Planner or OCD-ness? longish....

[kimnsandy]

So a couple of weeks ago, my best friend planned on coming to our house this past weekend. As the time got closer, we discussed that she was not bringing her son so she could have a little adult time. She also asked if she could bring a new "friend" if he wanted to come out. I said sure.

So the plan was for her to come Friday.

Then it became...well it could be Friday afternoon or Friday night.

Then it was...it will be at least 6-7pm Fri night.

Then it was...well I'm waiting to hear from my "friend" so I'm not sure. Maybe Saturday morning.

Then it was actually friday late afternoon that I spoke with her via text. She said, I'm dong my hair now and then will be coming your way.

Then it got to be like almost 8pm and still no word or arrival. So I called and she was on the way finally. The "friend" was not coming.

Then once she got there, her phone was next to her the whole time as she attempted to ascertain if he was coming out or not.

It was a great visit. I love her to death. But she can NEVER stick to a plan when it comes to time, guests, food, etc. I wouldn't have been so concerned except that I had like 45 things to get done before she arrived and if I had known I would have so much more time, I wouldn't have worked like a crazy fiend to rush thru it all. Maybe even have enjoyed the day a bit more.

So after all that, my question to you all is this....when you make plans with someone, do you believe it's reasonable to have some expectations of plans being followed somewhat?

[2brides]

Yes, I am a HUGE planner and like to have everything ironed out days in advance so I can plan accordingly.

But.....I have a friend who is just like that. Once he said he would be at our house at 9am and finally showed up at 6pm as we were trying to get 2 babies ready for bed. Now, 20 years after originally meeting him, I just know that making plans with him are subject to change and never go as originally planned - and he isn't going to change. It has made me much less angry/frustrated/annoyed at him.

[ct]

Ugh, I can't stand that stuff and what you describe is my former BFF to a T. Drives me absolutely crazy and made me feel like she couldn't care less about how her wishy-washy-ness affected my day and planning

I'm an easy going person and am flexible on plans, understand when people run a little late, ect but there is a line between being flexible and just plain rude.

[kimnsandy]

YES!!!

"Drives me absolutely crazy and made me feel like she couldn't care less about how her wishy-washy-ness affected my day and planning"

THIS exactly! Love her to pieces and would do anything for her. But it sure makes it hard as hell to do anything WITH her.

One time we were supposed to go out to a bar at the beach after work. Well first she wanted to stop for a new outfit. She tries on ALOT of choices. Then she needs coordinating jewelry, shoes. then we check into the hotel and she wants to wash and re-do her hair. Then she hates the hair, re-wets it, starts over. I'm talking blow dry, flat-iron, the works each time. By the time we got to the bar, it was within 30 mins of closing. CLOSING!

We've never had a fight, but every once in a while I sure COULD!

[bluedaisyus]

We have a friend who is ALWAYS late. To everything. Like hours late, to the point where we all tell her the start time for something is an hour earlier than it actually is if we want her to get there anywhere near the actual start time, and even then its a crapshoot. It's a bit of a joke with our group, but it drives me a bit nuts.

[Duchess1]

That would make me crazy. I like plans. I like punctuality. I like manners :-)