Is learning big things through FB the norm?

[snickers]

That's the norm with H's family at least. It drives me nuts!

[ElizabethBennet]

Yep. We just had it happen this week actually.

I would not have called my cousins to tell them I was expecting. Unless we were super close. I would just assume they would have heard it through other family.

[nomad100]

I found out about all my cousins' pregnancies except one via FB. My mum told me about that one.

But we aren't close. So I probably wouldn't have found out until I saw them in person.

[eddy]

I called our parents and siblings emailed my BFFs and everyone else found out through facebook. Well I am sure we told our friends in town in person, but the people who don't live here were emailed. I hate talking on the phone.

I don't have time to call everyone individually for something like a pregnancy. People might clutch their pearls about that, but whatever.

I think it is the norm when you are not in the inner most circle. I certainly didn't call my cousins.

[stephlove]

My parents call me if a relative passes away, but other than that... everything is through facebook or text. I don't mind finding out that way. When I have news, I call my parents and my sister, but everyone else finds out through social media. 21st century and all that.

[Deleted]

I've announced all major life news (moving, death of one dog and birth of another, promotion at work) through Facebook. We called our parents, then posted. I see nothing wrong with it. I think it is efficient. If someone wants to chat or has questions they can PM.

[rupertpenny]

It would never occur to me to call my cousins to tell them I'm pregnant. Or any other big news.

But I also don't really put anything on facebook. I just choose to remain mysterious.

[wambam]

My childhood best friend came out on FB before she told me. I found that a tinge annoying.

[littlesthobo]

Telling people I was pregnant was the WORST. I hated it. I'm all about e-mail/FB.

I've received "big news" on FB and I don't mind as long as it's a personal message to me. I get annoyed if I only find out because someone else posts something on the person's wall.

ETA: I'm okay with a "We're expecting!" status.  It's just when they've obviously told other people and not me that I get annoyed. lol

[agnes]

I got a call from my closest cousin when she was pregnant. I wouldn't expect it, though. Especially from any of my other cousins.

[ECB]

Well, it's becoming the norm! That's for sure. When we use texting and social media for everything else, then yes, important family news is eventually going to follow suit.

I WOULD hope that in most situations, though, that someone dying would be handled w/ a little more care. Happy news is one thing.Sad news - entirely another.

[littlesthobo]

Jun 7, 2013 10:10:26 GMT -5 ECB said:

I WOULD hope that in most situations, though, that someone dying would be handled w/ a little more care. Happy news is one thing.Sad news - entirely another.

Yes!  I had to delete a family member because they're constantly posting about deaths in the family.  One day I log in to find the status "We're so sad that (uncle's name) has passed away" and I flipped the fuck out only to find that it was not my uncle, just someone with the same name.  BOUNDARIES, people!!!

[EmilieMadison]

I think it's becoming pretty common. And maybe even a year ago I would have said it was too bad, personal interaction, blah blah. But this is how technology is changing our daily lives. I'd hope that I would still get a phone call (or an in-person) announcement from a close family member or very close friend, but for "the rest" of the people in my life, I think it makes the most sense to announce things via social media. I'm ok with that.

FWIW, I had only just opened a FB account when I got pg with DS and I didnt really use it much at that point. I think I probably mentioned being pregnant, but it wasn't an "announcement", because I had already told everyone.

[cheeseandcrackers]

i wouldn't really expect a cousin to call me up and tell me the news to be honest

[trafficgirl]

Jun 7, 2013 10:15:43 GMT -5 @tambcat said:

Jun 7, 2013 10:08:49 GMT -5 littlesthobo said:

Telling people I was pregnant was the WORST. I hated it. I'm all about e-mail/FB.

It IS a pretty awkward thing to announce in person.

I agree it's a little awkward, but so far telling people in person and seeing their reaction has been the best part for me.  I seriously love seeing their faces and was bummed I didn't get to tell my whole extended family in person.

As for the OP, I asked my (girl) cousins and aunt to lunch specifically to tell them I was pregnant, but I'm pretty close to them. The rest of my extended family I emailed all at once. Other cousins I'm not as close to will find out on FB once we put it on there.

Has your cousin called to tell you about news in the past? I think an email might have been nice, but calling a bunch of people about big news is time consuming. Though I agree w/ PPs about sad news - in my mind that warrants a phone call.

[sporky]

I found out my "BFF" was pregnant on facebook. Personally, I think having to get big news like that via facebook is kinda shitty if these people are supposed to be close to you.

[papie]

Only with people that I am not super close to.  My close cousins and I all made sure to call each other about our pregnancies before announcing on FB.  But I found out about miscarriages/illnesses/deaths through FB, especially with people that I don't speak to regularly. 

[coribelle26]

I don't think it's a big deal for a cousin. We found out that H's best friend and his wife were having a baby through facebook and were kind of miffed, until we heard that that's how his parents found out, too, and felt worse for them (lol). When my best friend got engaged, she called her parents, then her sister, then me, then put it on facebook. I felt like that was reasonable.

I found out on here that I was weird for thinking that, if I ever get pregnant, I wouldn't do a post on facebook solely to announce the pregnancy, so my barometer for normal might be off.

[Alyssa]

Jun 7, 2013 10:49:59 GMT -5 cheeseandcrackers said:

i wouldn't really expect a cousin to call me up and tell me the news to be honest

Same here.  I didn't grow up near my relatives, we saw them maybe once a year if we were lucky and that was only for a day or so.

I've actually gotten to know them more thanks to FB but we never talk on the phone.  One of them moved about 45 minutes from me.  We are so distant, have nothing in common, barely have any history to hold onto that I haven't even seen her and her family in over a year.

[mommytutu]

Jun 7, 2013 9:59:47 GMT -5 sameoldash said:

i found out my dad died bc my distant cousin sent me a message expressing his deepest condolences. lol so yes.

I'm sorry. That must have been hard.

[lurkergirl123]

I found out my grandma died via text. I found out my brother was in the hospital via Facebook.

My family sucks.