How many jobs have you both had? I'm just asking because you said it took a long time for you to graduate due to moving for your H's job. Is he happy where he is? Will he want to move again if you did move to Dallas?
How many jobs have you both had? I'm just asking because you said it took a long time for you to graduate due to moving for your H's job. Is he happy where he is? Will he want to move again if you did move to Dallas?
I was wondering this as well. It sounds like he could potentially just keep moving around for better opportunities...and in the meantime, you will never really gain a significant foothold in your career field.
If you've finally landed a job you love, I would not want to leave after a month. Especially not in this job market.
I'd stay put, have H look for better jobs in your current area. Consider moving elsewhere in 1-2 years if he can't find something there during that time.
How many jobs have you both had? I'm just asking because you said it took a long time for you to graduate due to moving for your H's job. Is he happy where he is? Will he want to move again if you did move to Dallas?
H has been with the same company for 6 years. Last year he was hired on with a different company in the same position but got paid 15k more. So basically he's had two jobs in the past 7 years. I have had 3 jobs in the past 7 years. I worked a retail job through out college, a sales job (that I absolutely hated) when I graduated college and living in San Francisco, and now just started my dream job.
Post by orangeblossom on Feb 2, 2013 17:13:40 GMT -5
This is more of a personal response than a MM response. I would stay put where you are. $5K is not that much money to make another move at this point, IMO. You've already moved and sacrificed a lot for his career. At some point you have to be able to establish your career, and then you can maybe work to find a mutually satisfying place both professionally and personally.
I have made a couple of moves for DH and given up very good federal positions. We have tried to flip flop in that he does something for his career, I do something for mine, etc, but it's been really top heavy based on his career at this point (and probably will continue to be, because he now makes a lot more than me when we used to be less of a gap in pay). I admit I've been resentful at times, especially recently as I did not accept a really good position that was perfect for my skillset.
At some point, you can't keep moving and you have to work with what you have, there will always be something bigger and better for both of you, but is it fair for it to always be one person. Yes, sometimes life isn't fair, but I think a concerted effort should be made to find a place that suits you both.
Is the relocation being paid for, because $5k increase wouldn't even pay for the move. Stay put and get more experience for yourself. You can move for your DH's career when the promotion is immediate. Making him wait for 9 months just means something can come up that the promotion doesn't go through.
In the scenario you describe, DH and I would not move (and I see that is the way you are leaning) for many of the reasons mentioned, but I also don't think it would be wrong for you to move if it worked out best for you as a couple. This definitely isn't a black and white decision.