Post by coribelle26 on Oct 30, 2013 11:01:08 GMT -5
As the only person in his extended family to go to college, my former golden-child husband heard that message plenty when he was growing up. I consider my job to be taking him down a few pegs and reminding him that he has to work hard.
I have told him that regarding one particular subject. Not as in "generally the smartest man I know". But he can read a book on how to build a motorcycle, start buying parts on e-bay and by spring be riding down the road. I don't know anyone else that can do that, so I have told him how impressed I am with that aspect of him. Would I ever tell him he is the smartest man I know while he sits on the couch fighting with his new iphone? Hell no!
I tell him specifically what I admire. He can take shit apart, figure how it works and improve it or put it back together without ever having done it before. He has this jeep that he loves. Before the jeep he never did car maintenance. He's replaces and upgraded things since then. No one has touched the jeep except him. He's pricing new brakes today to replace them. Its mind boggling to me.
If I said "you're the smahtest evahh!!!!" He would give me a funny look.
I say this all the time. Usually when he's been acting up.
He's very smart. Is he the smartest guy I know? No. And if I told him so, he'd know I was lying and would rattle off a list of our mutual friends with PhDs.
Well, my husband is smart. So there's that. (in grad school he taught math to undergrads for extra $ even though it wasn't his field. My husband is actually pretty close to @lauriegirl28's friend in his interests and degrees. MD PhD, neuroscience and neuropharmacology research, with a good grasp of international and political affairs.) I've told him many times that I married him in part because he's brilliant. He knows I find smart sexy. Helping my college boyfriend with the engineering calculus class I'd passed out of and he couldn't pass after two tries was an "I can't marry or have kids with this guy" moment for me so he knows I mean it.
I married DH for his brains, work ethic and kindness. He married me for my looks (which aren't that great, so the joke's on him). Our kid is pretty cute so he got his part of the bargain. Now she had better be brilliant ;-)
Post by pantsparty on Oct 30, 2013 11:27:54 GMT -5
Okay, I was thinking about this more, and H MIGHT be the smartest man I know. But I seriously want to gag thinking about telling him, "You're the smartest man I know!!!!" Laaaaaaaame.
Have I mentioned what a supportive and emotionally in-tune wife I am?
Post by noodleskooze on Oct 30, 2013 11:31:19 GMT -5
Am I a bad wife?
I'm pretty sure my H isn't as smart as I am, and I don't mean that to be rude. He has tons of amazing qualities, and he's smart in some sense, but not the academic sense, really.
Post by MixedBerryJam on Oct 30, 2013 11:33:43 GMT -5
DDH was the smartest man I've ever met. I'm trying to recall if I ever told him that. I doubt it. But he was always my go-to resource for anything science, math or bible.
I'm pretty sure my H isn't as smart as I am, and I don't mean that to be rude. He has tons of amazing qualities, and he's smart in some sense, but not the academic sense, really.
Is it bad to think that about my own husband?
Is it bad to think that you are smarter than him? Is this 1950? Hell no. I think we've moved past the middle ages when women were considered intellectually fragile since no one let them learn anything.
No way. My DH is very, very bright, but I'm an academic so I'm surrounded by smart people. I know tons of people smarter than both of us put together. However, I have no desire whatsoever to be married to any of them. Some of the brightest ones are kind of odd, really...