To the moms with 3+

[Nenibay]

DH and I have always wanted a big family. We originally thought 4 kids but may be leaning towards 3 now. We currently have a 3yo and an 11 mo old. DH really wants to have a 3rd now and I'm on the fence. Mostly, I don't have good sleepers so I'm dreading another 18 mo of not sleeping through the night. However, I know I so want more, so I'm debating whether to kind of get the rough stages behind me (I know that sounds a bit harsh).
So, my questions for any moms of 3+....
any advantages to having at least one in school? Is there much difference between a 2 yr gap and 3yr gap in terms of work?
Just hoping some personal experiences may enlighten me a bit!

[Deleted]

I have 3 kiddos. DD1 is just shy of 6, DD2 is 3 1/2 and DD3 is 4 1/2 months. I would say it has been far easier transitioning from 2 to 3 than 1 to 2. It helps that DD3 is such a good baby, too. She is a good sleeper, good eater and a happy baby. The older girls are great with her. 

In contrast, when DD2 was born, DD1 was a hot mess about it. It was a difficult transition, for sure.

i think 2 1/2 years is the perfect spacing. Not too far apart they have nothing in common. Not too close that they are too into the same things. 

[Deleted]

I get what you mean about wanting to get the baby stage over with. We have three kids who are 20 and 25 months apart. It was hard in the beginning when DD was born because she was colicky. But once we got through that and she started sleeping better at night, it got a lot easier.

Now that they are almost five, three, and nearly one it is pretty much smooth sailing. The boys go to school and now summer camp in the mornings, which gives me one-on-one time with DD, and then I have a sitter who comes over in the afternoons to watch her so I can take them to their activities and to places like the zoo. Sometimes I think about having a fourth, but honestly at this point I don't want to start over with a newborn. We're really looking forward to the kids getting a bit older and being able to do some more traveling/longer plane rides with them. The two year age gap has worked out well for us.

[cc]

I have a huge gap between number 2 and 3. (7 years) there is a 10 year gap between number 1 and 3. Now that LO is a toddler it is hard taking her to the older two's school functions. LO wants to run around and not sit. So, that can be hard. At some point, I will have a kid in high school, a kid in middle school, and a kid in elementary school. That will be fun trying to keep track of their schedules. Lol

I sometimes wish I had them closer together but circumstances weren't right. I will say that the three year gap between the older two was/is very manageable.

[Kristinmo]

Do you work? We may decide to have a 3rd but we will wait until DS is in school because daycare for 3 is cost prohibitive for us.

[my4girls]

we have three currently. 3 years between the first 2, 2 years between the 2nd 2. I don't really think that there was TOO much of a difference. I do have good sleepers though so that helps a lot. 3 years was nice because dd1 was pretty self suffcient with a lot of things but honestly 2 years was not really bad, now 3 and 4 will only be 18 months apart- that might have been tearing my hair out!

I will say that going from 2 to 3 was by far the easist transition we made. DD3 just sort of slipped right into our family with no problems, it was like she was always there

[mommytutu]

I'm still in the early stages of life with 3. So far so good. The sleep deprivation is a little rough but I know it won't last forever. My girls sleep very good so that does help. The hardest kid right now is my 2 year old. She has a mind of her own!

Logistically restaurants are harder so we go out earlier. We ended up getting a mini can which is fantastic. I like the age difference and think if we would have waited we would have stayed with only 2.

That said DHis getting snipped this week

ETA mine are 4, 2, and 6 weeks

[bittybomb]

We have three. Our oldest (boy) will be 5 in 2 weeks, our middle (girl) is 2 years 7 months and the baby (boy) is 16 months old. There are 2 years, 3 months between the first two, and 15 and a half months between number 2 and 3. I love it. Don't get me wrong, it is sometimes crazy and chaotic, but really they love playing (and fighting!) with each other. Mine are all great sleepers. My oldest just finished full-time pre-k, but he really is such a great help with the other two. I think it was more rough for us to go from 2 to 3 initially, but I think that's because of how close in age 2 and 3 are, and my daughter was really still very much a baby herself when her baby brother came along. He was a surprise (though a welcome surprise). Now I find that as everyone is getting a little bit older, it is getting much easier.

[volcanoboom]

I have 3. When DD2 was born DD1 turned 3 a month later, it was such an easy transition. I know most people say going from 1 to 2 is the hardest, but for me 2 to 3 was much harder. DD2 turned 2 the day after DD3 was born. I feel like the 3 year age difference was so much easier for me.
I think you also have to take into account that the 3rd time around I ended up with some post partum depression and anxiety and I'd never had that before. DD3 is only 7 months and I'm now separated from my H, so I think all of that stress made it harder, it wouldn't have been such a difficult transition without all of that.

[StormyDixon]

we have 6, I would be happy to answer your specific questions

[Deleted]

We have 3 girls, 20 mnths and 28 mnths apart - 5yr, 3.5yr and 14mnth old. The infant stage was rough with three at first with sleep deprivation and DD3 had reflux, but now it's a lot easier as they all have great sleep schedules, we are able to go out to dinner and are just better able to manage them now that DD3 is older. Soooo wish we could've skipped the newborn stage too, lol DD1 and DD2 get a long really well and are very close, and they both love DD3. I like that they will be 2 yrs apart in school, although paying for college will be strung out over 8 yrs, ha!

[darthnbjenni]

We have a 5.5 year old, two 4.5 year olds and a 1.5 year old. And I would say things have just now started to calm down now that no one is in the baby stage.

[chchchia]

I have 5..2 sets of irish twins and an older one. After 3, it is easy peasy..lol. Did you really think you were going to get a full night's slep for the next 18 years, let alone 18 months? HA.

[lolobeth802]

I have 3. Honestly, it doesn't get any easier, just different as they get older. School aged needs are really involved and take up so much of our time. Homework, activities, social life, etc etc. It is however, easier to get away and get time to ourselves than when they were all little. Someone posted on here(or somewhere) that when they are less a child or two, they suddenly "see" their other child. Like, oh there you are, i like you! It's so true, one on one time is when I really like and get to know each of my children. I'm otherwise distracted and constantly dividing my parenting. But at the same time, the house is always full and I never feel lonely within my family. So of course I wouldn't change it, and I realize this wasn't what you were asking, but I do wonder sometimes what even one child would be like!!

[textbookcase]

I have 3. The first two are 2.5 years apart. I like how they are close together, they are bffs. #3 is 17 months old. There is a 5 year gap between #2 and #3. I like having older kids with a baby, too, because they are a big help (especially my 9yo) with the baby. I was nervous that Bonnie would also be a horrible sleeper like her big sisters. Neither of them slept well and were both colicky, so I was scared she would be the same way but she wasn't at all. She was my easiest baby...a breeze! Things are a bit harder now that she's a toddler and into everything. I homeschool, so things are kind of crazy around the house most of the time. I do want one more baby, and I would like to get pregnant this fall.