If you went to a fertility specialist

[sonrisa]

Any advice?  We have our first appointment tomorrow.

[speckledfrog]

I'll be thinking of you, too!

[pamela]

Did they give you a packet to fill out in advance detailing your entire reproductive life (and that of everyone in your extended family)? Definitely bring another copy of that because my experience is they ask all the same questions again in the initial interview (had 2 offices do this to me).

[sonrisa]

Mar 11, 2013 17:44:09 GMT -5 pamela said:

Did they give you a packet to fill out in advance detailing your entire reproductive life (and that of everyone in your extended family)? Definitely bring another copy of that because my experience is they ask all the same questions again in the initial interview (had 2 offices do this to me).

Hmm. They sent a questionaire but only about DH and I.  I'll make notes about family members on it too in case they ask.

[new2this2]

I did. I'm 10 weeks today with an IVF baby. My advice is to write down any questions you have now because you might feel overwhelmed at your appointment and forget to ask. If you have any test results from an OB or anyone else, bring them with you. The only thing I needed to know about family is whether my parents went through IF and if there are any genetic disorders in the family.



If you don't know already, call your insurance company and ask them what your IF coverage is. Ask for price lists while you're at the doctors office so you can budget accordingly for any tests or treatments. Both my REs charged me as we went until we started IVF (where we needed to prepay). It helped SO much to know what it was going to cost before getting a bill.



Do you have any specific questions? Feel free to ask me anything. I did multiple TI (timed-intercourse) cycles with medication, several IUIs (intrauterine insemination), and one cycle of IVF (in vito fertilization).



IF sucks and I'm really sorry you have to deal with it. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

[underwaterrhymes]

Just wanted to send some positive thoughts your way! Good luck!

[gretchenindisguise]

I haven't, but wanted to wish you luck. I hope tomorrow goes well and you get some good answers and walk away with a plan - or at least a plan to get towards a plan.

[JayhawkGirl]

I'm in this crappy club too. I agree with pp about your list of questions.

For me, having the RE take over the care and critique of my cycles was a huge relief. I happily threw my bbt away and no longer felt like I was beating my head against the wall with my Ob's office assuming everyone has a 28 day cycle, ovulated on day 14 and that's that.

The nurses are quick to respond back, have a level of compassion that is so needed at this point in the game, my RE reviews labs and scans immediately if she isn't the one to do them. My cycles fell predominately on weekend appts the first few months and they didn't miss a beat.

Hang in there. IF sucks. But thankfully we have specialists who can help us and Internet friends who support us.

[KKD]

Good luck! I don't even remember our first appointment, it was so long ago, but I think new2this2 gave some great advice. In addition to going over your history, you may get started right away with an ultrasound and blood work, or you and/or H may get sent for preliminary testing. (Our issues were very clearly mine so H never even had an SA. I think I may have even left that first visit with a Clomid prescription.)

Lots of good thoughts coming your way!

[VeryViolet]

I agree with definitely writing down questions before you go because it is easy to get overwhelmed. Also, I think it is going to depend a lot on your prior history. When we went the problems were pretty clearly mine so DH was pretty much in the clear as far as testing. The doctor started with confirming my PCOS diagnosis so I had a lot of tests and then we moved forward from there. I also think depending in your issues it isn't a bad idea to talk to your partner about how quickly you want to pursue treatment (which you may not know until after you talk to the doctor). Obviously a lesbian couple isn't going to start with clomid because it doesn't solve the barrier to pregnancy. DH and I really wanted to try less invasive things like clomid before going to injectibles and IUI. Good luck to you IF sucks. I was kind of sad and excited all at once when we went to the fertility doctor, it is definitely a roller coaster.

[winelover77]

Just starting the IVF process myself. Met with the RE a couple of weeks ago. Definitely overwhelming and I am certainly leaning on friends who have gone through it. Wish you the best of luck!

[game blouses]

We did and we'll probably need to again for our second baby. Definitely bring a copy of the questionnaire with you. Also, if it's not covered by your insurance, see if they'll give you a discounted rate - ours did and it was really helpful. Good luck!

[sonrisa]

Thanks for all the feedback and well wishes :-)

We have Kaiser insurance (an HMO) so he has access to all of my previous tests and medical records. We got the referral through my OB so it is all within the system. I should follow up to find out what specifically will be covered (we have some IF coverage - i is why we went with Kaiser in the first place).

I've done a number of blood tests and DH has done a preliminary SA. I'm 37 and he's 40. We started trying for number two 16 months ago. Our appointment was delayed by my miscarriage last december.

[winston]

I think everyone in here has it covered, but I just wanted to come in and wish you luck. Just getting started with someone who understood infertility was a huge relief for me, and I hope you get a sense of that tomorrow, but I wish that you weren't facing this at all. IF fucking sucks and I hope that this will be a quick process for you now that you're seeing an RE.

(((hugs)))

ETA:  Aw hell, I'm sorry that you've had a loss, too.  We've had some losses while trying for our second and it's just been really hard knowing that we're losing them, but having to go through a lot to try to conceive again.  The combination really sucks, I'm sorry.

[sarahswim]

Seems like everyone here has said everything needed, but I just wanted to say good luck. We have a 3 year old from IVF and I can honestly say, I never felt better than the day we left the RE's office after our first appt. I felt like they were kind, sensitive, and focused on our needs, from financial to emotional & everything in between. That sounds really sappy...but, it's true. I hope it all goes well for you!

[TrudyCampbell]

No real advice, but good luck! I was so incredibly nervous for my first visit and afterwards I felt extremely encouraged. It really feels good to have a plan. 

[azurely]

I'm just starting this process too. We are meeting with an RE for the first time next week. I am equal parts nervous and excited. I hope your appointment goes well!

[discogranny]

I just wanted to come in and offer support. Our first RE appointment was mainly an informational consult about what steps we could take, where we were comfortable going with our care, etc. Once all of my tests results were back the RE put the info we had discussed into a plan and we got started with treatment. Good luck!

[karmasabiotch]

Be open
Lots of questions
Understand the whys of procedures and possible outcomes
Look at their success ratio of live babies
Feel like you are their only patient and not another number
If you don't feel like your needs are being met keep looking
The RE should spend as much time with you as you need and he should be available for questions and concerns at any time of day or night.

Good luck!

[game blouses]

Mar 11, 2013 19:35:25 GMT -5 karmasabiotch said:

Be open
Lots of questions
Understand the whys of procedures and possible outcomes
Look at their success ratio of live babies
Feel like you are their only patient and not another number
If you don't feel like your needs are being met keep looking
The RE should spend as much time with you as you need and he should be available for questions and concerns at any time of day or night.

Good luck!

This. Our RE was amazing; he did all of his own lab work and usually had blood test results for me later that day, which was so helpful when my betas weren't doubling for a while.

[Deleted]

no advice, just a ton of good vibes coming your way.

[JayhawkGirl]

Mar 11, 2013 18:32:11 GMT -5 sonrisa said:

I'm 37 and he's 40. We started trying for number two 16 months ago. Our appointment was delayed by my miscarriage last december.

This is me almost exactly. I'm 37, on cycle 16 ttc #2 and miscarried in December. I test weds to see if this last IUI w/clomid worked. Otherwise we are moving to injectables next cycle.

I know I'm fairly quiet on here but I have been around since the end of the nest (lots of sleepless nights for me through all of this led to lots of 4 am lueking). Please feel free to pm me if you ever want. I'll be thinking of you.

[papie]

I will be thinking of you, good luck! 

For us, it was a very reassuring step.  It felt really good to go.  I remember crying my way through the first appt, and the RE referred me to a therapist in their practice.  I went and it was so helpful. 

Just take it one step at a time.  It will likely be getting  your H tested, then tests for you.  Your tests will need to be done on specific cycle days, so it feels like forever, but remember that it is moving in the right direction. 

Good luck!