You get two boxers and don't do a great job training them so that when anyone knocks or rings the bell they lose. Their. Shit. Um, I'm guessing something like that would work like magic.
Shut the door. Youngs or olds. I have one doormat and they met it before knocking. They won't find another inside, willing to listen to their blabbing.
apalettepassion.wordpress.com/ WHO IS BONQUIQUI!?!?!?!??!
"I was thinking about getting off on demand, but it sounds like I should be glad that I didn't"
Post by cuddlyevil on Nov 19, 2013 21:02:23 GMT -5
I listen for the neighbors shouting "Oh mercy, not them again! They're out today!" two streets over. Then I hope it's the elder who doesn't trim his nose hair.
Post by coribelle26 on Nov 19, 2013 21:23:34 GMT -5
My dad has found great success with enthusiastically offering to teach them about his religion. He pulls out textbooks and rosaries (we're Catholic, so basically Satanists in the eyes of doorbell-ringing faiths).
ETA: Just to be clear, I mean great success in getting them to run away as fast as their sensible slacks will carry them, not great success in sparking stimulating interfaith dialogue.
1. Two Elders from the Church of Jesus Christ knocked on my door and asked if I wanted to learn about Jesus and if I wanted to get baptized. I politely said that I'm a Hindu. They responded that I wouldn't be close to God if I didn't get baptized. After a lot of polite back and forth, they prayed for my soul and left. LOL. How do I handle this kind of situation next time without wasting 45 minutes?
2. Anyone from ML in the Seattle area? Would like to get to know you better.
You could invite them in to tell you all about Jesus, over a nice bottle of vodka and some weed.
Post by DotAndBuzz on Nov 19, 2013 21:37:45 GMT -5
I just tell them I'm comfortable with where I am in regards to my religion and spirituality, and thank you anyways. If they offer the book, I just say no thanks with a smile as I close the door.
I like my dad's take on it - he always says to their offer to help with his faith/whatever, "oh, I'm sorry, I'm way beyond help at this point." That usually gets an awkward laugh/smile from them as he closes the door. Sometimes he sends them down the street to my bff parents' house, where her dad is now a complete tye-dye loving, pot smoking hippie (I call him that with love, as does my bff) who loves nothing more than talking about philosophy/religion and other worlds to anyone who will listen. i'm sure that is an, um, enlightening conversation.
Generally I don't open the door. If I'm dumb and somehow the door gets open I tell them no and to not ever come back. I once got a bit snippy with some Jehovah's Witnesses when two sets of them came to my door on the same day just an hour or so apart.
1. Two Elders from the Church of Jesus Christ knocked on my door and asked if I wanted to learn about Jesus and if I wanted to get baptized. I politely said that I'm a Hindu. They responded that I wouldn't be close to God if I didn't get baptized. After a lot of polite back and forth, they prayed for my soul and left. LOL. How do I handle this kind of situation next time without wasting 45 minutes?
1. There are several ways to get them to leave you alone. I've used some of these methods.
A. I start speaking in Spanish. Are you bilingual? That one usually works. B. I tell them about being Catholic (in your case Hindu) and explain how MY religion is the one that will really get them into heaven (or whatever after life Hindus believe in if there is one, please excuse my ignorance, I know nothing about the Hindu religion) - reverse psychology! C. I tell my husband to answer the door. Sometimes he goes to the door shirtless, and he'll stick his finger in his belly button and ask them the most random questions ever: Have you seen my fish? How many days until last week? Can you call my mom?
Seriously, when people come preaching to our doorstep it's like fucking Christmas!
2. I live approximately 2,353 miles from Seattle. Bummer.
1. There are several ways to get them to leave you alone. I've used some of these methods.
A. I start speaking in Spanish. Are you bilingual? That one usually works. B. I tell them about being Catholic (in your case Hindu) and explain how MY religion is the one that will really get them into heaven (or whatever after life Hindus believe in if there is one, please excuse my ignorance, I know nothing about the Hindu religion) - reverse psychology! C. I tell my husband to answer the door. Sometimes he goes to the door shirtless, and he'll stick his finger in his belly button and ask them the most random questions ever: Have you seen my fish? How many days until last week? Can you call my mom?
Seriously, when people come preaching to our doorstep it's like fucking Christmas!
2. I live approximately 2,353 miles from Seattle. Bummer.
/dead
Yeah, for an old guy he can be pretty funny sometimes.
Post by CheshireGrin on Nov 19, 2013 22:17:41 GMT -5
I have yet to experience the Mormons firsthand, but with Jehovah's Witnesses, all I have to say is "I'm Jewish," and they decide I'm beyond help and go away.
I like the idea of just speaking Tamil to them. They can't preach at you if you don't speak English, right?
We have a neighbor a block or so down from us and he'll call DH and warn him that the "Bible Thumpers" are in full force in the neighborhood.
Right after we met, someone came knocking on the door and we were talking in the kitchen and he says, "Oh. Be right back!" He ran into a spare room and came out wearing flippers on his feet and when I came back I asked him what *that* was all about and he told me.
I have yet to experience the Mormons firsthand, but with Jehovah's Witnesses, all I have to say is "I'm Jewish," and they decide I'm beyond help and go away.
I like the idea of just speaking Tamil to them. They can't preach at you if you don't speak English, right?
I have yet to experience the Mormons firsthand, but with Jehovah's Witnesses, all I have to say is "I'm Jewish," and they decide I'm beyond help and go away.
I like the idea of just speaking Tamil to them. They can't preach at you if you don't speak English, right?
They do the same thing to Catholics.
lol
My charitable view of this phenomenon is that their goal is not really to interfere with anyone else's faith, but to reach out to people who may not have thought about it yet. But if you already have your own beliefs, they're not really trying to change you. An acquaintance who was a Jehovah's Witness explained it to me like that once.
I've had the conversation before. "I believe in God and am happy in my beliefs." I've talked with them briefly but not gotten into dogma. I figure they'll convert me after I'm dead and buried but never before that.
I'm north end. But I have no life outside of kids,school,pta,scouts...
My front door has frosted glass on it, but you can still see in when you come up close to it. I've walked up to it, looked out at them, and walked away. Didn't open it. Didn't even turn down my tv. This happened last week.
Best bet is just to not open the door or to tell them clearly not to come back.
A roommate and I moved into an apartment and a pair of missionaries started coming by a couple of times a week. We knew who they were and just ignored them thinking they'd eventually give up. After two weeks they sent their mission leader, or bishop, I'm not sure. I just know they basically went back and asked their boss to come visit since we wouldn't answer the door.
1. Two Elders from the Church of Jesus Christ knocked on my door and asked if I wanted to learn about Jesus and if I wanted to get baptized. I politely said that I'm a Hindu. They responded that I wouldn't be close to God if I didn't get baptized. After a lot of polite back and forth, they prayed for my soul and left. LOL. How do I handle this kind of situation next time without wasting 45 minutes?
2. Anyone from ML in the Seattle area? Would like to get to know you better.
I'm in Seattle! But I don't know if you'd like to get to know me better, because I would probably have shut the door in their faces after two minutes.
Post by amberlyrose on Nov 19, 2013 23:29:47 GMT -5
My brother once used a laser sight on his paintball gun and aimed it at them from a side window. They ran pretty quickly.
Once my dad pulled out his King James Bible and a beer and sat on our porch for a good two hours telling them how wrong they were. I had to keep fetching cold beer for him. Parenting win right there