Neighbor Dilemma

[kaylie]

So on one side of the house we have the nicest neighbors ever. Older couple of original owners who are friendly and keep their dog quiet.

On the other side we have youngish parents with three children. We don't really mind the yelling and screaming, but there are a few issues that have come up:

They had a party a few weeks back. The two little boys play baseball and constantly hit balls over our fence that I throw back. This time, they hit a bunch of them and apparently started coming over by themselves to get them back. This wouldn't be a huge issue, but the oldest one is only 4 or 5. I was coming back from a lunch and as I turned into my drive way they shot out from around the corner and (not exaggerating) I almost hit them with my car. The balls in the yard are only slightly annoying because they land close to my veggie garden but at that point I went over to talk to the mom because kids that young alone in my yard scares me. Oh, and I almost killed them so that was scarier. I told her it was fine if she wanted to send her husband or an older kid, but I wasn't okay with the younger ones being in by themselves. She apologized and it was fine.

Last night they had another party and set off a bunch of firecrackers. More than seven of which landed in my yard and were littered all over the place, including my garden. I'm really pissed that smoking firecrackers that were likely giving off some sort of toxin were all over my vegetables. WTF, who does that?

So far, all I've done is collect all of the balls and firecracker debris and throw it back on their side of the fence. I don't chat with them regularly, but should I say something? Am I over reacting? I don't want to be the annoying bitch neighbor, but at the same time I don't want shit in my yard anymore.

ETA: The type of firecrackers they're using are illegal in the state because they go airborne.

[IIOY]

Is this the first time they've used firecrackers? If so, I might let it go this time, particularly if you generally have good relations with them. A second incident would warrant a conversation about safety and liability issues, litter in your yard, etc..

A child in potential danger is ALWAYS a reason for a conversation.

[kaylie]

We don't really have any relations with them and by the time we have kids, theirs will be too old to play with ours so I'm not too worried about that. I'm hoping that throwing the garbage back over is enough to make them realize it wasn't cool. H wants to hang a sign over the fence that says "your side" but I thought that was a bit too aggressive.

It's just so absurd to me. We have tons of pine trees around here with needles littering the ground so the risk of fire is a concern. One landed really close to our house. On top of that, it's just rude! I mean, what if we just started throwing our trash over the fence?

[mollybrown]

I would have just called the police about the fireworks. I wouldn't bother talking to them about it, since I find it hard to believe they don't know they're illegal. I might be biased because I live in a state that has about a dozen wildfires going on. We also had a house that caught on fire in my neighborhood as a child because some idiot was setting of fireworks and one landed in the tree.

I'd talk to them again about keeping the kids off of your property. It's a huge liability for them to be at your house when you're not home. I'd also get a lock to make sure they stayed out. If you don't mind the balls in the yard, just let them know you will throw the balls back over when you get home.

[vanillahip]

Jun 30, 2012 13:15:20 GMT -5 mollybrown said:

I would have just called the police about the fireworks. I wouldn't bother talking to them about it, since I find it hard to believe they don't know they're illegal. I might be biased because I live in a state that has about a dozen wildfires going on.

Mmm, you are biased there. They're legal in this state.

I think you were right about the kid in your yard but otherwise I think you should chill a bit. Smoke from a firecracker is not going to make your tomatoes poisonous. The safety of the kids is one thing but having the most perfect yard where nothing out of your control ever ever happens is another- don't be "that neighbor"!

[kaylie]

There is absolutely no way that they don't know they're illegal. PA has really funny fireworks laws. Anything that goes airborne is illegal. That type of firecracker can be sold in PA, but only to someone with an out of state ID. It's funnier on the other side of the state where Ohio apparently has similar laws, so the Ohioans go to PA and the PA folks to go Ohio for their pyro purchases.

My husband says that if it happens again he'll go talk to them.

[slug*bug]

I always think that conversations that may have a negative tone are best had in person: writing an email (or hanging a sign over the fence...ugh) are a lot less likely to get you what you want.

It sounds like you have a decent relationship w/them.

If that's actually the case, I'd bake or buy a plate of cookies, gather up all of the balls that have fallen into your yard and head next door. I'd use the holiday as an excuse "I know we're all spending a lot of time outdoors with the holiday and all, and we all like fireworks, but there was a lot of debris in my garden..." etc. Ask nicely, but firmly, that they be more careful of the fence in the area near your yard/tomatoes. Thank them for being more careful, hand them the cookies and all of the balls from your yard and hope for the best.

I would absolutely not throw trash or debris from the fireworks back into their yard: if they really are jerky neighbors, that's not going to solve anything...it just makes you look childish.

[smucky]

Uggggh. I'd be piiiiiiiiiiissed. What if you had a dog/cat in your yard that their fireworks hit? Not okay, IMO. I'd go over there & have a chat about the fireworks, maybe frame it like you think they DON'T know they're illegal & you're helpfully informing them...
I'd also let them know that due to liability issues, your gate will now be locked & you'll toss the balls back when you have a chance. Then I'd take my sweet-ass time doing so, so that the kids would try harder not to let them go into your yard. But I can't stand screamy little kids & can be kind of a bitch when it comes to other people invading my turf, LOL.

[jena]

Fireworks are just a temporary issue, I'd be annoyed but probably wouldn't say anything (but would call the cops if it got excessive).

For the rest... Put a lock on the gate. Problem solved.

[housegeek]

I wouldn't say anything. It's a couple days a year, I get that it sucks, but if they are normally great neighbors...

[kaylie]

Thanks everyone. H said he didn't hear any tonight, so we'll probably just end up letting it go if it doesn't happen again. I'm definitely not one to suffer fools gladly, so I'll act on it if it happens again.