VP was talking to me about engagement rings yesterday, for when he proposes to his GF. It is a second marriage for them both. He was thinking that because they climbed Mt Kilimanjaro together, that it would be special if he got her a tanzanite ring. His friend told him no way, girls expect diamonds. I said I think it would be really sweet and meaningful, and he knows his GF well and only he knows if she would be happy with that.
So what do you think? Would you be happy with a non-diamond engagement ring, especially is the gemstone selected had a special meaning?
Post by lightbulbsun on Jun 4, 2013 8:01:02 GMT -5
I have a sapphire ring and I love it. I know someone who has a tanzanite ring and she loves it, too. I like that mine is not a typical diamond, and I probably would have been disappointed if it was.
I agree with you- in the end only he REALLY knows if she'll love it. But I think it's an awesome idea. Diamonds are nice, but if DH thought to give me a stone that really had special meaning, that would mean SO much more to me.
The only thing about tanzanite is that it is a very soft stone and not practical for every day wear. I get why it's special in this situation, but if she wants to wear a ring every day, this isn't the stone for her.
I only say this because I wanted it or an emerald and the jeweler told me no way if I wanted to wear it every day. I ended up with a sapphire because it is as hard as a diamond and doesn't get scratched.
I have a moissanite ring and my younger sister has a sapphire ring. I think the e-ring should be about the couple not about the diamond. Your VP's friend is nuts.
I have repeatedly told SO that I explicitly do not want a diamond ring. What you described is much more meaningful and I would love something like that.
Post by fuckyourcouch on Jun 4, 2013 8:18:10 GMT -5
i would love to have something like this.
however, make sure he knows that tanzanite is significantly softer than diamonds, and may be better suited for a wedding band type setting where it would be recessed and protected better. that would be my only concern. it's certainly not fragile but several orders softer.
Post by mirandahobbes on Jun 4, 2013 8:30:40 GMT -5
I'm sentimental, so a ring that had meaning behind it would definitely work for me. I wouldn't have minded if he threw some diamonds surrounding it or something.
I wouldn't want a tanzanite engagement ring. I've had a couple of tanzanite rings, and I've never gotten more than 4 years out of them before they're pretty scratched (I've had the same experience with aquamarine). I am pretty rough on my rings (I fall pretty frequently, so they hit asphalt and concrete on a fairly regular basis) but for a ring that you're supposed to wear forever, I would be very worried about the durability.
ETA: my ring is a diamond, I've been wearing it for about three years now, and it's held up fine, even though I'm incredibly rough on rings. I've also had pretty good luck with a couple of sapphire rings.
I wouldn't want a tanzanite engagement ring. I've had a couple of tanzanite rings, and I've never gotten more than 4 years out of them before they're pretty scratched (I've had the same experience with aquamarine). I am pretty rough on my rings (I fall pretty frequently, so they hit asphalt and concrete on a fairly regular basis) but for a ring that you're supposed to wear forever, I would be very worried about the durability.
ETA: my ring is a diamond, I've been wearing it for about three years now, and it's held up fine, even though I'm incredibly rough on rings. I've also had pretty good luck with a couple of sapphire rings.
I have to ask, because I'm super curious. What are you doing that you frequently fall and land on asphalt/concrete?
I'm not a fan of non-diamond engagement rings. If the girl has said "I want ____ instead of diamond" that's one thing. But it it hasn't been discussed previously, go with diamond.
I wouldn't want a tanzanite engagement ring. I've had a couple of tanzanite rings, and I've never gotten more than 4 years out of them before they're pretty scratched (I've had the same experience with aquamarine). I am pretty rough on my rings (I fall pretty frequently, so they hit asphalt and concrete on a fairly regular basis) but for a ring that you're supposed to wear forever, I would be very worried about the durability.
ETA: my ring is a diamond, I've been wearing it for about three years now, and it's held up fine, even though I'm incredibly rough on rings. I've also had pretty good luck with a couple of sapphire rings.
I have to ask, because I'm super curious. What are you doing that you frequently fall and land on asphalt/concrete?
I'm clumsy, dislocate both knees, and was in a car wreck that tore up my right knee and ankle, so I have major ligament damage in both. It's not a good combination. And most sidewalks are concrete, and most parking lots are asphalt.
I love the idea of doing something less traditional (although in Europe, particularly England, gemstones as the center stones are obviously fairly popular).
Tanzanite is certainly a gorgeous stone. However, I agree with those who have concerns about the durability and feasibility of everyday wear.
It's a 6.5 - 7.0 on the Mohs hardness scale while a diamond is a 10 and sapphire/ruby are a 9 (just to give that perspective).
I would be leery of it as the center stone unless, perhaps, it's bezel-set to provide extra protection or as was suggested upthread, doing a band (definitely channel set) with tanzanite instead.
however, make sure he knows that tanzanite is significantly softer than diamonds, and may be better suited for a wedding band type setting where it would be recessed and protected better. that would be my only concern. it's certainly not fragile but several orders softer.
I would not like it. He is a VP at your company? Then suck it up and buy the diamond. He can get her the meaningful ring for an anniversary. It sounds like a (clever) cheap out in an engagement ring. I would feel differently if you were talking about someone who genuinely couldn't afford a diamond, but an executive can and unless his girlfriend is CLEARLY opposed, now is not the time to be creative.
I'm really soppy so if there was any sentimental reason for H to have gotten me whatever stone, that stone would win.
As it turns out I have a diamond & ruby ring, not for sentimental reasons linked with ruby but because he wanted to give me something different and had access to pigeon blood rubies at the time.
OOH OOH!!!! i know what he should do! he should ask HER.
he can propose with something else (even something cutesy like one of those rings kids get out of the machines at the grocery store) and then they can shop together. my husband picked a round solitaire for me, but just had them slap it into whatever the cheapest setting was so that we could pick out my "real" setting together. i liked both the surprise AND that i had some input.
I would not like it. He is a VP at your company? Then suck it up and buy the diamond. He can get her the meaningful ring for an anniversary. It sounds like a (clever) cheap out in an engagement ring. I would feel differently if you were talking about someone who genuinely couldn't afford a diamond, but an executive can and unless his girlfriend is CLEARLY opposed, now is not the time to be creative.
Just for the record, a nice quality tanzanite is not going to be cheap. Maybe slightly less than a diamond, but the good color ones are still rare.
I'd suggest a diamond engagement ring with a surprise tanzanite in the band