For those that have house cleaners.

[chessie]

How did you get your spouses to be okay with someone else in their house cleaning?  DH is very uneasy about the whole thing even though they will being insured and bonded.

I am getting to my  breaking point though, I can't keep up with everything between physical therapy, full time work, my daily work out, horse stuff, dog stuff.  Only so many hours in a day.  I priced it out be around 65 each week and it would include laundry--which would be fantastic, since I spend a boat load of time doing that alone. 

[ijack]

If H had a problem with it I would tell him to either do the cleaning or I would hire someone

[Deleted]

For my husband, it was more of a "and we're paying for this why?" thing than a security thing (he never had one growing up, but I did, which I think accounts for the difference in attitudes). I told him that if he didn't want a housekeeper, he was welcome to do the cleaning himself, but I would be putting money from my paycheck towards one and my portion of the cleaning would be done by that person

By now he realizes it is a marriage saver (and a huge time saver).

Do you have references for this person? We've used people who come through highly-recommended services, or individuals who clean for friends, so we really don't have security concerns.

[genet313]

Jan 24, 2013 11:47:11 GMT -5 ijack said:

If H had a problem with it I would tell him to either do the cleaning or I would hire someone

I like this approach!  Between my parents, my aunt and me, we've never had an incident with a cleaning lady in the house stealing things, etc.  Generally, the worst thing that happens is they are not as careful with your things as you would be and may break something (still, we've never had a major incident).

I do notice that sometimes they are a bit rough with the vacuum cleaner, which results in all my wooden furniture getting scratched on the legs and such.  That's annoying, but not a big enough deal for me to take more time out of my week to clean.

[Deleted]

My husband is the one who wanted to go weekly instead of every other week.

He needed no convincing and would rather sacrifice getting a new car than give up our housekeeper.

[chessie]

V- neither of us grew up with one- our mom's did all the cleaning, etc, they were SAHM's. I dont have any references yet, but I will have to do some searching, gotta be someone in our circle that has one.

[Deleted]

Jan 24, 2013 11:47:11 GMT -5 ijack said:

If H had a problem with it I would tell him to either do the cleaning or I would hire someone

Exactly! DH had no issues with it. We don't really have anything worth stealing if that's his concern.

[chessie]

Jan 24, 2013 11:52:46 GMT -5 @gingersb said:

Jan 24, 2013 11:47:11 GMT -5 ijack said:

If H had a problem with it I would tell him to either do the cleaning or I would hire someone

Exactly! DH had no issues with it. We don't really have anything worth stealing if that's his concern.

True!!  DH is very concerned about his tools in the basement, thats the biggest thing.  Everything else isn't worth much- other then the dogs/horses- which dogs will be put away in the kennel obviously when they are here.

[midwest07]

If he has specific concerns about his tools or other items, keep those locked away in a closet or in the basement. We have had ours for almost 2 years, and never had an issue with anything going missing. She could be looking through our things, I guess, but I have certainly never noticed anything amiss. We got a recommendation from a neighbor and she's a one person operation, so we have the same one every time. In your case, I would definitely get a recommendation and go with a company or solo person so your H starts to feel comfortable with the same person coming every time.

Personally, as much as I hate laundry, I wouldn't love someone else doing my laundry. I am picky about wash cycles and what gets dried. I would be very detailed about laundry instructions, or just give her the "easy" stuff, like bed sheets, towels, cottons that get dried and folded. I do think $65 every week including laundry is a great price.

[devonpow]

Our housecleaner has been with friends of ours for years, so that helped. We don't keep fine jewelry laying around, and DH packs up all his financial stuff and puts it in the safe the night before she comes. I think it is unnecessary, but he feels better about it.

[halfpint]

Does he have the flexibility to work from home on the day they clean? That's what sold my H when we had one at our last place - he could work in his office while they were in the house, and it made him feel better that they weren't there unattended.

I think now if we hired one, he wouldn't be as anxious, now that we've had one without incident. For him, I think it was just fear of the unknown, he'd never had one growing up, and was leery about a "stranger" alone in the house.

[Bob Loblaw]

That's a great price. My H didn't need any convincing, but I can say that having a house cleaner and lawn service have definitely made our marriage better. No more nagging about cleaning up, mowing the lawn, etc.

If my H wasn't on board with a cleaning person, I'd just stop cleaning and leave everything for him to do in order to prove my point. But I recognize that's probably not the most mature way to handle things.

[chessie]

Halfpint-He might be able to maybe during his lunch hour. Thats the biggest thing, we both grew up in shitty neighborhoods, you lock your doors, and the idea of a stranger in the house is strange.

Midwest- our basement is full with tools, wouldn't be able to lock them. I doubt anyone could lift half of them though unless we hired a 300lb body builder.  Our house raised ranch and its setup laundry is downstairs, but everything is open downstairs pretty much, no way to lock from upstairs to downstairs.

Bob Boblaw- Actually thought about stopping all the cleanings myself, but with the dogs wouldn't be very safe. Anything left out my puppy will actually try to eat.

Checking out friends, angie lists, bbb- see what I can come up with. Maybe by spring can figure something out.

[gt7301b]

Lol, this was never an issue we discussed.

Cleaning the house is the one area that we fight about, even with a house keeper. My DH is not a detailed person and thus a shitty cleaner. I used to get mad because he either didn't recognize things were dirty, didn't care, or when he did clean did a shitty job. His aunt stayed with us for a couple weeks and had her cleaning lady come as rent. It was amazing and we hired her permanently after DH's aunt left. It has done great things for our marriage.

[emilyinchile]

Here it's normal to have a cleaner, and I grew up with one, so neither of us had to really be convinced. That said, we use someone who was recommended by a friend who'd worked with her for years, and at first we hid valuables and had someone home part of the time during the days she came.

Can you just lock the access to the basement? I don't know if that area needs to be cleaned or if that's where the washing machine is, but if that's the real worry then maybe it would be worth not getting laundry done and having that space cleaned the first few times until you get used to this person.

[M]

H use to help me clean the house. He has no issues letting someone else clean it. Just put up anything you don't want stolen and find someone you are comfortable with. We hired someone recommended by our neighbor.

[mgm]

I think with two working people in the household - esp with as much as you have on your plate, it makes more sense to get help than to stay stressed out. What is making him nervous? Would he feel better after interviewing people in person? Otherwise, maybe just find a company that can come when one of you are home, but it may limit your options. Sounds like a decent price to me, esp if laundry is included.

[fortmyersbride]

H had a cleaning person before we met so it wasn't a discussion. But had it been an issue and we were both working and had the funds for it, I would tell H he either needed to take on the cleaning himself or find a way to be comfortable with it. I know our cleaning lady does cleaning on Saturdays for one couple who prefers to be home while she cleans, so perhaps you could find someone willing to do the same?

[h]

Jan 24, 2013 11:50:49 GMT -5 @iheartcosmos said:

My husband is the one who wanted to go weekly instead of every other week.

He needed no convincing and would rather sacrifice getting a new car than give up our housekeeper.

Um, yeah.  My H wanted the housekeeper at least as much as me.  He doesn't want to clean any more than I do.  We also both had housekeepers on and off growing up, so it wasn't a totally foreign thing to him. 

I think this is a situation where he either gets on board with the housekeeper or does at least 50% of the cleaning.  You don't get to refuse to allow a housekeeper to clean your home unless you are willing to step up and do much of the work yourself.

[thumper55]

H would rather have a house cleaner, than for him to get in yelled at by me, for not cleaning

[chessie]

Called a few places, DH is going to meet them, check on their insurance and whatnot. He is still uneasy about the whole thing like I said before..the tools are his babies really. We are going to wait until spring for a full cleaning and hope we can find someone on the weekends, so he can at least see how these cleaners work.

I just can't wait, having some help would be a big load off of my back.

[sometimesrunner]

We both put in long hours this time of year. I told H I'm not spending my one day off cleaning.