Haunted by the Newtown massacre, police officer faces firing

[stephm0188]

New York (CNN) -- A Newtown, Connecticut, police officer haunted by the horrific images of the mass shooting at an elementary school there said Monday that he could lose his job after being diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder.

Thomas Bean, one of the first officers to respond to the December 14 shooting that left 26 dead, including 20 children, told CNN that he has contemplated suicide, continues to have flashbacks, and is left crying some nights by memories of the bloodshed.

"Nothing could prepare you for that," Bean, a 12-year veteran, told CNN's Susan Candiotti. "The worst possible scenes you could think of ... Because all there was, was horror."

Bean was diagnosed with PTSD and has not been able to return to work. Six months after the mass shooting, the officer -- who responded to the tragedy on his day off -- was placed on long-term disability, according to Bean and his union.

"That day killed me inside," he said.

Training the brain to stress less

A letter from the police department, obtained by CNN, confirmed that he was "permanently disabled" but said he could be fired because Newtown could only afford to pay two years of long-term disability. He has a dozen years left on the job before being able to retire.

The union that represents Newton police officers may file a lawsuit.

"The men and women of the Newtown Police Department who did respond that day did their job," said Scott Ruszczyk, the union president. "They lived up to their end of their contract. It's now time for the town to live up to their end."

5 things to know about PTSD

Joe Aresimowicz, the House majority leader in the state General Assembly, said Connecticut covers mental health care only if the diagnosis is accompanied by physical injuries for long-term disability claims.

"We don't just cover mental injuries," he said. "The last thing you want is a first responder getting ready to enter a situation and have them think, 'I wonder what long-term harm this will do me?'"

In an e-mail, Newtown Police Chief Michael Kehoe declined to discuss the matter. Local officials did not return calls or e-mails seeking comment.

Bean told CNN that he broke down in tears after Sandy Hook Elementary School was cleared. He drank and smoked excessively. He even contemplated cutting himself with a razor. "I didn't want to kill myself but I wanted to feel something," he said. "Had no feeling, no sensation, no nothing."

Adam Lanza, 20, shot and killed 20 young children and six teachers in the school before taking his own life -- a massacre that prompted a national debate over tougher gun laws.

Bean said he knew he was in "deep, deep trouble" after entering a store one day.

"I looked at everyone in that store like they was going to kill me," he said. "I could not get out of that store fast enough. I looked around, and there was a crowd of people, and all I saw were flashbacks -- (the) firehouse with the families or what I saw that day."

Officer Bean, 38, who's married with two children, remains in therapy said he is grateful for support from one group in particular called Save a Warrior. Bean urges others suffering from PTSD to seek help.

"The Save A Warrior program that I went through is free," he said. "We even had some law enforcement from LAPD and NYPD go through the program."

Other Newtown police officers were diagnosed with PSTD, but Bean was the only one unable to return to work, union officials said.

"If I had my arm chopped off, they'd would say, 'Oh yeah, he's hurt.' But instead they're like, 'We can sweep (this) under the rug and not necessarily have to pay because ... it's not physically seen.' That's the problem with PTSD ... people don't see it," said Bean, his voice trailing off.

www.cnn.com/2013/11/11/us/connecticut-newtown-officer-ptsd/index.html?hpt=hp_c2

[ttt]

I'm genuinely surprised that *any* of the officers from that day were able to return to work. Cops see a lot of horrific things in their careers, but something like that goes beyond your run of the mill murder scene.

[mominatrix]

stories like this are EXACTLY why I hate hate hate the false dichotomy between "mental injuries" and "physical injuries"

...if he's disabled, he's disabled. Full stop.

[iammalcolmx]

This was mentioned here the day of the tragedy. You can't look at a bunch of babies killed in a mass shooting and be normal. He needs a ton of therapy, medication, and full retirement.

[stephm0188]

It seems like a cruel twist of fate that one mentally ill person's fucked up actions are ruining the lives of the first responders sent in to deal with his mess, and we still can't recognize a need for better mental healthcare.

[KateAggie]

Joe Aresimowicz, the House majority leader in the state General Assembly, said Connecticut covers mental health care only if the diagnosis is accompanied by physical injuries for long-term disability claims.

"We don't just cover mental injuries," he said. "The last thing you want is a first responder getting ready to enter a situation and have them think, 'I wonder what long-term harm this will do me?'"

I can barely breathe this is making me so angry. I'd much rather have police responding knowing that their long term harm, whether physical or mental, will be cared for without loss of job. Like they're not already worried about loss of life? Yet mental harm might make them "less" likely to respond appropriately. Fuck you, Joe Aresimowicz. Fuck you, and your skewed logic and complete lack of understanding for the realness of PTSD.

[emilyj]

Newtown can only afford to pay 2 years disability?

I call serious bullshit on that.

[Deleted]

Nov 11, 2013 23:01:24 GMT -5 ttt said:

I'm genuinely surprised that *any* of the officers from that day were able to return to work. Cops see a lot of horrific things in their careers, but something like that goes beyond your run of the mill murder scene.

I have trouble reading articles about that day. I am 100% positive that If I was THERE that day, I would never, ever recover, even with the best mental health services available.

ALL of these officers should be able to be on permanent disability. 

How are war veterans treated WRT PTSD? I know in Canada, you can get temporary disability, but I'm not sure how long you could apply for it. it has always bothered me how we prioritize/recognize physical ailments more than mental ones.

[ttt]

Nov 12, 2013 1:21:08 GMT -5 emilyj said:

Newtown can only afford to pay 2 years disability?

I call serious bullshit on that.

Didn't they raze the entire school and then build an identical new one on the same site? I mean, I don't blame them at all for doing that, but I find it very hard to believe they can't pay these benefits. That is not a poor town. 

[penguingrrl]

How depressing. I can't imagine anyone who was there that day being able to return to work after that. He should be granted full retirement benefits and able to take time to heal.

[emilyj]

Nov 12, 2013 8:54:42 GMT -5 ttt said:

Nov 12, 2013 1:21:08 GMT -5 emilyj said:

Newtown can only afford to pay 2 years disability?

I call serious bullshit on that.

Didn't they raze the entire school and then build an identical new one on the same site? I mean, I don't blame them at all for doing that, but I find it very hard to believe they can't pay these benefits. That is not a poor town. 

They are currently razing, and the new building is expected for 2016.  The town accepted $50 million of state money for that project. (http://www.nytimes.com/2013/10/26/nyregion/almost-a-year-after-massacre-newtown-begins-razing-sandy-hook.html?_r=0)

But you are right - this is an affluent town, in an affluent part of the country.  I refuse to believe they can't pay the benefits.  It's just so shitty. 

[MrsAxilla]

Nov 12, 2013 8:54:42 GMT -5 ttt said:

Nov 12, 2013 1:21:08 GMT -5 emilyj said:

Newtown can only afford to pay 2 years disability?

I call serious bullshit on that.

Didn't they raze the entire school and then build an identical new one on the same site? I mean, I don't blame them at all for doing that, but I find it very hard to believe they can't pay these benefits. That is not a poor town. 

They just tore down the school in the last few weeks.  I haven't heard what the plan for rebuilding is.

this story makes so much more sense than the shitty reporting I heard on CNN last night.  They said he was going to be fired because he was permanently disabled, with no mention of the benefit disparity between physical and mental disabilities.  I didn't understand why it was a story, since by definition "permanently disabled" means you can't work at all, so of course his employment would be over.  CNN truly sucks.

[pugz]

military veterans can be 100% service connected (military disability) for PTSD or other mental illnesses they developed during their years of service.

[jillboston]

Hmm. Maybe the NRA could raise a few bucks for this guy. Seeing as how he is literally a "good guy with a gun" and all.

[downtoearth]

Terrible - he should have benefits extended for awhile!

Do you think that the City has to follow that policy, but that they are actually prepared to settle the case? I would think that the lawyers for the City would be thinking this way b/c the policy is there for other instances, but that they are hoping they can settle for a large sum this one-time?

[5dollarshake]

Nov 12, 2013 11:02:31 GMT -5 emilyj said:

But you are right - this is an affluent town, in an affluent part of the country.  I refuse to believe they can't pay the benefits.  It's just so shitty. 

This is true, but I'm not surprised that Newtown says they can only pay for 2 years.  This is a town that has trouble passing the budget every year because there is a very loud contingent that is set on having no tax increase ever.  So many taxpayers in Newtown would be in an uproar if the officer was given more than the two years of disability.  It's ridiculous.

I wonder though, what happened to all of the money that was donated?  Why can't some of it go to the first responders?  I know some was given to the families who suffered a loss, but there's still a lot of money unaccounted for it seems.  The town keeps waiting for grant money from the state to do things like security upgrades in the other schools and rebuilding Sandy Hook.  That donated money should be used for some of these things, and definitely to support the first responders.

[Michelle]

Nov 12, 2013 11:09:25 GMT -5 pugz said:

military veterans can be 100% service connected (military disability) for PTSD or other mental illnesses they developed during their years of service.

CAN be is the key phrase. My dad saw some fucked up shit in Iraq and came back messed up in the head AND needed 2 total knee replacements but was not granted 100 percent disability.

My buddy is one of the guys after whom the movie Blackhawk Down was made. He still has PTSD from that incident and it was 20 yrs ago. He does not have 100 percent disability pay and he is a freakin legendary Army Ranger National Hero.

I can see why Newtown cannot afford to pay this guy 100 percent disability for life. That is a lot of years, and there were lots of people in the same situation So that could tuen into a huge debt that drives up taxes and drives out property owners.

However partial disability for a long time is reasonable, imo. He can get a job that does not trigger his PTSD and his disability pay should supplement the lost wages between what he makes in his new job and what he made in his old job, with hopefully his income getting up and past what it was at some point.

[laurenpetro]

Nov 13, 2013 10:04:41 GMT -5 @mx said:

What did happen to all of that money that people donated? I can't think of a more worthy use for it than helping first responders recover.

i know they built a bunch of (really, really nice) playgrounds around the country.  i can't see all that money being used on those playgrounds, though.