Half Marathon-Feeling Torn and Depressed. Halp??

[shauni27]

Most of you know that I never ran until 3 years ago.  Started signing up for 5Ks and then after that I did a half.  I was hooked.  It was hard but I could feel myself improving over time.  6 months after my first half I did another and shaved 11 minutes off.  My 5K time dropped by about 6-7 minutes.  But ever since then...

running has kind of sucked.  And a lot more lately.  Like just about every run for the last 4 months has been sucky.  I cannot run 2 miles without stopping to take a breather.  2 miles!!  I feel like I cannot take one more step.  Last night on a 5 mile run, I took NINE little stops.  I cannot run hills anymore.  As in, if I do not stop to take a breather half way up even a small hill, I will certainly stop at the top and take a breather.  Last summer I was fine.  I have been running 3-4 days a week since 2011, so I am not sure what the hell is happening.

I feel like part of it is mental--at the beginning I kept running because I wanted to prove I was a runner.  Then I kept going to improve my pace.  Now that I have done those two things, and I feel like I cannot go any faster, I do not have anything to prove?

So anyway, I have done 3 halves and have another that cost me $80 in one month from today.  I got up to 10 miles 2 weeks ago (on the TM--it was actually a GREAT run--TM runs are a lot easier for me during all of this for some reason?!?!) but seriously, every other run has been awful.  Like constantly taking breaks and feeling like I cannot go any more.  Every run has me questioning why I am going to do this half marathon next month if I am so miserable and I am 99% positive that I will not improve my pace from last year (dude, how can I if I have to walk after just 2 miles?!?!)

So, do I suck it up and do 4 more weeks of running with long runs and then do the race and just say "even if this takes two and a half miserable ass shitty hours, I DID IT.  I RAN 4 HALF MARATHONS."  Or do I scrap it and say "fuck it, why do this if running is SO hard for me?"

Sorry for the whine.  I just don't understand why this is happening to me and I feel so stuck.

[Deleted]

Its funny you say that, because I am sort of in a similar place and have my first half on Sunday. My last few short (3 mile) taper runs have been brutal and I am wondering WTF I am doing. For me, I am running the half on Sunday and then going to take a mini break from running and go back to short distances and other forms of exercise (riding my bike, elliptical and bike at the gym, strength training). If you hadn't paid $80 already for your half, I would suggest you skip it, but given that you have ran a few halfs before and can obviously do the mileage, why not take a week off running right now and then see how you feel? No need to completely push yourself the next 4 weeks.

[ebeth]

it sounds like you're kind of burned out to me.

I think you need to slow down on your outside runs. if you are running with a garmin stop. or set it so you can only see the time or the home screen or the time of day. run at an easy pace.

also, get off the TM for those long runs. you aren't getting any better at hills by running on a mill.

finally, not every race is going to be a PR. you might just be plateauing. I'm in the midst of this right now. haven't PR'd at any distance since 2011. so I have different goals for races in the meantime and eventually, as I keep working, I'll break out of the plateau and PR a whole bunch and then I'll probably be stuck THERE for awhile. when you first start running you can see a lot of big gains. but it's just not possible to maintain that indefinitely.

[shauni27]

I think you guys are right--I need to change my expectations. Running IS hard, and just because I am not going as fast as I was does not mean that I suck. The body plateaus, which is normal. I think I will work through it and run the half (knowing it will be slow) and then take a serious break after that. I will try not to go balls to the walls with training over the next month, though I still want to do my long runs (and do them outside) and work on my hills and endurance. I will not beat myself up if I do not run 5 miles 4xs a week.

Thanks, all!

[kams]

(hug) (hug2)

[osulori]

It definitely sounds like you're in a slump. Some slumpbusting moves that may help-new music on your iPod if you run with one, new shoes, new running clothes, trying a different route and/or running at a different time of day. At least, these have helped me when I get in a funk. Hope you're feeling better soon!

[sassystace]

I'm sorry you are having a hard time. I've been running for about a year and a half now and starting to feel like I've leveled off in my improvements too so I get that. I read a good article in this month's Runner's World about negative self talk/mental conditioning for running and if you can get a copy of it, I'd recommend it. It made me think about what makes me stop/slow down and how your mind really controls your perception of your runs and how to train your mind along with your body to improve.

[Deleted]

I was fighting this after marathon training. I just felt slow. Running felt off. Maybe it was burn-out or maybe it was the injuries or both but unless I got my run out of the way in the morning, I'd spend all day talking myself out of doing it.

I finally left my Garmin at home.

I enjoyed running again and surprisingly, when I would take the Garmin with me, I was running faster than I thought I was and faster than I was before I left my Garmin at home. The mental "I just cannot take another stop without needing to breathe" also diminished.

I wasn't particularly excited about half in March but I was getting the excitement back for this past weekend's race and I'm looking forward to the small races this summer (if the doc says I can). I really can't wait to do more runs with lower mileage and build up a good base.

[lolobeth802]

I've been running for 14+ years and I have periods like this. To combat them I take more fun classes at the gym and trade in 2 outdoor runs for walks and do one treadmill run with intervals and inclines for about 45 min. So basically I drop down from 5-6 days of running to 1-3 days a week. I take off my watch and my headphones and run at at pace that feels comfortable and listen to the outside world. Sometimes this is for several weeks or even months. Running isn't all that... you can feel strong and healthy with other forms of it. Find some fun exercise, it will be so much more beneficial to you mentally. And enjoy! Hope this helps

[Deleted]

Also, have you tried a running group? I think that will really help me by helping me not stop running (make me mentally tough) and help me not slack (hard to slack on speed/endurance when you lose your friends). The only reason I haven't joined one is that pesky leg issue was holding me up.

[katinthehat]

another idea is after your half, take a week or two off, then start back over with a C25K type program. It's going to be something that's achievable for you, so you'll have mental boost, and you can treat it as 6-8 weeks of interval training and a time to push your pace a little bit.

[shauni27]

May 2, 2013 10:21:59 GMT -5 aswartzw said:

Also, have you tried a running group? I think that will really help me by helping me not stop running (make me mentally tough) and help me not slack (hard to slack on speed/endurance when you lose your friends). The only reason I haven't joined one is that pesky leg issue was holding me up.

I live in a really rural area, so to get to a running club I am looking at about a 45 minute drive...and then the running clubs that I HAVE found are very intense and elite runners, of which I am neither...

[emuni04]

It does sound like you're burnt out. I am sure that most of us have been there. I have been in similar situations before (signed up for a half and felt so unconfident during training but went ahead and ran it anyway since I paid the entry fee). One part of me says do it, because you paid. But the other part of me remembers how crappy I felt crossing the finish lines of a few halfs after poor training. LOL, the last one I did I CRIED throughout the last mile because I knew I did poorly and was just so pissed at myself. I certainly don't think it's wrong to say "screw it, I'm not running the race." And then give yourself some time to mentally re-charge...I like the idea PP had about maybe restarting with a C25K program. Focus on shorter distance races, and you may find that you rediscover your passion for running since it won't eat up as much time/energy as training for longer distances.

[shauni27]

I agree, after this race I am essentially going to try to "start from scratch" again and focus on 5Ks and other forms of exercise. I am just really struggling and trying to decide if I should give in to the negativity I am feeling and NOT run the half (I know I can do it, I have done it 4 other times) OR if I should push forward and persevere and show myself "fuck you, mental mind games, I CAN DO THIS!" (even knowing it will likely suck and I will be disappointed with my final time.) I think I will go with the latter, but I will also cut myself some slack if I do decide at last minute not to run it.

[ebeth]

dude. if you're all emo before the race starts about how much it's gonna suck then, yeah, it's gonna suck.

come up with a different goal besides a PR. maybe it's even splits, maybe it's negative splits, maybe it's just making it through 13 miles without telling yourself that the race sucks and you suck and your time will be disappointing. there's lots of goals you can have at a race that aren't based on your final time.

also, having done 4 halves is no guarantee you're going to finish this one. four weeks is PLENTY of time to lose fitness, especially if your longest run was 10 mi and that happened two weeks ago.

[shauni27]

May 2, 2013 12:04:03 GMT -5 ebeth said:

dude. if you're all emo before the race starts about how much it's gonna suck then, yeah, it's gonna suck.

come up with a different goal besides a PR. maybe it's even splits, maybe it's negative splits, maybe it's just making it through 13 miles without telling yourself that the race sucks and you suck and your time will be disappointing. there's lots of goals you can have at a race that aren't based on your final time.

also, having done 4 halves is no guarantee you're going to finish this one. four weeks is PLENTY of time to lose fitness, especially if your longest run was 10 mi and that happened two weeks ago.

I think you're right--I need to focus on finishing the race and being proud of that despite time.  I think I should really look at it that way right now, because, honestly, finishing the race at this point IS a big deal to me.

Also. I'm certainly not going to stop training.  I've decided to run the half, so I will keep training for it.  I have 11 on the books for this weekend, 12 for the next, then 13, then 9 on top of midweek runs.  I will stick with this, but then after the race I am going to take a serious break.

Thanks everyone for the support!

[Deleted]

I know others have said it, but it sounds like burn out to me. When I experienced this (after racing, improving speed, running a half, etc.), I switched to a local gym and did a bunch of classes with other people just to change it up. I still kept running 1 or 2 times a week, but they were short 3-4 mile runs. Only until I had a 6-9 month break was I happy to get back to running again.

[shauni27]

May 2, 2013 14:11:11 GMT -5 doglove said:

I know others have said it, but it sounds like burn out to me. When I experienced this (after racing, improving speed, running a half, etc.), I switched to a local gym and did a bunch of classes with other people just to change it up. I still kept running 1 or 2 times a week, but they were short 3-4 mile runs. Only until I had a 6-9 month break was I happy to get back to running again.

this is my EXACT plan for after the half!  and I cannot wait

[taratru]

The evening after the race are you going to regret not running? Or will you be glad you didn't? If it were me, is run because I'm a cheap ass who would feel like I wasted $80. Then I would be pissed I didn't run because even when I'm in a funk, racing is fun and it makes me happy.

[psyri]

I think it is a wise idea to adjust your expectations. I had to do that for Boston when 1) I wasn't coming back easily from an injury and 2) got injured again in the middle of training. Once I took the pressure off myself, my training started going better AND the actual race was fun. Wear something silly. Have some fun with it.

And PS, if you find it easier to run on the TM, try doing some speedwork. Try a few miles at goal pace, or slightly uncomfortably fast. You can take the thinking out of pacing yourself and learn what that pace feels like.

And PPS, I wasn't burned out, but I knew I needed a complete exercise break, followed by a running break with other exercise activities.