XP: Can I get some advice?

[sunshineray]

Sorry for the cut and paste link but this is the best I could figure out on the app.

pandce.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=42&action=display&thread=202599

[SKP82]

Can you ever trust him again? He's lied to you and crossed so many boundaries in your relationship, I wonder if you can ever get back to a place where you believe he won't do those things anymore. I sure as hell couldn't.

[kaybee85]

I really think you need to check out survivinginfidelity.com if you haven't yet

[Deleted]

Honestly, it kind of seems like he's suddenly interested in counselling because he's hoping you will stop asking him if he's cheating, which I think he is.

[lime]

This is NOT NORMAL. NOT NORMAL or healthy. Not at all.

There is no solution other than leaving, cutting your sister off and seeking counseling.

I'm sorry you are still dealing with this. I wish you the best, but you need to take the first steps to leave.

[underwaterrhymes]

I don't think you can save this marriage.

This obviously bothers you. It's okay that it bothers you now even if it didn't bother you before. It's okay to change your mind. That is your right and your husband is a fucking dick to cheat on you and then turn around and make you feel as though you're violating some sort of promise.

You are worth so much more than this.

[sneetch]

You are married to a vile human being. I hope you realize that you deserve better than this.

[mellymel]

Seriously? You need to leave him. He sounds like such a jackass.

[kcr1972]

I honestly feel that he is grooming you to see just how much he can get away with. If I remember correctly you are the one who had problems with your husband and sister as well...now this. He is manipulating you by offering counseling on his terms. Please for your sanity and safety walk away now. This won't turn out good.

ETA I'm so sorry you are going through this. I was in a similar situation and it was extremely hard to realize I deserved better.

[lola]

Divorce him. This is the only advice I have for you.

[snickers]

I'm sorry but I think he is a lair.

[sparkythelawyer]

You know the answer here. You just don't want it to be the answer here.

[margotmacomber]

You can not be serious about trying to stay in a relationship like this.  CAN NOT BE.  Imma need to talk to your sister right about now.  (not the sexting one, the other one)

[Deleted]

You've gotten some great advice, on both boards, for your situation and for yourself. It would serve you well to heed it and find the strength to say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH and move on.
Good luck.

[elleblue]

I posted on the other thread, but I wanted to say this too so I'll say it here. I think you know what you need to do sunshineray - all this asking for advice sounds more like you're just looking for validations of your feelings. Trust, you won't find anyone here who would be okay with what your H has been doing were they in your place. You are completely justified for feeling hurt, angry and over it and ready to end this relationship. Don't let him guilt you into feeling like you're the one who has done something wrong. If you really listen to yourself, you'll find you know the answer already. I think perhaps it's time to move on to asking some practical advice as to how exactly to manage leaving him. I know everyone here will support you and give you some great advice on how to handle things from here on out.

[livinitup]

Well, what do you want to do?

[Deleted]

Time to walk honey.

[Ohhmm(bligo)]

I need to see some pictures of this guy. How is it that a man can continually lie, cheat, and hit on all the women around, try to get his wife to swing and then pout when she won't, AND get both his wife's sister and her friend to sleep with/exchange nude pictures with?
How hot is he, and how big is he? Because it can't be his sparkling personality.

[margotmacomber]

Jul 17, 2013 21:07:49 GMT -5 Ohhmm(bligo) said:

I need to see some pictures of this guy. How is it that a man can continually lie, cheat, and hit on all the women around, try to get his wife to swing and then pout when she won't, AND get both his wife's sister and her friend to sleep with/exchange nude pictures with?
How hot is he, and how big is he? Because it can't be his sparkling personality.

Maybe ask her sister?  I'm just sayin!  

It's out of the realm of my thinking.  I'm ready to give DH is walking orders for not doing enough around the house. This shit is a whole different level.

[Ohhmm(bligo)]

Jul 17, 2013 21:13:15 GMT -5 margotmacomber said:

Jul 17, 2013 21:07:49 GMT -5 Ohhmm(bligo) said:

I need to see some pictures of this guy. How is it that a man can continually lie, cheat, and hit on all the women around, try to get his wife to swing and then pout when she won't, AND get both his wife's sister and her friend to sleep with/exchange nude pictures with?
How hot is he, and how big is he? Because it can't be his sparkling personality.

Maybe ask her sister?  I'm just sayin!  

It's out of the realm of my thinking.  I'm ready to give DH is walking orders for not doing enough around the house. This shit is a whole different level.

That is true.  I'm sure I could get a peek if I asked.

(PS - no thank you, man.)

[TrickyBob]

Drop the skeevy husband. Drop the skeevy sister. Drop the skeevy friend.

Why do you want to be married to a man who plays you like a fiddle and doesn't find it a big deal to trade nudie pictures with your sister, you friend, and probably many more. I also wouldn't believe his remorse over this situation, he doesn't care or else he wouldn't be doing it with every available female around him.

[margotmacomber]

Jul 17, 2013 21:21:36 GMT -5 @starflower22 said:

How does he have a neverending supply of women willing to trade naked pictures?? Why are your friends so horrible? My advice is the same as its been - he is a disgusting person and you need to get far far away from him.

[ooglie26]

I believe you know it is time to move on.  He's playing with your emotions, making you second guess how you feel about all of the things he's done and/or lied about.  He continues to prove time and time again that he won't be honest with you, unless it is his last resort.  He's a grown man playing little boy games.

Personally speaking, there is no way that trust could be repaired and rebuilt with a man who places so little value on our relationship, or my feelings.  You deserve so much better from life and from a relationship. 

Please take care of yourself right now, get to a doctor and get tested.  I still don't think he's being entirely truthful with you about where he's been/what he has done and with whom. 

[sparkythelawyer]

Jul 17, 2013 21:41:35 GMT -5 HRH Queen Dick I, Orphan said:

Wuv you

[10nille]

Delete the naked photos of yourself before you kick him out. In case you missed it the first ten times he lied the guy isn't trustworthy. It's almost better to think this is MUD than a woman so desperate she keeps this man and needs the whole internet to tell her it's a bad idea. Hope the child is MUD, too.

[W.T.Faulkner]

Damn. Catfish are really ugly.