So I've decided we really need a nanny with a car. (for those that don't know my nanny commutes by bike and our bus system isn't awesome) Do I tell our current nanny what we need and ask her if she's interested in finding a car and keeping her position or do I let her go because she doesn't have a car?
Would you be willing to buy a car for her to use while she works for you? My boss used to provide his nanny with a car because hers was unreliable. When she left the job, she also had to give up the car. If you like your nanny and would keep her otherwise, it might be worth the investment.
I realize this doesn't answer your question, but it would eliminate having to ask it.
30 days But I think it is kind of "mean" that you hired her without the requirement. You should have thought of this back then and listed it as a requirement of hiring her.
30 days But I think it is kind of "mean" that you hired her without the requirement. You should have thought of this back then and listed it as a requirement of hiring her.
But I was only working pt so I had 2 days to take the girls to classes or activities. I don't have that option now.
30 days But I think it is kind of "mean" that you hired her without the requirement. You should have thought of this back then and listed it as a requirement of hiring her.
But I was only working pt so I had 2 days to take the girls to classes or activities. I don't have that option now.
I would have a conversation with her. Tell her what you've told us - now that you're working full time, you really want the kids to be able to leave the house a couple of days a week and you need a nanny with a car. Tell her you are happy with her and would like to keep her as your nanny (assuming this is true), but that you'd like to figure out a way for her to be able to drive. Find out what she thinks and if she's willing to do this.
I think it would be helpful if you could either provide her with a car to use (can you take the bus or carpool with your DH on days the nanny needs a car and let her use yours?) or some assistance in purchasing one. IMO asking her to buy a car quickly means she will either be unable to do that OR she'll buy a beater and you'll have to think about whether or not you want your kids being driven around in a potentially unsafe car. I think if it were me I'd try to make an arrangement for her to drive my car rather than expecting her to buy her own (or buy her something reliable, but I realize that may not be financially possible for everyone, certainly wouldn't be for me!).
"Nanny, we love working with you, you are great with the girls, yada yada yada nice stuff to start. Now that I'm working full time again circumstances have changed and we have decided we need a nanny with a vehicle that is able to transport the girls to activities several times a week. We would really like to keep you on as their nanny, but in order to do so it will be necessary for you to bring a vehicle to work. We realize this is asking a lot from you and we understand if it's simply not possible at this time. We are willing to offer you ___ weeks pay as severance if you aren't able to acquire a car by ___ date."
i think it's a lot to ask of her. she's single and preparing for a baby and cars cost a lot. even if you reimburse her gas/mileage for required activities she has to pay for gas to/from your house, oil changes, maintenance, etc. i'm guessing that will be really tight on a nanny salary.
So I gather you don't want to provide her with a car? Are you looking for a way to get her to quit, or to get rid of her? Won't it be a bit suspect of you to all of a sudden come up with this deal-breaking requirement right after she tells you she's pregnant?
So I gather you don't want to provide her with a car? Are you looking for a way to get her to quit, or to get rid of her? Won't it be a bit suspect of you to all of a sudden come up with this deal-breaking requirement right after she tells you she's pregnant?
This!
How far away is your work from home? IDK if the logistics of this would work for you, but could she drive your car? If public transit isn't great where you are, maybe she could be your chauffeur to and from work? Or maybe she could bike to your work to pick up the car? If it is only a few days a week that might work, but those ideas might be more trouble than it is worth if you live far away from work.....
but are you upset with her b/c of the pg or is this really about the car? and won't this be a moot point for DD1 next month with school?
No, it actually becomes more important then. E is in school in the afternoons and I want the girls to be able to go places in the morning. The timing with her pregnancy sucks, but it is really just coincidence and is probably the one thing that makes me hesitate. I feel guilty about the possibility of her losing her job when I know she's pg
You did not require it before. Now that she's pregnant, you require it. It is really suspect, protest how you will.
I agree w/ this. You have posted a lot about your concerns w/ her pregnancy and now are requiring a car when it wasn't an issue before? I get that there have been changes to your schedule, but it does seem questionable.
If she is a good nanny, I think that you should do what you can to provide a car for her (purchase a car for her to use, have her drop you off, etc). I just think that it is somewhat unrealistic to demand that she suddenly spend thousands of dollars when this wasn't a previous consideration.
I know someone once recommended consulting w/ a lawyer on this whole situation. Did you ever do that?
I will say that your posts make me never want to have employees!
Post by vanillacourage on Jul 6, 2012 1:15:22 GMT -5
I think you're probably better off addressing the actual problem (lack of activities outside the house) and ask her to brainstorm with you how you can address it. Maybe she knows another nanny (or you know someone from a moms group) who can rideshare. Maybe you can rent a car one week a month, etc. But demanding that your pregnant nanny buy a car to haul your kids around by a certain date or else she's fired, when that's never been an issue before, does make you vulnerable to a lawsuit even if that's totally not your intention. If you do push this I'd consider consulting with an attorney first. Sorry.
Let me add a twist - I hope you are paying her "over the table" and handling the taxes correctly. If you change the requirements of the job so much that she can't possibly meet them and then she is let go, she could file for unemployment. That is how the majority of people are caught paying under the table.
I work in HR and we tell managers that perception is everything. You may be telling the absolute truth that the car issue and her pregnancy have nothing to do with each other. She could tell a convincing story - that you are discriminating against her because of her pregnancy. That could be a problem for you.
Your nanny may well end up quitting when her baby comes. If she does, that will be your opportunity to add a personal car to the job requirements. At this point, you should provide a car for her or figure out other transportation options.
You did not require it before. Now that she's pregnant, you require it. It is really suspect, protest how you will.
That said, it is likely she will have to get a car shortly anyway; she is not going to be able to bike around the city with a baby. Is she a good nanny? If she is, wouldn't it be better to just get a third car? If she's a sucky nanny, you should not keep her on.
You realize plenty of people bike with babies and never get a vehicle, right?
I know that everyone thinks I'm doing this because she's pg, but I'm not. It just happens that she announced her pregnancy the same week that I went back to work full time and in the 2 weeks since it's really become obvious that her not having a car kind of sucks for my kids. I spoke to her yesterday about her plans once she's too uncomfortable to ride (her words) and her plan is the bus. I know that buying a car isn't in her plans. I think that for the time being we're going to tell her that it's becoming more apparent that it would be convenient for her to be able to drive and we'd like her to practice her skills so that she can drive one of our cars a couple times a week (I have a call into our insurance company to see how that works) and we'll see how that works. Maybe it was short sighted on our part to think this wouldn't become an issue, but things change and this has. I also was under the assumption (based on conversations) that she would be able to bike with the kids and right she claims she could only handle 2-3 miles with them because of how tired she is. I didn't want to come back FT, but my employer didn't really give me a choice and so our needs are changing. I don't think it's unreasonable of me to expect her to change somewhat as well.
As a former nanny, I totally get where you are coming from. In the past, employers have bought a car for me to use while working (usually a lower end but safe sedan) and added me to their insurance policy. I did have my own car and drove it to work, but once there, I used their vehicles.
Is it possible for her to drive you to work and use your car for the day? This way, the kids get out of the house, you don't have to buy a vehicle, and she isn't required to buy one either.
The timing is unfortunate. But really, asking her to buy a car is unreasonable.
I was going to ask if she can drive and chooses not to, or cannot for some reason (like my DH can't have a driver's license because of his vision - he would be a perfectly capable childcare provider though).
I think letting her use your car if she's able to drive is a good proposal. I nannied without being able to drive (was too young for a license) but the town was completely walkable with the kids. The mom always left me a key to her car in case there was an emergency or something - she preferred I drive them to the hospital than wait on an ambulance.
30 days But I think it is kind of "mean" that you hired her without the requirement. You should have thought of this back then and listed it as a requirement of hiring her.
When I hired our nanny, it wasn't a requirement. But it absolutely would be now. We love our nanny, so we probably would have made it work. But there's a lot going on with OP's nanny/schedule. I don't think it's mean. OP do you have a contract with a term for notice? If so, that's how long I would give her.
I'm surprised that people think this should be an employer expense. I guess given the circumstances that it makes sense. But our nanny drives her own car, as do many other nannies in our neighborhood. We pay her mileage.
I was kind of surprised too, when I was a nanny I supplied my own car. BUT it does make sense that I can't expect her to just produce a car out of thin air. We definitely won't be buying her a car.
Post by expatpumpkin on Jul 6, 2012 9:51:04 GMT -5
I would tread very lightly before letting her go. It could be really difficult for a pregnant (and carless) nanny to find a new position. You could very well find yourself in a wrongful dismissal suit.