Today was rough.

[verycontrary247]

I think telling my parents was the hardest part. They were extremely surprised because I never told them or mentioned us having any problems prior to this (because- in the case that we stayed together I didn't want to have my personal business out in the open) but were extremely supportive when I gave them a full run-down of everything that happened. My dad gave me his cell phone since my mom is the only one who calls him on it and told me to keep it as long as I needed.

I had a mini-panic attack when I called FIL, but he didn't answer. I'm wondering if he knows already and is avoiding me or if it was an innocent missed call.

H did not contact me in any way today. I am going to stay at our house tonight and tomorrow if he comes home I hope we can civilly talk about issues that will be addressed on the separation agreement.

Tomorrow morning I am going to contact a lawyer that was recommended to me for a free consultation.

I opened a separate bank account under only my name and moved the money I've been setting aside to repay my mom for the school loan and an extra $150. I'll need to order checks to change my direct deposit for work. Does anyone know where I can order a smaller amount of checks? I really only need 1 book but my bank has an annoyingly high minimum amount you have to order. I don't want to get a bazillion if I'm eventually going to be changing my name back.

[Gato]

Sounds like you're doing all the right things.  Hang in there!

[BlackCanary]

(((hugs)))

[goaskalice]

Will they give you some temporary checks? Maybe it's just a credit union thing, but I'm able to go in and they just print a few right there for me.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this at all.

[Deleted]

(((Hugs))). Take care of yourself.

[kaybee85]

I'm sorry

[muffin0]

Like others have said if there is anything you need, let us know.

We'll gather the troops.

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this.

*zombie hugs*

[flamingeaux]

Until you can find some I would just stop the direct deposit, and have them give your check to you in person. Not through the mail. I wonder though if the bank would be able to fax your job a paper with your routing number and acct number on it?

[verycontrary247]

Mar 20, 2013 20:31:24 GMT -5 Lucy Honeychurch said:

Considering his behavior, is it wise to meet him alone?

He's a huge coward in person, all of his crazy activity happens when I'm not around. 

However, I see your point. Problem is I'm just not sure if or when he would show up.

[Deleted]

Your bank should be able to give you a blank check for your account for direct deposit.

I'm glad you have a good support system around you ((hugs))

[thatgirl2478]

Sounds like you're taking a bunch of positive steps to improve your situation. Even though it's a shitty situation.

[verycontrary247]

Mar 20, 2013 20:49:02 GMT -5 Lucy Honeychurch said:

Mar 20, 2013 20:45:47 GMT -5 verycontrary247 said:

He's a huge coward in person, all of his crazy activity happens when I'm not around. 

However, I see your point. Problem is I'm just not sure if or when he would show up.

I mean, I'm guessing this stuff came out of nowhere, right?  Is he normally this big of an asshole?  Because that vast a break from his normal MO is really scary, unless he's been known to exhibit this kind of dick behavior before.

He has. It's been like this on and off pretty much the entire time we've been married (as the ladies of military families can probably remember). He goes through these cycles of being the ideal husband to a complete douchebag, I've just never really had the balls to pursue divorce before.

[pittsmcgee]

Good luck and I'm sorry you're going through this. It sucks.

[pedanticwench]

www.walmartchecks.com/productdetail.aspx?lineid=113&productid=1193#.UUppa1fheSo

Here is a box of checks for less than $6.

I'm so sorry you're heaving to deal with this. And I agree with LHC, meeting him alone might be a bad idea. Can you have someone, at least nearby, like parked in the street, around when he finally shows up?

[Deleted]

All you should need for direct deposit is your account number and a routing number. The bank should have no problem getting that for you.

Im sorry today what hard. Tomorrow probably won't be a cake walk either. Stay strong and take care of yourself. It will get better.

[daisyheadmaizie]

((Hugs)) hang in there.

[Deleted]

((hugs)) I think you are taking the right steps. I'm sure this isn't easy, and won't be easy, but you can get through it!

[mudslide]

((Hugs)) I'm so sorry that you're going through this.