Renovators: need reassurance :) long

[Deleted]

Backstory: So we bought a house that was built in 1918. We liked some of it's "charm" (in laid floors, tiled entry way, pocket doors, original built ins and wood trim, leaded glass windows, etc.) and the walkability of the neighborhood. I also liked the fact that the surrounding houses don't all look the same. I tend to find that depressing. Anyway, it was still an old house though that needed a pretty extensive renovation (new roof, siding, windows, hvac system, and exterior doors,plus an attic addition and a bathroom remodel). We're about 3/4 of the way through. The only outstanding things that we have to do this year are to have the floors refinished professionally and for my H to refinish most of the interior doors himself. Oh and we also want to get someone in to fix up the patio area a bit. We plan to tackle the kitchen next year. To say that it's been a tremendous hassle to live through this with young kids is an understatement

The problem: my inlaws are house hunting and are only looking at new houses. It's gotten me worrying that we just made a big mistake. I'm worrying that we'll never be as satisfied with the house as we would have been if we had just bought new when we had the chance. This is not helped by the fact that my mom thinks we are crazy to be doing this with little kids running around driving us nuts

FWIW, I am happy with how things are turning out but I'm just ready to feel "done" and I'm wondering when that will be. I keep thinking of new things to add to the to do list after the big stuff is done (retile fireplace, move washer and dryer, add on an additional bedroom, replace second story floors, maybe finish the basement, etc.). I'm concerned that we're never going to feel done at this rate, kwim? Meanwhile I'm jealous that when my inlaws move into their new house, they won't have to do much to it. And also I'm aware that we'll never get most of the money back that we just put into the renovation. Which was fine when we were thinking that this was our "forever" house. But it's starting to feel like a money pit.

Anyway, I'm just wondering if anyone has been here before. Had to choose between an old house and new and chose to renovate the older one. Are you happy with the results? Did you get to a point where you did feel done? Did you go through a phase of feeling like the house was a money pit?

TIA for any responss.

[cosmowife]

We renovated a 1958 rancher - mid century modern style. It does feel like a money pit, and I still don't feel finished two years later (and we spent an entire year renovating before we moved in). We still don't have mirrors in our master bath, for example! However, every time I come home, I think about how much I absolutely love our house. It is completely one of a kind (it was a custom home built by the neighborhood developer). It has its major downfalls (bedroom arrangement doesn't quite work, no garage, no basement, flat roof with issues). But sometimes I just sit and stare at my curved walls and slanted ceilings and original slate floors and all of the other fun details that make my house so unique, and I feel so happy!

I don't know if you'll ever feel finished with a project like this. However, I know that a new, standard, run of the mill house is not for me. I was not at all happy with our previous center-hall colonial, which was newish - it never felt like mine. This house feels like mine.

[kaylie]

H and I often debate what we would buy if we ever sold our current house. If he had his way, we'd buy a brand new custom mcmansion and my way would be an old house in a specific area of town with lots of shops and restaurants that we would renovate to our liking. You just can't get the charm in a new house that you've got in an old house. It's more work, but it's worth it to live in something unique and beautiful.

[mrs.jacinthe]

As much as our current house is going to be a money pit (and it will be - it's 150 years old, it can't help it), and as much as I *hate* how long renovations take, I cannot imagine spending the same amount of money on a new build. I'm not the kind of person who can live in a generic builder-basic home and be happy. And the money to build a TRUE custom home just isn't there - in our area we're talking 500k or more to do what I would want, if I had to build.

I love how our home has history, and secrets, and stories to tell (even though we don't know them). I love knowing that a lot of love has gone into this house - children born, families raised, couples aging together, etc. Although we could look at a new house as ready to take on our story, it makes me SO HAPPY to live in a house that contains this much love. Every time I get frustrated by something (which, although we've only lived here two weeks has already happened more than once), I just think about how happy this house feels to us - and how happy it must be to be loved again. And I smile and get back to work. It's a labor of love.

[Deleted]

I would like to be done someday, but I don't ever wish for a new house. I'm mostly just bored to tears by them and the materials in so many of them are just junk, so I'd probably be doing just as much (or more) on a brand new house unless it was completely custom, which I could never afford. We do renovations in spurts as we can afford them, and I have learned to be happy with what I have in the interim. I try not to think too much about how I wish things were and just appreciate them as they are. My house on its worst day is 1000x more charming than any KB home a few miles down the road on its best day. Our neighborhood with its walkability/bike-ability is also unmatchable in most new neighborhoods.

I'm saying this kindly, just for self-reflection: Do you think that the problem is with the house, or are you the type of person that would constantly be thinking of ways to improve your house, even if it was brand new? I ask this because of my mother. She designed their house from the ground up. And I don't think there's been a year since they built it in 1980 that she hasn't done some sort of major renovation (adding a new kitchen, adding a deck, adding on a basement, moving the laundry room, taking out a guestroom and adding a bathroom, etc., etc., etc.).

If it helps, I saw the pic of your upstairs BR reno and just loved it. It's so charming.

I hear you on the money issue though. We're over $200K down from our PURCHASE price. Not to mention all the renovations. The house is our splurge though, and we enjoy it. If we didn't, I'd probably be in a much worse spot, mentally.

[Deleted]

@juno Thanks. Regarding your question, it's probably a little of both I think I'll feel better when the floors are refinished. They really bug me for some reason. My mom is also visiting right now and her little comments are not helping. When I told her about our plans for DH to work on the doors this spring, you should have seen her face, lol. I know it'll be time consuming but we really want them to be done right. No one is going to be as meticulous as the home owner, you know? Not without charging a small fortunae at any rate! I understand her perspective but I wish she would just be more supportive since it's not like we can just change our minds now.

[Deleted]

Oh yeah, I know. My mother even understands, sort of, the DIY renovation stuff, but you should have heard her when I told her our house was 950 square feet. Or when my uncle saw the beautiful wood sconce DH built for the hallway and said it looked like DH didn't have enough to do :/ But when people who "get it" walk in, it's awesome because we can spend hours talking about house stuff. Hopefully you'll find some house soulmates along the way

Since it sounds like you aren't planning to sell, try to tune them out and focus on what you love about your house. And if you have the right sort of relationship with your mom, tell her you'd like her to be a little more supportive!

[pitterwoo]

It sounds like you feel pretty happy with the situation except for some dissenting opinions from others who don't live in your house.

honestly our house may have been a mistake because the extent of the repairs it needed really weren't known to us. however, what does make it worth it to us is the location. the new homes aren't located where we want to live and the kind of lifestyle we want to have. I can catch a bus out my front door and we have off street parking and I could drive. This best of both worlds is a big reason why we wanted to live here and why we have invested in updating our home. If that's a factor in where your older home is than maybe a new home wouldn't be able to deliver.

If you bought a new home and stayed for a while, you'd have repairs and things come up there too. Not to mention that you still might have projects that you'd want to do like building a deck or retiling something.

[magdala]

Mar 13, 2013 13:31:46 GMT -5 @lcap said:

I'm worrying that we'll never be as satisfied with the house as we would have been if we had just bought new when we had the chance. This is not helped by the fact that my mom thinks we are crazy to be doing this with little kids running around driving us nuts

FWIW, I am happy with how things are turning out but I'm just ready to feel "done" and I'm wondering when that will be. I keep thinking of new things to add to the to do list after the big stuff is done (retile fireplace, move washer and dryer, add on an additional bedroom, replace second story floors, maybe finish the basement, etc.). I'm concerned that we're never going to feel done at this rate, kwim? Meanwhile I'm jealous that when my inlaws move into their new house, they won't have to do much to it. And also I'm aware that we'll never get most of the money back that we just put into the renovation. Which was fine when we were thinking that this was our "forever" house. But it's starting to feel like a money pit.

Anyway, I'm just wondering if anyone has been here before. Had to choose between an old house and new and chose to renovate the older one. Are you happy with the results? Did you get to a point where you did feel done? Did you go through a phase of feeling like the house was a money pit?

So you are second guessing your decision to renovate a charming older home instead of buying a new home.   And your mom is on the sidelines feeding your inner demons.   And you just might be a little bit jealous of the in-laws theoretical new house. 

Everyone who has renovated hits that point where all they think is "Dear God, why can't we be done already."     I made the decision to renovate and older home (1930s).  It took longer than planned and had some setbacks.  I hit the "get-it-done-already" phase followed by the "now what the H is holding it up" phase.   It finally did get done--at least that original renovation.  I love it.  I will never feel totally done because I keep adding new items as my tastes change and my needs change.   We have a new renovation project planned for this spring.   I think these renovation projects are just part of making this home our forever home.  I love our neighborhood and look forward to living here for many years. 

[bunnymendelbaum]

We have been renovating our 1920s house for 6 years now and while I love the house, we are finishing up projects and selling it at the end of this month.

We are going to find a lot close to downtown and build a small super modern house. (And when I say build, I mean pay someone else to build!)

I completely get the wanting it all to be done and having small kids. A big part of our decision was we were tired of spending all our time and money on a house that really wasn't "our dream". While I love our house, I never wanted to live in an old house. I'm an architect, and I've dreamed about designing my own modern house since I was little.

So when you step back and think about it, what is "your dream"? Is your current house it? Would you ever be happy in a builder basic house? That was never on the table for us really even though I've felt the same jealousy of people who live in them and don't have to do so much work on their house.

Renovations really take their toll IMO, especially stretched over years and DIY. Why don't you post some pics and we will all rave about how awesome your house is?

[bunch]

Well, I'm selling my 3 yr old custom build to buy the world's ugliest 30 yr old log cabin. I love a project. I like planning, designing and implementing. It's exciting. I totally understand being sick of renovating, but I don't think you'll regret your home when done.

[thiswillbe]

DD'd since I had somehow skipped over the *title* of your post. GL with the rest of the renovations!