Things I never thought I would say

[rjamz]

If you asked me 2 years ago:

"please don't put your lovey in your poop!"

[muppetinma]

Love it!

My favorite from today, and almost every other day - "Andrew, Mommy's toe is NOT a chew toy."

[laurack]

"crap her legs are covered in poop. Oh no, her hands in it too. crap crap crap"

"she is trying to put the butt thermometer in her mouth!"

"I feel so great, I got 5 hours of sleep in a row!"

[Deleted]

Please don't eat Mommy's shoes.

[muppetinma]

Feb 27, 2013 10:59:08 GMT -5 @hopefuljen said:

Please don't eat Mommy's shoes.

What is it about Mommy's shoes that makes them go crazy?  We have one of these-
One cube is mine, one is DH's, and one is DS's.  Andrew always crawls over there, pulls MY shoes out, and chews on them.  He never grabs any of the other pairs of shoes in there.  Just mine.  

[JuliaGulia]

"Alexis you can't eat the kitties tail"
"How did you get poop on your hands?! Seriously?"

[bean47]

Please don't suck on the trash can.

The dog is sleeping, stop pulling his eyes open.

[mamasaurus]

"Papa is looking for the smooth balls."

"Let me clean those balls before you play with them."

"That's not food, that's bird poop."

"Whose poop stain is this?"

"We'd better put the dragon over there so she doesn't get the shoes."

[katfco]

For DD
"Don't put your green beans in the VCR"
"Stop hitting the TV with your bowl" (broke the bowl with this one)

For DS
"Please don't bite my toe. Again."
"Get out of the dishwasher"

[musiclover]

To Adam:
(After finding something suspicious on the rug recently)
"I'm not sure if that's a tiny dried poopy?..... let me smell it and find out"

[The Foozzler]

Feb 27, 2013 10:57:11 GMT -5 laurack said:

"crap her legs are covered in poop. Oh no, her hands in it too. crap crap crap"

"she is trying to put the butt thermometer in her mouth!"

"I feel so great, I got 5 hours of sleep in a row!"

Yup. I've said this.

also, "stop rubbing cheese in your hair"

"thank you, but I don't want the rest of your mum mum"

"stop pooping at 4am"

[Deleted]

No, no. You may not eat the cat food.

Is there snot on this shirt? I can't see in this light.

[rubber pants]

"Jesus is not a toy!" - as she was grabbing for my diamond cross necklace.

[laouli]

Feb 27, 2013 11:03:46 GMT -5 muppetinma said:

Feb 27, 2013 10:59:08 GMT -5 @hopefuljen said:

Please don't eat Mommy's shoes.

What is it about Mommy's shoes that makes them go crazy?  We have one of these-
One cube is mine, one is DH's, and one is DS's.  Andrew always crawls over there, pulls MY shoes out, and chews on them.  He never grabs any of the other pairs of shoes in there.  Just mine.  

ooo where is this from? I need one of these!!

[muppetinma]

Feb 27, 2013 12:58:14 GMT -5 laouli said:

Feb 27, 2013 11:03:46 GMT -5 muppetinma said:

What is it about Mommy's shoes that makes them go crazy?  We have one of these-
One cube is mine, one is DH's, and one is DS's.  Andrew always crawls over there, pulls MY shoes out, and chews on them.  He never grabs any of the other pairs of shoes in there.  Just mine.  

ooo where is this from? I need one of these!!

Target.  I think it's actually on sale this week.  We have this right next to a 3x3 cube with those canvas bins.  It holds all of our junk.  I love it!

[laouli]

Thank you!!! I need something like this!! Im going to have to check it out!

[lydiasings28]

You're lucky to have a dog that will share her food with you.

Honey, those aren't cheerios. That's cat food.

Thank you for punching me in the face with my own phone.

[claralou]

"Please suck on the OTHER side of the iPhone - the one without the holes in it"
"No, we don't bite dog feet"
"You're tired. I promise you're tired. Ok then, mommy's tired. Can you pretend?"

[fusion]

to Jameson
"Stop teabagging your sister"
"No you can't help me wipe"
"Stop making out with the dog"
"Please don't put your tongue in my mouth"

[biblionerd]

"No, I don't want your booger"
"For the 20th time, STOP sitting on your sister's head"
"Please let go of your penis so I can put your diaper on"
"Don't play in your brother's poop"
"Don't play in your throw up"
"Help (DH) I have puke in my underwear!!"
"Don't touch the cat's bottom"


"This is fun, let's have a second!"
"This is fun, let's have a third!!!"

[pippilongstocking]

"We don't lick the dog"