Why am I so bitter this week??

[emma245]

I have no idea but I have felt really really weird this week. Ive been divorced for almost 1.5 years and Im having all kinds of crazy emotions about missing my old house and dogs and even my EXH.

I know our relationship was wrong but I miss the comfortableness of some things. I think part of it is in my current relationship my BF doesnt really get my sarcasm or humor like my EXH did. I feel like Im comparing these relationships and keep just getting upset. Ugh.

I just wonder if I'll ever have the same type of relationship again......(as in the good parts of course)

[doriswe]

Why are you in a relationship with someone who doesn't get you? (no snark intended!)

[emma245]

I think A LOT of people dont get my humor. Usually he does but we definitely dont have the connection that EXH and I shared in terms of inside jokes, bantering, etc.

[doriswe]

Jun 13, 2012 12:24:11 GMT -5 emma245 said:

I think A LOT of people dont get my humor. Usually he does but we definitely dont have the connection that EXH and I shared in terms of inside jokes, bantering, etc.

I tend to have an odd sense of humor, but I still find people who get it and can provide that type of banter. I'll give you, I miss some of the inside jokes I had with XH, but I'm sure I'll make new ones with the right guy when he comes along.

[bullygirl979]

No offense, Emma but it sounds like your current SO isn't really measuring up. Why are you keeping him around?

I agree with Doris. I have an offbeat sense of humor too, but I am not going to be with someone who doesn't appreciate and get that.

[wrathofkuus]

This is the misogynist boyfriend who told you that you'd make a bad mother and that he was sorry you couldn't be a SAHM?

[gozf]

Jun 13, 2012 13:06:12 GMT -5 wrathofkuus said:

This is the misogynist boyfriend who told you that you'd make a bad mother and that he was sorry you couldn't be a SAHM?

How do you remember everything?! It's quite impressive!

[BlueBayou]

Jun 13, 2012 13:06:12 GMT -5 wrathofkuus said:

This is the misogynist boyfriend who told you that you'd make a bad mother and that he was sorry you couldn't be a SAHM?

:Y: :Y: Thank you this was my thought too!!! Perhaps you are not where you want to be right now which makes you look at all of it. Maybe those little comments he has made are chipping away at your happiness.

[emma245]

Yes same boyfriend. We had a very LENGTHY discussion about that issue. He has apologized numerous times and I think Ive moved past it. Im not going to lie and say Im completely over it.

It is definitely not a perfect relationship by any means but we are working on it. I just dont know if something like getting my sense of humor every single time means we arent compatible.

EXH and I were compatible in that way but not compatible in 10,000 other ways..

[jade28]

I don't know, I have come to learn that someone getting my sense of humor and just "getting me" is so important. My ex and I never had that. He didn't find me very funny and hated the faces I would make or my singing. Yeah I am goofy.

Now having more dating experience, I need that in a guy. It's how I click with someone and feel connected to someone and feel appreciated. Of course everyone has different needs for a relationship but you may want to evaluate if this is something you need to feel fulfilled and happy in a relationship.

[BlueBayou]

Could you be expecting/wanting your current relationship to be farther along than it is?

[letyourselfgo]

I'm wondering about that too.

[achase123]

1.5 years is awhile in the grand scheme of things. How soon did you get into a relationship post divorce? Maybe you haven't given yourself enough time to properly heal. Are you afraid to be alone? I'm also not clear why you'd want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't get you.

[gozf]

It sounds like maybe this relationship has run its course.

[liubotflittyfud]

Jun 13, 2012 13:32:40 GMT -5 jade28 said:

I don't know, I have come to learn that someone getting my sense of humor and just "getting me" is so important. My ex and I never had that. He didn't find me very funny and hated the faces I would make or my singing. Yeah I am goofy.

Now having more dating experience, I need that in a guy. It's how I click with someone and feel connected to someone and feel appreciated. Of course everyone has different needs for a relationship but you may want to evaluate if this is something you need to feel fulfilled and happy in a relationship.

This times a million. I know I'm not the go-to for relationship advice, but if someone doesn't "get you" then he won't ever get you. Get it? STBXH didn't think I was funny, but xBF did...but xBF didn't get my silly dancing in the kitchen or other wacky stuff I do on the regular. I've learned that if they don't know YOU and all of your sides and embrace them, you just won't click in all the right places. Good luck!

[blackkitty]

Well for me I had a similar timeline in that I was so ECSTATIC to be away from him the first year or so that the negative emotions and sadness about the divorced didn't really kick in until like a year to a year and a half after I left.

[heavenly]

Jun 13, 2012 13:10:36 GMT -5 BlueBayou said:

Jun 13, 2012 13:06:12 GMT -5 wrathofkuus said:

This is the misogynist boyfriend who told you that you'd make a bad mother and that he was sorry you couldn't be a SAHM?

Thank you this was my thought too!!! Perhaps you are not where you want to be right now which makes you look at all of it. Maybe those little comments he has made are chipping away at your happiness.

I agree with this, it is like your body/emotions are trying to tell you something.

[stephbfan]

Jun 13, 2012 13:40:14 GMT -5 achase123 said:

1.5 years is awhile in the grand scheme of things. How soon did you get into a relationship post divorce? Maybe you haven't given yourself enough time to properly heal. Are you afraid to be alone? I'm also not clear why you'd want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't get you.

:Y: :Y: