At least I made it about me.

[VeryViolet]

I think it is totally normal to make other people's fertility stuff about you particularly when you are struggling. What would make you a shitty person would be unloading it to her. Bitching to us is a fine outlet. I am sorry you are going through this and I hope that it all works out soon. ((hugs))

[LLL]

You didn't make it all about you. Don't be so hard on yourself

[sonrisa]

Sept 26, 2013 9:39:33 GMT -5 @astrid said:

I'm a shitty person for making this about me and will obviously never bring it up, but I hate all of it.

It's okay if your inner monologue is a bit self centered. It's *your* inner monologue. "Making it all about you" is when you let that leak out into the world when talking to your mom, brother or SIL. 

[Deleted]

Don't be so hard on yourself. You are hurting in such a hard way and your SIL's pregnancies/miscarriages reminded you of that hurt. You are not "making this about you." You clearly still want them to be happy and also hurt for them for what they are going through. None of that makes you selfish or awful.

[Deleted]

you know, you are not a shitty person at all. you didn't make this all about you TO YOUR SIL.

kristinKD had the exact same due date i would've had if i hadn't had a miscarriage. while this is the first time i'm writing it here, i thought about every time she posted and eventually turned off all signatures so i didn't have to see her ticker. i don't think that makes me a shitty person. it made me a person who didn't want to make her pregnancy all about me, and found my own way around it. likewise, you naturally took something that is related to your own struggles and reflected upon them. internally. and then you posted about it on an anonymous message board. that's as far away as making it all about you as i can think.

i'm sorry that you're going through this.

[sergey]

Just because their situation is bringing up your feelings about your own doesn't mean you're making their tragedy all about you. You're not being insensitive or hurtful towards them, you're commiserating. I'm sorry you're going through this and I hope you're both parents in the near future.

[rex]

You're allowed to feel this way. You're not making it all about you.

It took me almost a year after my second miscarriage to get pregnant again. It was very, very hard on me. I had a hard time when I heard about people's pregnancies or babies being born when my due dates were.

I'm sorry you have to go through all of this. It's not fair and it's really hard.

[viciouskittie]

I'm in a pretty similar situation. I have two younger sisters who seem to get pregnant from thinking about it and DW and I are struggling. As much as I love my sisters and their children, it can be hard on me sometimes. To boot I am a total control freak and it's hard having no control and not knowing when things will work out. Hang in there, you're not alone in your feelings and you're definitely not a shitty person.

[Sloane]

We tried for over 3 years to start our family, having problems is no joke and it's really normal to feel the way you are. I usually just withdrew for a bit if there was stuff I couldn't handle or I knew I would have trouble being there for someone until I dealt with my own feelings. (((hugs)))

[Jalapeñomel]

(((Hugs))) TTC is so hard for so many people, especially if you suffer a loss.

[game blouses]

You're not a shitty person. It's hard to say what will trigger those feelings, and you are entitled to them.

[karenj]

I totally get where you are coming from. I always said one of the worst days of my life was when we were trying to get pregnant. I started my period that morning (always sucky), my youngest sister tracked me down at the laundry mat to tell me my other sister had her baby, on the way to the parking lot she told me she was pregnant and that afternoon was my SIL baby shower. Ugh. I was so happy for all of them but it was a little much at the time.

Some days it just hits you upside the head and it hurts. Wishing you and your dh all the fertility vibes I can send.