OMFG you guys I have to vent here. I couldn't be more pissed at dh right now.
I was up 3x with DS last night, was awake at 5:45, out the door by 7am, didn't get home till 6:30 this evening. I am exhausted. I was just wrapping up feeding him at 9:15 (after giving him his bath) when dh announces he is going to bed. WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK. I kind of can't believe he is going to bed early leaving me to put DS down for the night. LIVID.
I am so flabbergasted that he actually went to bed that I can't even bring myself to say anything for fear of creating the biggest fight this house has ever seen.
I would say something. Being pissed will only make it harder for you to fall asleep . I had to very explicitly tell DH exactly what I needed to stay sane -- he just didn't get it. I've also done nearly all night wakings G's whole life since sleep deprived DH is useless and annoying. But I have insisted on at least one weekend catch up day for sleeping in. I sometimes let him sleep in the other weekend day as long as I'm feeling ok but sometimes claim both days after a really bad week. That works for me, but what's most important here is what YOU need to function. He needs to help you get to that point.
I would say something. Being pissed will only make it harder for you to fall asleep . I had to very explicitly tell DH exactly what I needed to stay sane -- he just didn't get it. I've also done nearly all night wakings G's whole life since sleep deprived DH is useless and annoying. But I have insisted on at least one weekend catch up day for sleeping in. I sometimes let him sleep in the other weekend day as long as I'm feeling ok but sometimes claim both days after a really bad week. That works for me, but what's most important here is what YOU need to function. He needs to help you get to that point.
This. When it was just one baby, I did 110% of the work MOTN, but I got the weekends, and I would TAKE those weekends sleeping in.
Men have a harder time adjusting to babies, and seriously need a huge kick in the pants. I'd wait until you are both fairly rested to have a talk and lay out what needs to be done and who is able to do what. No early bedtimes without checking with the other, first.
I'm sorry. Sleep depravation is so hard, especially when you have to work. I hope you're able to talk to your H today and he gets it. Having a baby has been so hard on our marriage, all annoyances are just amplified by the huge changes. Hugs.
I didn't end up having a conversation with him last night, but I was a bit passive aggressive in that when I went up to get ready for bed I wasn't quiet, left the lights on, which was probably unproductive of me but whatever. And thank goodness the baby did sleep a good long stretch and only woke once to eat. I will probably bring up this issue sometime in the next couple days. I don't work tomorrow and Friday so I can get dh to help overnight and get caught back up on sleep.
I didn't end up having a conversation with him last night, but I was a bit passive aggressive in that when I went up to get ready for bed I wasn't quiet, left the lights on, which was probably unproductive of me but whatever. And thank goodness the baby did sleep a good long stretch and only woke once to eat. I will probably bring up this issue sometime in the next couple days. I don't work tomorrow and Friday so I can get dh to help overnight and get caught back up on sleep.
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I'm glad you got sleep, but passive aggressive is not good for your marriage! Can you at least tell your DH that you're having a rough time and that you need his help to come up with solutions? It doesn't have to be a fight -- maybe he'll have some good suggestions. It's SO HARD with a baby in the house changing your relationship dynamics. We've been through several rough patches mostly due to increased stress and lack of sleep and they suck. I hope you guys get back on the same page soon!