Unstick me on travel options: a WWYD I feel very lame about

[y4m]

I have a work trip to CA the week after next.  I am currently scheduled to stay through Thursday, but work needs me until Friday morning, so I need to change the flight no matter what, and change fees are reimbursable.

My family lives about 2.5 hours from work.  I am debating whether to stay over the weekend and see my family (I can change to a slightly closer airport for my return, but it's still a PITA vs. just coming home).  I made the mistake of throwing out this option to my mom without fully thinking it through, and now I am feeling guilty about really wanting to just go home Friday instead.

Why I don't want to stay:
-I will miss my house and be exhausted socially after a week of work stuff
-Expense/hassle/logistics of getting myself from work to their house somehow
-There's a good chance that the week after this weekend will involve trips to both Paris and Mexico
-Nephew has other family in town, so I won't get to see him (which was kind of the point)
-I was just there for Christmas

Why I feel like I need to stay:
-Don't disappoint mom
-Just found out that dad has prostate cancer.  Seems like the prognosis after surgery is VERY good as it is very early, but still a scary moment for them

Would you see the family or come home?

This is super lame and I apologize.

[FishChicks]

Ugh, that's tough. Is your dad the type of person who would appreciate your presence, or is he someone that wants to be alone to process for a while? If your dad would prefer you to visit, then I would deal with the hassle of a weekend visit. A cancer diagnosis is scary, and support from family can be very meaningful.

[dexteroni]

Because of your dad, and because you already mentioned it to your mom, and I'm guessing she wants you to stay, I would stay. But it's ok to come home. Just tell her you have to go home because there's a chance you may have to leave for your next trip on Monday.

ETA: I'm glad your dad's cancer was caught early, and that his prognosis is very good. It's still scary for all involved though.

[phoeny]

I'd go.

[insominac]

How's your sister doing? Did they move? I was thinking about her a few days ago.

I think you should go home too. lol

[rubytue]

How often do you see your family? I'd probably go, but my folks are at the age and with the health issues that mean time is getting short. I totally get not wanting to, though. When I use to travel for work a lot, I had to fit in a trip to the ILs in between a bunch of other trips. Changing time zones 9 times in 6 weeks. I was so miserable to be around during that trip, everyone probably world have been happier if I stayed home.

[y4m]

I go often. I was there in October, November, and December. I probably average 8x a year.

[y4m]

They've known about the cancer since thanksgiving, but they didn't want to tell us until they knew if it had spread and what the prognosis was (no, and it's good). So they just told us now.

Sister is doing ok--they are in a rental while they rebuild the house.

[gt7301b]

I'd spend Friday evening with the family and head home on Saturday.

[krystee]

Can they come to you for one night so you could all hang out Friday night and have breakfast together the next day, and you could go home out of the same airport on Saturday afternoon?

[mbcdefg]

Can you meet them halfway for dinner?

If it was me, and if I had a good relationship with my family, I think I would just go see them.

[rubytue]

Jan 11, 2014 19:30:33 GMT -5 y4m said:

I go often. I was there in October, November, and December. I probably average 8x a year.

In that case, I would beg off this time. Tell them you'd rather plan a longer visit when you aren't too tired.

[dexteroni]

Jan 11, 2014 19:46:56 GMT -5 RockNVoll said:

Jan 11, 2014 19:30:33 GMT -5 y4m said:

I go often. I was there in October, November, and December. I probably average 8x a year.

In that case I think it's fine for you to just go home and tell them you'll see them again soon.

I agree.

[Balki.Bartokomous]

I think you're fine. If you want to compromise, I'd stay where you are, have them drive to you for Friday night dinner (lunch if they don't work - ?), and then fly out the next morning so you still have a day or so to recuperate.

[sproutmd]

I'd double check with your dad, but really, I wouldn't go. You visit quite often. Let them know if the next time you plan to visit. Don't be so hard on yourself.

[KaraOrNot]

I'd stay.

[ddi741]

I'd go see the family

[wise_rita]

I'd go visit.

Signed,
Projecting onto you because I didn't see my family once in 2013

[af1212]

I would go visit.

[orangeblossom]

I'd go, but I'm biased , as I rarely pass up an opportunity to miss seeing family.

[justjen]

I always vote family

[y4m]

I think you guys helped me find a third way. I can book my return Saturday afternoon out of the airport by work. Then take Friday afternoon through Saturday morning with the family, with a reasonable round trip rental car, and still be home all day Sunday. Thank you!

[Deleted]

Given the frequency that you go home and the upcoming international travel I would skip it. I am always exhausted after work trips and knowing that there are more trips coming up makes it even worse. I would want to be home as much as possible between trips.

[ESF]

Jan 12, 2014 10:00:58 GMT -5 y4m said:

I think you guys helped me find a third way. I can book my return Saturday afternoon out of the airport by work. Then take Friday afternoon through Saturday morning with the family, with a reasonable round trip rental car, and still be home all day Sunday. Thank you!

This solution sounds perfect. I'm sorry about your dad's diagnosis, but happy to hear the outlook sounds good.

[azurely]

Since you already mentioned it, I'd go see my family because I wouldn't want to let my mom down. Especially if my dad was just dx with cancer, even if it is a good prognosis.