Update on Adam's Behavior/school meeting

[musiclover]

katie- Thanks for asking (heart)

So we finally connected at school today for a short informal meeting between myself, Adam's main teacher and the Director of his program.  It went so well.

They both assured me that Adam is a very sweet boy that is kind to everyone, makes friends easily, is not agressive or mean, and is very smart.  Adam's main issue is that in the afternoon he tends to get quite silly and ends up being the class clown and likes to put on "shows", this often leads to him not listening well at those times. He does well in the morning and during rest time (even though he has not napped since he was 2, he just reads at nap time).

Anyhow, his teacher said that she has come with a "relaxation box" that she will bring out whenever she can see that he is getting too revved up with sillyness.  She will kindly remove him from the group and just nicely have him calm down in a quiet part of the classroom.  She said that this box will contain puzzles, stress balls, books etc..  If it comes down to it she will take one of the partition walls form the Kindergarten room and put that up next to him to give him more of a private nook.  She appreciates that we do a reward chart at home and does remind him of his goal throughout the day.  She also said that she would be more clear at the end of each day exactly how his day was compared to the last, it's been hard for me to gauge the progress lately even though they said he has been better overall.

He's been great at home, his main two tough times of the day are getting dressed for school (he stalls and acts silly), and getting dressed for bed (he stalls and acts silly).  Otherwise he is doing so well.  My SIL sat for us last weekend and said he was perfect.  He'll be 5yrs old in 4 months, so I hope he will keep maturing.

I did cry in front of them this morning, ugh. I take this all very seriously and it means so much to me that they care so much to come up with an action plan for him and will go out of their way to help him work on this challenge, I just want nothing more than to have my kids care about learning and to respect their teachers.

I am happy with how things are going with him!!

The one thing I will say to people like @sprinkles who are currently dealing with a challenging child is to stay strong, as they age and mature it will get better, you just have to put your time in and they will come out of it better people.  I can say that now as we are on the other side of it.

[spaghetticat]

I'm so lad to hear things are going well. I've said it before, but I will say it again: you are doing a great job!

[katfco]

I'm so glad you have people in his life who are so willing to help him and who seem to understand him. It sounds like they have a great plan in place.

[Deleted]

SOO glad to hear this!!!! What an awesome daycare, and awesome teacher he has. You can tell she really cares about his well-being, and WANTS him to succeed. I would have totally cried too!!! I'm SURE his silliness will diminish as he gets older, as it seems to be doing. I'm just so happy to hear this!

And thanks so much. We're still having a really rough time with things. It puts a big damper on our marriage at times because we both have different ideas on how to help him or how to handle it. But we're trying. I know it'll get better, but its hard in the now. We are currently struggling with horrible separation anxiety of some kind. He only wants me, and will scream bloody murder if DH even goes near him sometimes. Its really hard on us, especially DH. Ugh. Anyway, this isnt about me, lol. I really appreciate your posts about this, I always look forward to hearing what you have to say!!!!!

[musiclover]

Jun 26, 2013 11:16:40 GMT -5 @sprinkles said:

SOO glad to hear this!!!! What an awesome daycare, and awesome teacher he has. You can tell she really cares about his well-being, and WANTS him to succeed. I would have totally cried too!!! I'm SURE his silliness will diminish as he gets older, as it seems to be doing. I'm just so happy to hear this!

And thanks so much. We're still having a really rough time with things. It puts a big damper on our marriage at times because we both have different ideas on how to help him or how to handle it. But we're trying. I know it'll get better, but its hard in the now. We are currently struggling with horrible separation anxiety of some kind. He only wants me, and will scream bloody murder if DH even goes near him sometimes. Its really hard on us, especially DH. Ugh. Anyway, this isnt about me, lol. I really appreciate your posts about this, I always look forward to hearing what you have to say!!!!!

I've been there, so I get the pain and stress this can cause.  When Adam was in the midst of the worst of it, DH and I would get so angry, stressed and sad in general that it did cause some tough days in our home.  It's not easy when a child is acting up for whatever reason and you can't "fix" it.  You often think that it must be you and your parenting, but it's not.  Some children are just born a little tougher (personality wise)than others. The Best thing you can do it talk it over and make sure you take a unified stand on it, you need to be on the same page and that it not always easy.  Also, it's so helpful to find a friend or two that you can vent to that will not judge you for your feelings, because you will find that so many people go through this too.  You kick ass, lady, he will come around soon.

[charlielove]

It must be so comforting to know Adam is in such a loving environment not only at home, but at school as well. You are all doing a great job with finding the best ways to deal with his silliness, and I know that is definitely not easy.

[nannerl]

Thumbs wayyyyy up lady! I'm so glad that you are seeing positive outcomes for all of your efforts, and how wonderful that Adam is making such great strides!

[Faevantastic]

It's so refreshing to hear that the school cares so much about him! Not meaning to get sappy for a moment, but musiclover - you are such an amazing mom. You are an inspiration to me!

[chasbride07]

That is all so wonderful! I know these sorts of things are not easy to deal with. Great job to you and his teachers - I love the idea of the "relaxation box".

[monkeybabe]

This is so good to hear! I agree with everything the other ladies are saying. <3

[devonpow]

I'm glad to hear it went well! And don't worry about crying, I totally cried a bit the other day while meeting with the literacy specialist at H's school, but in a good way. It's hard not to cry while discussing challenges and successes with your kid, especially when talking to the people who are helping them succeed 

[raynes]

I'm so glad to hear that things are going better. It's really awesome that he's got such awesome and attentive parents and teachers.

[thedahliharpa]

It sounds like a great meeting. Adam, his parents, and teachers are a good team.

i may steal that box idea for home.

[musiclover]

Thanks for all of the kind words, ladies. If anything, I hope this info. might help one of you someday with a spirited child.

Parenting has its ups and downs for sure, but I just keep my focus on building his foundation for now, and then he will hopefully flourish as an adult.

I am just soo damn happy that his teacher told me that she just wants him to succeed, it made me so emotional that they care so much about his progress. Yay for having people in his life that want the best for him.

[skiesthelimit]

I'm so glad he has such a great teacher and it sounds like they have a great plan. Good job momma!

[carawestt]

That's awesome, musiclover! I think it's so great that he's in an environment where people truly care about him and are willing to work with him. And you are an amazing mom!

[laurack]

I love how serious they take this! they obviously care a lot about him which is just so great.

And great job to you guys for doing such a top notch parenting job!

[ruby412]

This is wonderful!! Adam is very lucky to have such an involved and loving mama and teacher!!

[bean47]

What a great team Adam has to help him succeed at home and school! I love that they are going to try the quiet box with him. I recommend something similar in our preschool classrooms for kids with sensory needs and some of our teachers have had good success using it with non sensory kids; I hope it helps Adam!

[twirlermom]

That is great the teachers are working with you! I am glad things seem to be getting better. I am praying for an easier time with DD1 soon. She is such a sweet girl, she just makes some very bad decisions some times! Makes for some very difficult times at home for sure!

[katie]

I am so glad to hear he is doing so good! You are doing a great job and I am so impressed with his DC. It's such a nice feeling when you know your child is getting such good care. Yay Adam, musiclover and daycare!