That is absolutely a wonderful story, what a life.

[catbus]

Jan 10, 2013 17:45:00 GMT -5 Miss Phryne Fisher said:

OMG! That is near the town where my grandparents lived (Fertile, MN) and I know the area well. And I was born in Thief River Falls. You NEVER EVER see these towns on the news (well, Crookston was for the Dru Sjodin case). I have to wonder if anyone in my family knew this couple, my grandpa also served in the Phillipines and was active in veterans affairs until he died in 1995. That is absolutely a wonderful story, what a life.

Yeah, I've known very few people who've ever heard of TRF. I don't know how my ancestors chose to stay there. I kind of imagine they came over the border from Manitoba and decided "OK, we're technically in the U.S. Good enough."

[Miss Phryne Fisher]

Jan 10, 2013 17:51:25 GMT -5 catbus said:

Jan 10, 2013 17:45:00 GMT -5 Miss Phryne Fisher said:

OMG! That is near the town where my grandparents lived (Fertile, MN) and I know the area well. And I was born in Thief River Falls. You NEVER EVER see these towns on the news (well, Crookston was for the Dru Sjodin case). I have to wonder if anyone in my family knew this couple, my grandpa also served in the Phillipines and was active in veterans affairs until he died in 1995. That is absolutely a wonderful story, what a life.

Yeah, I've known very few people who've ever heard of TRF. I don't know how my ancestors chose to stay there. I kind of imagine they came over the border from Manitoba and decided "OK, we're technically in the U.S. Good enough."

LOL mine went upwards...from Norway to NY straight to Fertile. Technically Melvin, a town that isn't even there anymore.
I have no idea what kept them all there either!

[catbus]

Jan 10, 2013 17:55:01 GMT -5 Miss Phryne Fisher said:

Jan 10, 2013 17:51:25 GMT -5 catbus said:

Yeah, I've known very few people who've ever heard of TRF. I don't know how my ancestors chose to stay there. I kind of imagine they came over the border from Manitoba and decided "OK, we're technically in the U.S. Good enough."

LOL mine went upwards...from Norway to NY straight to Fertile. Technically Melvin, a town that isn't even there anymore.
I have no idea what kept them all there either!

Funny! Mine went France->Manitoba->TRF and Sweden->??->TRF. Yah, sherr, ya betcha.

[cosmowife]

My great aunt and uncle died within 3 days. She literally couldn't live without him once he died. They were both in their late 90's. I just remember my father making the 10+ hour drive with my 90+ grandfather twice in one week for the funerals. Sweet in a sad way.

[audry80]

My Sister in law grandparents died the same day. Her grandpa passed away in his sleep and her grandma passed out, hit her head and died when she found him in the morning. The best way to go
IMO.

[rikki]

Between this, Jenni's cockatiel, and pregnancy hormones I am a crying, sappy mess.

[hockeywife]

This has happened to 2 of my clients recently. Well, not the same day, but within 2 or 3 days of each other.

When my grandfather was sick he kept saying "My life started on March 3rd, I want it to end on that day" I was so confused (and thought it was the dementia talking) but as it turns out, March 3rd was the day he and my grandmother met. Their love was truly amazing.

[hellonurse]

This is so sweet.

[Ashley&Scott]

So sweet. Something similar happened in my hometown last year.

[KaraOrNot]

[jackpackage]

:-(

Spoiler alert: It's the only part of the Notebook that gets me.

[raangoli]

Jan 10, 2013 17:36:31 GMT -5 v said:

I would love for that to happen to us.

Same here.

[CloudBee]

I'm practically sobbing over here.

[heyrebekah]

:-( :-( :-(

Although Eva Vevea makes me

[gumi]

I've always told my husband that is how we will end! Love that story.

Sent from my DROID3 using proboards

[catbus]

Jan 10, 2013 21:13:00 GMT -5 heyrebekah said:

Although Eva Vevea makes me

Right?

[mbcdefg]

What a great story.

I wish this had happened to my parents It breaks my heart to think that my mom, like both my grandmothers, is going to be a widow for likely the next 30+ years.

[phunluvin82]

Great story. My great-grandparents both lived into their 90's. They were married 72 years when my GGma died. My GGpa lasted about a year after that, but I wish they had gone at the same time. So heartbreaking to see him at her funeral, and, understandably, he did not have a will to live or great quality of life after that.

[starlily]

They are lucky.

My mom's grief when my dad passed was unbearable to watch. I can only imagine how she felt. They had been together almost 50 years. It's been a little more than a year & I'm honestly amazed she's lasted this long.

[WOT?*]

My father had Alzheimer's and his wife (partner of almost 20 years) was his primary caretaker. She had a heart attack on Memorial Day and was hospitalized. I flew down in the end of June (my turn to take care of Dad) and she was released for about a week to stay with my dad and recover her strength for open heart surgery. He was placed in an assisted living facility on a Saturday in early July and she went back into the hospital the following Monday. She had complications from her condition and the surgery. He died one week after her surgery in mid-July. She died three weeks later in early August, not knowing that he had already passed. We had a joint memorial service for them at the end of August.

DH's grandfather died about four years ago. His grandmother is still alive but suffers from dementia and post-surgical complications that began just after he passed. My grandmother lived fifteen years after my grandfather died, fourteen of them with progressing dementia or Alzheimer's; she was healthy as a horse until he became ill but his death was the turning point for her health.