Not BFing #2?

[weardogbride]

Hi ladies, I post here and there on GBCN. I'm 20 weeks pregnant with DS2 and from the minute I found out i was pregnant, I've had anxiety about BFing again. I had a c/s with DS1 and am 99% sure I will with this one. I also had a terrible, miserable experience BFing.

DS1 had a bad latch and as a result my nips looked like raw hamburger for weeks. I couldn't wear shirts bc anything touching them hurt like hell. I had bouts of mastitis and cannot remember ever being so sick. I thought I was dying. The first month of BFing him was the most painful experience of my life. He got exclusively BM for the first 4 months and I continued to nurse or pump for 8 months until my milk dried up. I never produced much milk, so he nursed ALL.THE.TIME. it was truly exhausting and horrible.

So, I am pretty sure I do not even want to attempt it this time, for my sanity. I also have no idea how I would BF as much as I had to last time with a 3 year old running around. (I was never one of those moms who could throw the baby in a carrier and nurse hands free). My ass was planted on the couch using special pillows to help us.

I know how much pressure the hospital staff puts on you to nurse. How do I avoid this if I decide to go straight to formula? Should I talk to my doc before hand? Am I expected to bring bottles? I know I still have a ways to go, but its already stressing me out! I joke and say I have PTSD from BFing, but sometimes I think I really might!

[Deleted]

I EFF DS from day one (and plan on only FF this time too) and it was no big deal. He was jaundiced anyway so the nurses wanted him to have a bottle right away. I told them I was not nursing and it wasn't an issue. I assume your OB will ask you and have that info in your file? Also, have you husband field some of the questions or comments about it if they are difficult or badgering you. Good luck!

Also, you don't need to bring anything. The hospital will have ready to use formula right there (usually either enfamil or similac) and will even probably send you home with some.

[starlily]

I would tell your OB ahead of time and be sure to double check the hospital's policy regarding formula. Hospitals that hold a "baby friendly" designation will give formula only if medically necessary. They also will not send you home with any formula samples, even if your baby was receiving formula in the hospital.

Signed,
Had to stop at CVS for some Enfamil while bringing our preemie home

[weardogbride]

Ok it's good to know that they ask. The hospital I delivered DS1 at would not give formula and did not send home any samples. They had lactation consultants coming in constantly and i don't remember having an option! Maybe they did ask and I just forgot.

[starlily]

Jan 2, 2014 23:53:42 GMT -5 weardogbride said:

Ok it's good to know that they ask. The hospital I delivered DS1 at would not give formula and did not send home any samples. They had lactation consultants coming in constantly and i don't remember having an option! Maybe they did ask and I just forgot.

Mine was "baby friendly" & had a steady stream of LCs too, but they did ask me about bf'ing and other preferences when I first got up to L & D. They wrote it all down on a whiteboard in the room, so that as the shift changed the staff would be aware.

[sonrisa]

You should absolutely do what is best for you and let them know that up front. I'd go so far as to tell the nurses on each shift that you don't want to see the lactation consultant. They might be able to head them off at the pass.

On a personal note, I had a hard time BFing my first after a long, bad labor and c-section. Bad latch, musculoskeletal issues, low supply, lots of pain, lots of time pumping, lots of time with lactation consultants. This time I swore I would supplement if she needed more than I could do easily because I wasn't going through that again. I scheduled this c-section and asked them to place her skin to skin while they stitched me up (not nursing, just cuddling). We tried nursing when they wheeled me out of the OR into recovery. This one has a fantastic latch, my supply is good, no raw nipples, she nurses then sleeps really well. I'm not saying you should try this time. Just that if you do, you might have a different experience than last time.

[amaristella]

Jan 2, 2014 23:30:04 GMT -5 starlily said:

I would tell your OB ahead of time and be sure to double check the hospital's policy regarding formula. Hospitals that hold a "baby friendly" designation will give formula only if medically necessary. They also will not send you home with any formula samples, even if your baby was receiving formula in the hospital.

Signed,
Had to stop at CVS for some Enfamil while bringing our preemie home

This is good advice. You can look up online to see if your hospital has the baby friendly designation. It's done by the World Health Organization. Also, even if your hospital doesn't show up on the list it's possible they could be working on getting their designation which would mean that they are already putting those practices into effect. (Definitely ask!)

In my hospital the paper name tag on the bassinet thingy had two check boxes. One for breast and one for formula. I would hope that once a box is checked that they would simply follow what is written and not try to hassle a new mom over her decision. What a poor time to do such a thing!

[Velar Fricative]

If you decide to try BFing again, you may not have the same experience. Many mothers have different BFing experiences with each kid.

Having said that, it's understandable that you wouldn't want to potentially go through that already. If you EFF from Day 1, the hospital likely won't badger you. If they do, I agree with asking your husband or even any visitors you have to intervene if they seem to be ignoring your wishes. Good luck!

[Deleted]

Jan 2, 2014 23:30:04 GMT -5 starlily said:

I would tell your OB ahead of time and be sure to double check the hospital's policy regarding formula. Hospitals that hold a "baby friendly" designation will give formula only if medically necessary. They also will not send you home with any formula samples, even if your baby was receiving formula in the hospital.

Signed,
Had to stop at CVS for some Enfamil while bringing our preemie home

That "baby friendly" stuff makes me so annoyed I can't even see straight. Thank goodness only one hospital in the state (not the one I am delivering at) is designated that way.

[lafawnduh]

I'm in a similar boat with #2. I learned my lesson the first time around and will be FF this time. I think BF/FF is a question on the pre-registration form for the birthing center. I need to fill that out soon. I really don't anticipate any issues from the hospital staff, and it feels good to have this decision made going into it.

[starlily]

Jan 3, 2014 9:34:07 GMT -5 @mjmksb04 said:

Jan 2, 2014 23:30:04 GMT -5 starlily said:

I would tell your OB ahead of time and be sure to double check the hospital's policy regarding formula. Hospitals that hold a "baby friendly" designation will give formula only if medically necessary. They also will not send you home with any formula samples, even if your baby was receiving formula in the hospital.

Signed,
Had to stop at CVS for some Enfamil while bringing our preemie home

That "baby friendly" stuff makes me so annoyed I can't even see straight. Thank goodness only one hospital in the state (not the one I am delivering at) is designated that way.

Oh it makes me so mad too. Sorry my body couldn't produce any milk for 10 days and was so "unfriendly" to my baby. #eyeroll Gah!

[weardogbride]

Jan 3, 2014 9:34:07 GMT -5 @mjmksb04 said:

Jan 2, 2014 23:30:04 GMT -5 starlily said:

I would tell your OB ahead of time and be sure to double check the hospital's policy regarding formula. Hospitals that hold a "baby friendly" designation will give formula only if medically necessary. They also will not send you home with any formula samples, even if your baby was receiving formula in the hospital.

Signed,
Had to stop at CVS for some Enfamil while bringing our preemie home

That "baby friendly" stuff makes me so annoyed I can't even see straight. Thank goodness only one hospital in the state (not the one I am delivering at) is designated that way.

OMG, no joke. It's ridiculous to imply if you're not BFing, you are so unfriendly to your baby. Barf.

Thanks so much for all of the advice! I was really worried I was going to be pressured/judged and it was going to be tough. I don't remember filling out anything with DS1, but I prob did. I was so scared over delivery and excited, I could have signed who knows what! Lol.

[ilikedonuts]

I've never BF either kid.

DH was on high alert both times because he knew I would punch someone if they harassed me about it. With DD1, the nurse asked what my plan was when she was like 20 minutes old, I told them and no one blinked an eye. They went and got the formula. My OB already knew that I was going to FF. No LC stopped by.

With DD2, my main L&D nurse did the whole "ohhhhh you should try. you might love it." and I looked her right in the eye and said "no thank you." And that was that. No LC stopped by.

I was way more worried about it then I should have been.