DYING - update to DS's yellow/green behavior system

[vanillacourage]

I knew I liked his teacher before but OMG the woman is a saint. 

OP here - summary: DS1 is in K, has a color-coded behavior system, I pinged his teacher because he's never once been on the "best" color and was starting to get discouraged.  My email to her was just "hey, he's bummed about it, are there specific areas he can work on?"

Here is her reply.  DH and I laughed until we literally cried.  Keep in mind when reading that his class has 26 freaking kids in it.

Hi Vanilla,

Here are a few examples of situations that have happened today. While we were on the carpet this morning I had to remind him to sit on his bottom four times in about 30 minutes. The children are reminded to sit on their bottoms when they come to the carpet and reminded that this is important so the other children behind them can see. It is not unusual to have to remind (DS) several times to sit on his bottom, When I first read your email I glanced over to see what he was doing and he was lying on his table with his torso across his neighbor's desk all the while talking to the person across the table. When he saw me looking at him he said "why do you always look at me", he said that a few weeks ago in a similar situation!

After lunch while waiting his turn for the bathroom he was sitting in line in the hall like he should have been doing and he unpacked his lunch box, took out the ice pak and transformed it into a laptop and proceeded to type away. No doubt sending you all a message that his teacher needn't be such a hawkeye. Earlier in the week when we were again in line for the restroom he began hopping like a frog and saying ribit, ribit. So lines seem to be challenge.

The most recent redirection I gave him was during our quiet time. There are seven people at his table and we only rest for about five minutes between recess and specials. Of the seven, four had their heads down and were not talking. The other three did not have their heads down and were talking and (DS) was again lying across the table like earlier in the day. I asked him to look at the people at his table and tell me what the four with their heads down had in common and what the three with their heads up and talking had in common. He of course knew exactly what I was talking about, the four were on green and the three on yellow. These are pretty typical behaviors that are keeping him from getting on green.

I have explained to the kids that in order to be on green you have to be able to get through the day without any reminders from the adults on how to behave. Some children achieve this early on and others take longer to understand the expectations and be able to carry them out. I think with (DS) it is natural to expect him to be able to do this because his intellectual abilities exceed what we would expect of a child his age but his behaviors are very much what we expect of a child his age. So there is a discrepancy between intellect and behavior. Keep in mind he is a young kindergartener, many of his peers are already six and some a full year older than he is. Please do not let any of this be a stresser. I would recommend not talking about it unless he brings it up. Kindergarten is about learning what school is all about and he is doing that. I am happy to talk more but unfortunately today I am heading out of town right after school. I can meet with you on Monday after school if that works for you. Again, please don't let this be a source of stress for the family. (DS) is doing great, learning lots and most importantly it seems like he is having fun at school.

Signed,
Teacher

My email back to her -

Hi Teacher,

I hope it's ok if I admit that your email totally made my husband and I laugh until we cried. "Why are you looking at me" is where we lost it and "ribbit ribbit" is when the tears started. If (DS) is only 1/26th of your day then I'm all the more amazed at your ability to keep your cool.

Thank you for the tips. We are ok with (DS) being on yellow - I think you said at the beginning that yellow meant they were ready to learn but needed some help to stay focused, and that's all I expect of a 5 year old. When he gets a little bummed about not getting on green we tell him that every day is a chance to try again.

On the bright side, he is learning so much every day and we appreciate all that you (and the "specials" teachers) are doing for him.

Thanks,
Vanilla

[halfpint]

I loved this - "No doubt sending you all a message that his teacher needn't be such a hawkeye". She sounds great.

[toesie]

That's awesome! Goodness, I'm dying laughing here.

[Deleted]

I can't stop laughing! This is amazing and I hope you print off copies for later laughs.

[imojoebunny]

That is funny. I like your teacher.

[carolinagirl831]

ha! funny update. Good to know his behaviors are typical and not truly acting out. Thats tough though! It's hard for Kinders to behave that way all day long!

[carolinagirl831]

ha! funny update. Good to know his behaviors are typical and not truly acting out. Thats tough though! It's hard for Kinders to behave that way all day long!

[pamela]

That sounds just about right for an above-average intellect kid. :-) And look on the bright side, the teacher has high standards for green, not "everyone wins a green trophy!" system.

[justjen]

haha. Awesome.

[takeonyou]

She rocks!

[egishere]

He sounds like a character! lol And yes being a Kindy teacher is my worst nightmare!

[vanillacourage]

Dec 9, 2013 13:04:15 GMT -5 pennypenny said:

That is funny. Good to know that the teacher thinks they are age appropriate behaviors. Is there a lot of redshirting in your area?

Not that I was aware of, but while I knew he would be young-ish for the grade since his birthday is in early June (cut-off is August 1st) I didn't realize that there were kids a full year older than him in the same class.  Poor kid is also pretty small for his age (just hit 36 lbs at 5.5y) so I'm glad he has a good sense of humor working in his favor. 

[arch01]

That's awesome.

That teacher is awesome, too. She seems to deal quite well with all of this!!

[Deleted]

Aww I want to teach kindergarten for a day. She seems great.

[readyin07]

Uh yeah she sounds awesome. Maybe Invite her out for a drink lol. Just curious, what is the reward system for green? I know in my area a few schools have that system and green woukd probably describe your DS (few minor redirections needed for non disruptive behavior, follows redirection immediately) . It comes with its own rewards and blue is the "heavenly behavior" which is for the kids who need absolutely no redirection and comes with other benefits.

I am not one who thinks "green for everyone" but it can be frustrating to never get rewards for prety darn good behavior. personally I am cool with my kid being middle ground. I was always a blue kid and sometimes I thiink what your teacher said is spot on, having fun in school and learning well is what is important.

[anelms]

That's awesome. She sounds like such a great teacher. I can't imagine 26 kindergartners.

[vanillacourage]

Dec 9, 2013 13:42:52 GMT -5 readyin07 said:

Uh yeah she sounds awesome. Maybe Invite her out for a drink lol. Just curious, what is the reward system for green?

Each kid has a clothespin that moves up and down an all-class chart depending on what color they're on, so there's a little bit of peer pressure.  When they have free-play, kids on green also get first crack at some of the better toys/activities in the class (which also happen to be the ones that are the most expensive, like the class iPad, so I have no problem with these being reserved for kids who are better-behaved).

[jloww]

That's hilarious!

I was surprised to see the negative responses to the color code system in your OP.  DS has the exact same system in his preschool class and his teacher said it's his greatest motivator.  He has really thrived with it.  He is also on the young side (birthday is 12 days before he cut off), so we've had the same issues with him being behaviorally behind those a year older than him.

DS gets a prize from the treasure chest on Thursdays if he lands in the top color all 4 days.  I think I like your son's teacher's reward better.

[salliekate]

This is amazing! I hope every day that my kids get a great teacher like that.

[stealthmom]

You're very lucky to get such good feedback.  I like my son's teacher and know she's very good, but it's hard to get any sort of narrative out of her.

That's a riot.

[dbsk8dance]

This is amazing. I feel like this could be me in 1 year.

[Deleted]

I wish that elementary school teachers could write blogs!

[redheadk]

That is awesome! She sounds amazing.

I have to agree with her with the "the behaviors are normal and it's fine, even if he's not perfect" line of thinking. Nothing to stress over

[megs193]

I am amazed that any 5 year old can get a "green". I'm not sure I could get a green most days.

[Willis Jackson]

My favorite part is, "Why do you always look at me?"

[lindyanne]

That's hilarious. And I think my kid is going to be your kid if we send him to kindergarten next year. I registered him for preschool next year and his teacher was surprised to see me there and said he's absolutely ready. He has a July birthday so he will be 5 for the entire year. And I can totally see him doing everything the teacher was talking about.

[eddy]

Oh man if a kid had to make it a whole day without correction Jack would NEVER be on green.

I wonder how many kids actually get to be on green? Do you know?

I have a squirrely little boy so I have no idea if the majority of kids can make it through a day without reminders. He sounds like your little guy.

[vanillacourage]

Dec 10, 2013 9:27:03 GMT -5 eddy said:

I wonder how many kids actually get to be on green? Do you know?

About half the class, it seems.  Although now that I know that there are kids a full year older than him in there, I'm not as impressed. 

There are two other colors below yellow, but it seems they're reserved for when a kid is having a bad day, and they're back on yellow when they come in the next morning.

[eddy]

Dec 10, 2013 9:57:57 GMT -5 vanillacourage said:

Dec 10, 2013 9:27:03 GMT -5 eddy said:

I wonder how many kids actually get to be on green? Do you know?

About half the class, it seems.  Although now that I know that there are kids a full year older than him in there, I'm not as impressed. 

There are two other colors below yellow, but it seems they're reserved for when a kid is having a bad day, and they're back on yellow when they come in the next morning.

Ahh so yellow is essentially doing pretty good. That makes sense. I thought it was just three and I was like "Damn it is tough in that class lol."

[vanillacourage]

Dec 10, 2013 10:00:43 GMT -5 eddy said:

Dec 10, 2013 9:57:57 GMT -5 vanillacourage said:

About half the class, it seems.  Although now that I know that there are kids a full year older than him in there, I'm not as impressed. 

There are two other colors below yellow, but it seems they're reserved for when a kid is having a bad day, and they're back on yellow when they come in the next morning.

Ahh so yellow is essentially doing pretty good. That makes sense. I thought it was just three and I was like "Damn it is tough in that class lol."

Yeah.  Slackers need not apply!

There is red, which is a kiddo having a bad day, and then purple, which requires a note be sent home & signed.  DUN DUN DUN