Who has kids less than 2 years apart?

[turtlegirl]

DH was pushing kids closers together. I never went on BC after weaning DS1 at 6 months. We thought we'd try when DS1 turned 1. We concieved the weekend he turned 1. Kinda planned, just happened a month before we were going to officially start trying.

The boys are 20 months apart and started playing very well together when DS2 was about 14/15 months old. They fight daily, but play well together 80% of the time. Age 3 and 18 months now.

I felt insane for about the first 9 months of DS2's life. It was a lot of work and DH is in school 3 nights a week on top of working full time, so I do a lot of solo parenting. But since then it's been fairly easy.

I have no idea if people judge me. Mostly just comments about their reddish hair and how cute they are. Our closest couple friends all have kids close together (ranging from 14 months apart to 2.5 yrs apart). So we are usually in good company.

Overall it's hard in the beginning, but very fun now. But if we do have #3 there will be more of a 2.5-3yr age difference.

[turtlegirl]

That argument never made much sense to me. The younger sibling never gets that "alone" time. I think it's pretty cool that DS1 doesn't even really remember being an only child. They are always doing everything together and love each other so much. It's amazing to watch.

[bunch]

Was it planned? Yes. They are 22 mos apart

Do the kids get along? So far dd2 (8mos) looooves dd1. Dd1 goes back and forth between bringing her toys and trying to step on her hands or ride her. So tbd.

Did you feel insane? Or are two just kind of as much work as one? I was fine when dd2 was a newborn. I'm having a harder time now that she's mobile and doesn't sleep as much. I expect it to get better in a few mos when dd2 isn't getting hurt as often and dd1 gets used to getting her toys stolen.

Do people judge you? What? It they do I'm not aware.

[brady2012]

Feb 16, 2014 13:33:04 GMT -5 @bunnybean said:

Tell me about your experiences, if you don't mind.

Was it planned?

Do the kids get along?

Did you feel insane? Or are two just kind of as much work as one?

Do people judge you?

Just sort of talking/thinking this out.

Our are 22.5 months apart. It was planned because we were 35 and wanted to be done having babies. We dont feel insane, just divide and conquer. Not being outnumbered makes it doable.

No one judges us but they are 22 months apart so that may be why. My kids get along great. My daughter was old enough to understand she was getting a brother when he was born but not old enough to be jealous. She loves him more than anything and vice versa. Now that he is crawling they are starting to play together and its pretty amazing to watch.

[ilikedonuts]

My kids are 2 years and 1 day apart. We started TTC when DD1 was like 9 months old.

Was it planned? Yes

Do the kids get along? They are almost 28 and 4 months old right now and DD1 absolutely adores her baby sister. We've been super lucky *knock on wood*

Did you feel insane? Or are two just kind of as much work as one? I feel like right away I got in the swing of 2 kids. DD2 just kind of slid on into the flow of stuff on our days. She was a bit fussy in the beginning, but she very much is a go with the flow baby as long as she's fed. I'm a SAHM and make it a goal to go somewhere every day or at least 4 out of the 5 weekdays with the kids. I've been doing this since DD1 was a week old. I think that definitely shocked people.

Do people judge you? No, but out of all my mommy group friends most have 2+ years between kids. 1 has 18 months betwee and then 3 of us are right about at 2 years. So many of the moms seemed scared to see how the few of us would handle it.

I would definitely not change how far apart I had them, but I will say if I wasn't already pregnant when DD1 was 15-19 months old I would not have gotten pregnant any time soon. That was a rough time for her then so I was glad I was pregnant but not about to or had already given birth to DD2 then.

[spidervain]

Feb 16, 2014 13:33:04 GMT -5 @bunnybean said:

Tell me about your experiences, if you don't mind.

Was it planned?

Do the kids get along?

Did you feel insane? Or are two just kind of as much work as one?

Do people judge you?

Just sort of talking/thinking this out.

Our oldest 2 are 15 months apart. It was planned. They get along most of the time. I did not feel insane until we had our third and I could no longer referee the older 2 as easily. Going from one to two was not much of an adjustment.

[beefjerky]

Feb 16, 2014 13:33:04 GMT -5 @bunnybean said:

Tell me about your experiences, if you don't mind.

Was it planned? Kind of? We didn't plan on it right away, I was still breastfeeding and never had a cycle. Got pregnant the weekend of DS1 first birthday. DS1 and DS2 are 21 months apart.

Do the kids get along? LOL, they are each others best friend and worst enemy at times The first 2 years really are a blur (which is probably why there is a 6 year gap in between DS2 and DS3, ha!). They do get along. Sometimes DH and I will sit on the steps when they go to bed and just listen to them talking in their room like little old men or reading books together.

Did you feel insane? Or are two just kind of as much work as one? For me 2 was waaaaay more work than 1. 1-2 was the hardest transition for me.

Do people judge you? Oh gosh, I'm sure. Who knows

Just sort of talking/thinking this out.

[Deleted]

Tell me about your experiences, if you don't mind.

Was it planned?

Nope. We wanted two years between them and instead we have just under 16 months. Mine are 7 months and 23 months right now.

Do the kids get along?

So far they adore each other. DS2 is the first thing DS1 asks for when he wakes. DS2 lights up when his brother comes in the room. They'll actually sit and play together now for short periods of time (ie DS1 handing his brother toys or "reading" to him).

Did you feel insane? Or are two just kind of as much work as one?

Hard to say. Some days are really hard, some seem easy. Two makes just one kid look super easy but when I had just one I was overwhelmed.

Do people judge you?

Maybe? A lot of people ask if my second was planned. My sister and I are only 18 months apart (planned) so my family doesn't say much about it but H and his sister are 3 years apart and my in laws were pretty surprised.

Just sort of talking/thinking this out.

I love it. I would not have planned this (18-21 months were really hard with DS1) but we've hit a really good stride right now and I love seeing them together.

[karissa]

Our girls are 19mths apart, right now 18mths and just over 3

Was it planned? Yes, it was planned. My sister is 20mth younger and brother is 15mths older and I liked the idea of the kids close together. I also like the idea of moving through the baby stage all at once. That being said we haven't decided on a third or not. Since we are on the fence, if we go for a third we would have more spacing because of life situations right now. New job, new city, small rental.

Do the kids get along? They get along most of the time. Some bickering over toys but no more than any siblings I think. It is cute watching them play together so well.

Did you feel insane? Or are two just kind of as much work as one? Sometimes it is pretty chaotic, especially that first year. My husband's job was pretty demanding the first year as well though and I was still working full time. It seems to get easier and easier as time goes on.

Do people judge you? I don't know that they judge, but I think we scared some of our good friends into further spacing their children. They are generally less ok with chaos at home though.

Overall I love that they are close in age. We would make the same decision if we had to do it over. If we for sure wanted a third we probably would have already started planning TTC.

[holly116]

1 and 2 are 18 months apart; 2 and 3 are 19 months.
DD is 3 1/2, DS1 turned 2 last Friday and the baby, DS2, is 5 months tomorrow.

Was it planned? #2 was planned. Our first was such an easy baby, we decided to get go ahead and go for it. Mind you, she wasn't really mobile yet when I got pregnant with #2. #3 was a surprise and I knew exactly what I was in for and I was scared!

Do the kids get along? Yes, for the most part. My older two are really starting to hit a groove now that DS1 is completely steady on his feet and much more verbal. They do fight though. They often want exactly what the other one wants and they'll push each other down etc to get it. Good life lessons though lol. The good outweighs the bad and it's getting easier every day. Everyone loves the baby and hug on him all the time.

Did you feel insane? Or are two just kind of as much work as one? I was overwhelmed at first but that was mainly a bit of PPD/PPA from BF issues with #2. By six months of so I was fine. #3 has kicked my ass but I'm so in love with my kids at their different stages right now that it's balancing out.

Do people judge you? With 2? No. With 3? I would say yes. I feel a bit like a freak show when we're out and about. I can't tell you how many times I heard that whole "you have your hands full, har har!" Super annoying. Everyone make a mental note, no one wants to hear that!

We're far apart in my family - I'll be 32 soon, my sister is 25 and my brother turns 18 next month. So my mom thinks I am certifiably insane, but you know what, I wanted my kids to have close siblings. I also felt a bit lonely growing up. I love that my kids are never alone and will always gave each other. Their childhoods are so rich. My baby has so much going on in his little world. Really, it's a blessing and such a gift for your kids. Life is crazy right now but I really wouldn't do it any other way.

[pescalita]

21m apart. Not planned.

I/we were freaked out at first. We had planned on more like three years.

There's a little logistical hurdle, things like neither of our cars fit two RF car seats, A has been forced out of things like the crib and the high chair faster than he would have naturally. We probably end up spending a little more on things that overlap.

I'm thrilled with it though. We're done and through a lot of the hard parts. A didn't know what was going on enough to have trouble with the adjustment and he adores J and can even be helpful. It's balls to the walls insane, but I feel like that's more from having two small kids, not necessarily two small kids 21m apart.

FWIW, I got two easy babies, even though J is not a great sleeper. I was afraid #2 would be payback and he's not.

[honeybadger]

Thank you SO much for asking this.  We just found out we are pregnant with #2--Little HB will be 23 months when Baby #2 is born.  My siblings and I are all very close (Brother <--18 mo -> Sister <-- 18 mo -> Me <-- 15 mo --> Sister), so I know it has some definite up sides, but I've heard so many horror stories re: close in age lately...  This was very comforting to read.  So THANK YOU!

[MadamePresident]

Mine will be 21 months apart. We weren't trying, but weren't avoiding. No one has judged us, since many of our friends also have kids that close together.

Since the 2nd isn't born yet, I'm not sure how it will be.

[Jalapeñomel]

I would imagine it would be expensive to have two kids in diapers and in daycare.

I always thought I'd have two close together...we will see, because as of right now, I'm ok with just one.

[salliekate]

The twins and my third are 11 months apart. It was not planned, at all. I had one PP period and was so excited that my body was working again (we had trouble getting pregnant the first time) that I didn't want to go back on the pill immediately. Ha. Ha. Joke's on me. 

I'm sure people judge, but whatever. My kids are happy and healthy so what the hell do I care? My parents thought we were nuts (my sisters and I are all 2.5 years apart), but they love our kids. 

I feel insane most of the time. I think it's a combination of having three kids, having three small kids so close in age, being a reluctant SAHM, and having some PPD/PPA. But, when you add another person to your family - especially a person who needs so much from you - things are bound to get a little more chaotic. Mostly it's a fun chaos. 

My kids are without a doubt each other's best friends. What could be more fun than living with your two best friends?? They have the most ridiculous imaginations and play really well together. Obviously they fight sometimes and scream and pitch fits and have attitudes (they are 2.5, 3.5, and 3.5) and those times are rough...really rough. I've decided that there are pros and cons to whatever spacing you choose (or whatever spacing happens). And most parents end up liking whatever spacing they have. 

Good luck with your decision. It's so hard to decide when to go for it.

[jlt19]

Mine are 2 years and 9 days apart.

Most definitely not planned.

They get along. My DD (3.5) adores him (1.5).

I did feel insane when I found out I was pregnant. We were just getting to an easy, routine like stage with DD and it changed everything. I finally feel like we're getting back to that point again. Though #2 wasn't that hard, I hadn't forgotten a lot, and was way more relaxed. The infant phase flew by this time, which was good for me since it's my least favorite phase.

I honestly think it's easier on the kids when they don't realize what they've lost. My sister was 6 when I was born and she resented me for years. DD was 2 and she has NO memory of being an only child. I think that's best, honestly.

I don't think anyone judged us. Most said the age difference is ideal.

[SpartanGirl]

Was it planned?
Yes and no. We wanted 2 under 2 for all of the kids, but I admit that #4 was a "whoops." My kids are 27 months, 21 months, and 15 months apart.

Do the kids get along?
They go through cycles. DD1 and DS can be best buds or worst enemies. Same for DD2 and DD3. We have 4 kids though so if one pair of kids isn't getting along they can just go play with someone else. I feel like the issues they have are more related to being siblings than they are to closeness in age. I'm curious to see what it will be like when DD2 and DD3 get older though since they will only be one year apart in school. There is a potential for a lot of overlap in friends and activities.

Did you feel insane? Or are two just kind of as much work as one?
There were times that it felt insane, but we kept having them close together so it couldn't have been too bad. lol! I felt the transition from 1-2 kids was the hardest of all, but that probably had to do with personality of the kids. DS was a very difficult baby. When DD3 was born we had 3 kids in diapers. That was rough (and expensive). DD2 and DD3 being so close together was hard, but it didn't last forever (and so much of it is a blur). It's much easier now that they're both a little older.

Do people judge you?
I have no idea. I don't really think about it.

[whitepicketfence]

My first two are 18 months apart. It was planned as I was a SAHM at the time and we figured that the closer the age gap, the sooner I could return to work. We were initially planning to TTC after DD1's 1st birthday but threw caution to the wind when she was 9 months old and got pregnant on the first try.

I don't think it got difficult until DD2 became mobile and I had two kids that were into everything. DD1 was too young to really experience any jealousy when her sister was born. DD1 was just starting to STTN when DD2 was born so I was used to the sleep deprivation by then. TBH, DD1 didn't really have any interest in her sister until DD2 was closer to year old because then they could interact and play more.

They are 4 and 2.5 now and I love it. They are the best of friends and love each other so much. They hate being apart. They fight a lot, but they also play together constantly and entertain each other, too. It's also much easier now that DD1 is so much more independent. She also goes to preschool 3 mornings a week so I get to spend some quality alone time with DD2.

With all that said, we did opt to space DD2 and DD3 further apart. I don't think I have the energy for 2u2 again.