I'm sorry that you and H have had such a hard time lately; that must have been really difficult on you. While I think it's always a little sad when a relationship ends, it sounds like you guys are approaching this from a position of respect and consideration for each other, and that you're making the decision that is right for both of you. And you know what? Sometimes relationships just need to end. My parents should have divorced very early in their marriage; instead, they stayed married for 25 years. And, um, that worked out well for exactly no one. So in that sense, I hope y'all are proud of each other for speaking up and making a change - plenty of couples don't, and lo, it is awful.
Amicable divorces take balls. I went through it. It was terrifying, but we pressed on. We are both so, so, SO much happier now and I have the utmost respect for my ex...much more than when we were married.
Post by underwaterrhymes on Feb 7, 2014 8:17:25 GMT -5
I'm sorry.
I just want to tell you that although both H's and my parents' respective divorces were hard on the parents and kids at the time, in the end it was best for everybody. I am so grateful my parents are no longer together. Lilly will be just fine. She has two parents who love her very much. ((hugs))
I'm sorry, Jez. I have a feeling, in the long run (big picture) it will be for the best. I know you've expressed being unhappy for awhile. I hope you find your happiness.
Hugs to you and to Lilly. She will be fine, I agree with the PP about counseling for YOU. This will be a much bigger adjustment for you than it will be for your daughter. Kids are very resilient. DD was 3 when ex-h and I divorced, and she is 17 now and always talks about how this is just her life, she doesnt really know any better. Everyone is much better off too! Good Luck!
I'm so sorry Jez. Going through something similar myself right now, I can tell you that it's incredibly hard and sucky at times, but you'll come out the other side so much better. You'll find strength you didn't know you had.
L will be ok. It's better to have happy, divorced parents than unhappy, married ones. My parents were married, unhappily, for 35 years and are actually separated now. It was not a great situation for my brother and I growing up.
If you need anything, please PM me. I was a regular in ye olden days of TK. <3
And I know others have suggested it, but I will say it too: Get into counseling for yourself. I know he won't go, but there is not reason why you can't. My therapist has helped me through so much of this process, even if all she does during some sessions is listen to me babble. She helped me find the strength I needed.