How do/will you explain you and your spouse to the

[theaterfreak]

Just curious what works you will use and will you wait until they ask.

Addison (my daugher) loves GF and will say "is she part of our family?). Once she asked if GF ever had a husband. I answer questions as they come but I am still kind of unsure how I will really totally explain it.

[cymru]

I think for me it is different than in your situation. My daughter has never known anything other than having two moms. She knows other kids have daddys, but she just takes that in stride in the same way as she does all differences between her and other kids.

As she gets older and has questions I guess I will just adress them as the arrive. I don't see any reason to sit down and have a big talk about why her family is different because of her moms.

[twotrue]

Jul 6, 2012 10:29:24 GMT -5 cymru said:

I think for me it is different than in your situation. My daughter has never known anything other than having two moms. She knows other kids have daddys, but she just takes that in stride in the same way as she does all differences between her and other kids.

As she gets older and has questions I guess I will just adress them as the arrive. I don't see any reason to sit down and have a big talk about why her family is different because of her moms.

Yup.

[Deleted]

Jul 6, 2012 10:29:24 GMT -5 cymru said:

I think for me it is different than in your situation. My daughter has never known anything other than having two moms. She knows other kids have daddys, but she just takes that in stride in the same way as she does all differences between her and other kids.

As she gets older and has questions I guess I will just adress them as the arrive. I don't see any reason to sit down and have a big talk about why her family is different because of her moms.

This. A has 3 moms and 1 dad but she has taken everything in stride, she has never known me in a relationship with a man besides what I've explained to her about her father and how I came to find out that I am gay. We don't feel the need to sit down and have a big talk with the other kids unless they have questions.

[bluedaisyus]

Our situation isn't the same. He's never had any different: we were both there when he was conceived, when he was born, and have been here for his whole life up to this point, and he knows his family has two mommies. If he asks questions later (which I'm sure he will just like any other kid does) then we'll answer them, but at this point I feel there isn't really anything to explain to him about something that's totally normal.

[theaterfreak]

I hear what you are saying and my ped says there isn't anything to clarify yet. I am talking about things like.....explaining romantic love to them.

I feel like we will eventually have to have a talk about who we fall in love with (woman as opposed to me), boy/girl relationships vs. ours.



I am just thinking.....I have a friend who is gay and adopted a little girl from china and when she was in first grade she told her classmates her mom is a lesbian.

[bluedaisyus]

Ah, gotcha, I misunderstood. Well, he's 2 1/2 so I think/hope it'll be a loooooooong time before I have to explain that to him. At this point I honestly have no idea what I'd say. I'd probably focus on feelings and general affection, and not so much on the physical aspects of things, depending on how old he is. But I think I would do that even if I was straight/bi and with a man.

[ElsaVonM]

I think our family and friends will be a good model - there are all kinds of families right there for them to see - married, unmarried, gay, straight - and it will just seem natural to them that some men fall in love with men and others with women, and the same for women. If they ask for labels, we'll provide them.

[Deleted]

Ok gotcha. From the very beginning of A's life I have kept an open dialogue about different relationships, man/man, woman/woman, man/woman, and how everybody is different and it's ok to love whoever you feel you love.

I make a point to let the kids know that all relationships are equal and have the same things going on in them, we all love, fight, kiss, do the dishes, share a bed, laugh, cry, and make families together regardless of being gay, straight or what have you. I let the kids know that I don't know who they are going to like and eventually love but whether they are gay or straight makes no difference to me, I only care that they are happy and in a respectful relationship.