::deep breath:: for the first time....

[fussbucket]

... I have deleted an email from my mom in my Inbox before reading it.

This is kind of a big deal for me.

I'd like a vote below: Is your mom naughty, or nice? Tell me.

[pinkplasticdoll]

She is awful. I dont even listen to her voicemails so reading an email from her obviously doesn't happen either. But we all know about my mom.

[fussbucket]

This makes me feel better! Thank you!!! <3

[loveablesarah]

Mostly nice. She doesn't take any shit from anybody and I really admire that about her.

[exploding people]

My mom is awesome.

[interro]

Good job fuss. That's very strong! My mom is well meaning and mostly nice. She is overbearing and can drive me crazy though.

[Deleted]

Good for you...
My mom is gone and i wish i could get another call from her!

[BettyBookWorm]

:Y:

Good Job Fuss!

[flamingeaux]

Good job. Baby fuss needs a sane, happy mama.
also my mom bounces back and forth between awesome and insane.

[Deleted]

Last year during one of her verbal rampages I saved nearly 200 voice mails from a 3 week period in case I needed them as evidence. I did a pretty good job of not listening to them, but the few tidbits I did hear accused me of stealing her stuff and giving it to H's family, telling me to tell my son that she was dead, and a bizarre misinterpretation of my husband doing dishes meaning he was cheating on me.

They ranged from 3-5 minutes long each....

You are not alone.

[MixedBerryJam]

I wouldn't define my mother as naughty or nice, but she is The. Most. Self. Centered. person on the face of the planet. My birthday isn't "my" birthday -- it's the day she gave birth to me. When my husband was diagnosed with cancer, her response was "I had cancer too, remember? And I'm fine now." She needs to have her opinion validated on everything, from the way I wear my hair to the way I raise my kids. If I mention a coworker, she wants to know the name, because she worked at the same organization 20 years ago and might know the person. When I'm challenged by one of my (very challenging) teenagers, she reminds me that she had a very challenging teenager, too, and he's fine now. Just once, I'd like any conversation I have with her to be about whatever we're actually talking about, and not how she fits into it. It is exhausting to deal with, but thankfully (?) it's not done with malice.

And if I were to delete an email without reading it, she would resend it with a forward, "Not sure if I sent this to you already ..." because I have to respond to every fricking email she sends.

May I join your club?

[bowies]

There were a number of years where I could definitively say my mom was my best friend. There were also some trying years. I went a year without speaking to either one of my parents (2007 if I remember correctly). I've pretty much accepted the fact that if my life is going shitty, my mom is wonderful, and if my life is going well, my mom is terrible. I haven't a clue why this is. She's basically the opposite of a good time friend. Jealousy? White knight syndrome? Both?

I'm patiently awaiting her latest guilt-trip email.

[statlerwaldorf]

My mom is strange. I really think she is one of those people that just shouldn't have kids when you think of those childfree debates. She's not a bad person. She never wanted to be married or be a mother, but just went along with it because she felt like that was what she was supposed to do. I get along with her now, but she is usually pretty busy doing her own stuff. I've gotten over most of my issues with her as a mother especially after having DD. Taking care of children is hard and I don't know how anyone does it that doesn't want to have children. I'd probably check out too.

[MixedBerryJam]

My mom is strange. I really think she is one of those people that just shouldn't have kids when you think of those childfree debates. She's not a bad person. She never wanted to be married or be a mother, but just went along with it because she felt like that was what she was supposed to do. I get along with her now, but she is usually pretty busy doing her own stuff. I've gotten over most of my issues with her as a mother especially after having DD. Taking care of children is hard and I don't know how anyone does it that doesn't want to have children. I'd probably check out too.[/quote]

Oh, and this reminded me of one more irksome thing about my mother: She always told people she really only wanted two kids (I was number 4 [of 5]), totally unaware that that would hurt #3 and all subsequent offspring. I think she was looking for kudos for having "made the sacrifices."STFU, Mom.

[statlerwaldorf]

Jun 24, 2012 19:36:28 GMT -5 MixedBerryJam said:

My mom is strange. I really think she is one of those people that just shouldn't have kids when you think of those childfree debates. She's not a bad person. She never wanted to be married or be a mother, but just went along with it because she felt like that was what she was supposed to do. I get along with her now, but she is usually pretty busy doing her own stuff. I've gotten over most of my issues with her as a mother especially after having DD. Taking care of children is hard and I don't know how anyone does it that doesn't want to have children. I'd probably check out too.

Oh, and this reminded me of one more irksome thing about my mother: She always told people she really only wanted two kids (I was number 4 [of 5]), totally unaware that that would hurt #3 and all subsequent offspring. I think she was looking for kudos for having "made the sacrifices."STFU, Mom. [/quote]

She never told me that until last year. It was kind of an ah-ha moment for me and a lot of her faults made sense. I don't think I could process that without feeling unloved or something as a child. I had a lot of issues with that back then and she never even expressly said it.

I have an aunt who says that about #4 that was unplanned. She likes to play the martyr card with everything. That would drive me nuts. I can't stand people like that.

[partiallysunny]

Good job fuss! I'm so proud.

She's a nice woman, but she is in a codependant relationship with a drug addict.

I loved her and looked up to her as a child. Now I find her sad and I realize she was actually a really selfish mother. Things I blamed on my father weren't really his fault. I never had a conversation with her (or my father) until I was 18. Now she is a martyr who likes to bitch but refuses to do anything to better her situation.

We barely talk. She calls about once every three months or so and it's just to see her grandson.

[kellbell191]

Good job! I'm in the same boat as Mags, my Mom passed away when I was 22 but she was pretty damn awesome while she was here.

[margarita]

Good for you, Fuss. Well done.

[Muddled]

That's a big step, Fuss.

My mom is nice. We didn't get along at all growing up, but now it's all good.

As long as we only spend 3-4 days together at a time.

[starrieskies]

My mom and I clash but for the most part we get along. She's getting on my last nerve lately, but usually she's at least tolerable. She does like to play the martyr card ALOT, and I don't deal with that very well. It annoys the shit out of me, but there's not a whole lot I can do about it, so I usually try to brush it off.

[wrathofkuus]

My mom is totally insane. It was problematic and kinda rough growing up, but as an adult, I find her to be delightfully quirky and eccentric.

[exploding people]

This thread is making me feel like my awesome mom is a unicorn.

As an adult, I'm starting to realize I'ma lot like her. So that must mean I am also awesome.

[malibu]

My mom is awesome. Wouldn't trade her for the world.

[macmars45]

My mom is awesome! I hope when I'm a mom I can be half as great as she is at the mom gig.

I'm the 5th daughter (no bio sons, just SILs).
Apparently I almost killed us both in the whole birth process. My grandma decided I needed to know that as a 12 year old. I'm pretty sure my mom was okay with me never knowing.

[CrazyLucky]

Jun 24, 2012 19:36:28 GMT -5 MixedBerryJam said:

My mom is strange. I really think she is one of those people that just shouldn't have kids when you think of those childfree debates. She's not a bad person. She never wanted to be married or be a mother, but just went along with it because she felt like that was what she was supposed to do. I get along with her now, but she is usually pretty busy doing her own stuff. I've gotten over most of my issues with her as a mother especially after having DD. Taking care of children is hard and I don't know how anyone does it that doesn't want to have children. I'd probably check out too.

We are long lost sisters! My mom is always making everything about her, and one-upping everything. If DS had colic for 3 months, my brother had it for six, and in those days the men didn't help out. My favorite is when she asks about DS, lets me say one sentence, then goes on for ten minutes about her ridiculously fat and spoiled cat! And I am the third child of a woman who "only wanted 2." I know how you feel!

Oh, and this reminded me of one more irksome thing about my mother: She always told people she really only wanted two kids (I was number 4 [of 5]), totally unaware that that would hurt #3 and all subsequent offspring. I think she was looking for kudos for having "made the sacrifices."STFU, Mom. [/quote]

[maucat]

Good for you fuss!!

My mom is pretty awesome, but since menopause is easier to anger and will snap at my father over the most inconsequential things. Lucky she just likes to go into very detailed descriptions of restaurant menus and dishes ordered with me.