online videos/classes?

[marie3246]

I don't know why, but I'm starting to regret/freak out that we haven't really taken any classes to prepare for birth. I feel so overwhelmed and after taking with H a bit I realize he knows nothing about birth other than a baby comes at the end of it and I am really doubting his ability to be a good supportive partner during birth (I realize this isn't fair). He was never on board to take classes since we went to one (4th trimester Happiest baby on the block) and it was pretty bad/boring and long and drawn out. The classes are also tough hours for his work schedule and cost a decent amount for what they offer. 

Anyone know of any good online classes/videos about strategies for childbirth/comfort measures or what to expect? I am also now considering hiring a doula mainly because I don't think H will be a good support  I don't think a doula would be a bad idea anyways, but they are expensive around here (I haven't had luck finding one in training) and many of the hospital nurses are also doulas. I just wish I felt more confident that he isn't going to be a complete bonehead when it comes time. He just knows absolutely nothing about birth and doesn't seem all that interested to learn unless I send him direct links/videos or force him into a class. Now all the classes are full until after I am due. 

[smock]

It's not a video, but would he read a book? Mr. Smock has "The Birth Partner," which has a ton of info about birth and how to support a woman in labor. It's apparently also used by doulas.

[marie3246]

Jan 27, 2014 7:59:00 GMT -5 MNH2013 said:

Can you check you hospitals website? Or hospitals that are close to you? Mine offers some online. We just went to our first class last night.

Yep, I checked all area hospitals and all the classes except  CPR and breastfeeding and hospital tour are sold out or not offered until after my due date. We mostly didn't sign up earlier because most of our friends said it was a huge waste of money and they didn't gain anything from the childbirth classes. We are taking the CPR in a week or 2. We also did take a class on what to do after the baby and that was helpful for H since he now knows what a swaddle is, but we also watched a video at home that was a good bit better than the expensive class. 

[marie3246]

Jan 27, 2014 7:47:31 GMT -5 smock said:

It's not a video, but would he read a book? Mr. Smock has "The Birth Partner," which has a ton of info about birth and how to support a woman in labor. It's apparently also used by doulas.

I heard good things about this. Ill order it, he says he will read it, but I'm not sure how much of it he actually will. 

[VillainV]

I don't know of any, but online classes are probably a really good idea, or at least looking at online resources. Maybe watch some YouTube videos of births?

We also just hired a doula, mostly because we both feel like neither of us know what we're doing, so extra support would be nice. We also really like the idea that a doula will help to empower HIM to help me, promoting te idea I a partnership between the two of us (instead o him feeling powerless to help).

[marie3246]

Jan 27, 2014 8:18:35 GMT -5 MNH2013 said:

Jan 27, 2014 8:02:34 GMT -5 marie3246 said:

Yep, I checked all area hospitals and all the classes except  CPR and breastfeeding and hospital tour are sold out or not offered until after my due date. We mostly didn't sign up earlier because most of our friends said it was a huge waste of money and they didn't gain anything from the childbirth classes. We are taking the CPR in a week or 2. We also did take a class on what to do after the baby and that was helpful for H since he now knows what a swaddle is, but we also watched a video at home that was a good bit better than the expensive class. 

Sorry it's early so I wasn't clear and my grammar was off. My hospital offers online classes on their website free of charge for people who's schedule doesn't work with the in-person classes. No special code or anything to access. They are the same videos they show in the class just without the discussion part.

Oh that is awesome! My hospital doesn't offer anything online  

[marie3246]

Jan 27, 2014 8:21:32 GMT -5 VillainV said:

I don't know of any, but online classes are probably a really good idea, or at least looking at online resources. Maybe watch some YouTube videos of births?

We also just hired a doula, mostly because we both feel like neither of us know what we're doing, so extra support would be nice. We also really like the idea that a doula will help to empower HIM to help me, promoting te idea I a partnership between the two of us (instead o him feeling powerless to help).

I found some on baby center that look good, we did watch the business of giving birth and if we weren't having a hospital birth, I think it would have been really helpful. It mostly just scared me  Im going to call around to doula's today and see if its even an option or if I am too late. I had never thought about it before, but now that I am almost 36 weeks and I feel like we have no idea what we are doing, I do feel like someone could help. H is really good if I tell him exactly what to do, but I don't to be in labor and having to be explaining to him how he can help me (especially since I don't really know!)

[D2M]

I feel like if you go into this with the attitude that your H will not be a good support for you, it's going to overshadow how you perceive his actions on the day of. Your H will not be delivering your baby; your nurses and doctor will be. You need him to be there for you and to encourage you. This is just basic marriage/trust stuff. He -- and you two together -- will be fine. Get him the Birth Partner and read some passages together. My husband also recently just ordered The Complete Idiot's Guide to Being a New Dad, which one of his good friends recommended.

[humanzee]

I agree with D2M. I think the key is just good communication between you and H. It's hard to say what you'll want from your H until you're in the moment. We didn't take any classes, but when I was in labor, I wanted my husband to be present, but to pretty much stay out of the way and let me focus on dealing with the pain myself. I didn't want him touching me or coaching me. I never got to the point of pushing (ended up with a C section), but I am confident that the nurses would have provided plenty of guidance on ways for him to help if we'd gotten to that point.

That said, if the peace of mind from hiring a doula will make you feel more comfortable and confident and will reduce your stress in the days leading up to labor, I think it's worth the expense.