WTF? Dammit, dad.

[spitforspat]

As you probably know, my mom died last year. She made stained glass as a hobby. Before she died she asked me if I wanted all her tools and supplies, and I said yes. She said I could keep the stuff at my parents' house until I had a studio for it.

A couple days ago my dad calls and asks if he can give some of my mom's stained glass stuff to one of her friends. I don't want to, but I want that friend to have some things of my mom's to remember her by, so I list off some things she can take and some things I definitely want to keep.

This morning I get a text from my dad asking if he can give my mom's friend all the stuff.

NO! No no no! I'm usually a pleaser, so it's really hard for me not to give in and say OK. But, I want that stuff. I want to have the things that my mom wanted me to have, dammit.

[sawyerthedestroyer]

Ugh. No! You already said what she could take, which was really nice and you didn't have to do that. End of story.

[zitiqueen]

Then tell him no. Problem solved.

[sherbanator]

I have nothing to add, I agree with the previous posts.

[sherbanator]

I have nothing to add, I agree with the previous posts.

[vanillacourage]

So just say no. If the things have been at your parents house for a while then your dad may not understand that you really do want them.

Looking at this from your dad's perspective, is it maybe painful for him to still have these things around, and that's why he's suddenly looking to find homes for them? Maybe it is time for you to go ahead and take home what you want.

[eb777888]

May 18, 2013 10:48:09 GMT -5 @cse1960 said:

Just tell him no.

And you really have to get that stuff out of there.

Agreed!

[spitforspat]

Ok- so I called my dad and talked. He said the friend doesn't want it for sentimental reasons, but just to replenish her supplies.

That made it easier to say no. He understood and is going to tell her "sorry, no" to everything.

Thank you thank you!

[spitforspat]

I think you guys are right- it's probably time to move the stuff.

I just always want it to be in her studio. Blah!

[snickers]

I am glad he told her no to all of the stuff, I think that's the right thing to do.
I agree that it is time to move it though, I am so sorry about your mom.

[chickadee77]

Nope. Stand your ground. He's doing it to be nice, probably, but you need to be your own advocate. Thank goodness he asked you - my h's mom donated everything to a homeless shelter when his dad died, and he will be resentful forever, as well he should be.