WWYD re: animal welfare

[Deleted]

This is long. Sorry. 

Most of you are aware that I have horses and a donkey. Well, my aunt has a donkey and a sheep that she's had for at least 10-15 years. She used to raise goats but got out of it when the babies started dying from what the vet said was something in the soil. After that, she pretty much neglected all of them. There was a lot of goats, 15-20 if not more. All of them have died off over the last 10 years. Anyway, donkey's, like horses, need hoof maintenance and H noticed one day that her donkey's hoofs are curved up, which for those of you who don't know about equine stuff, that's bad. I've seen worse but his hoofs are still not in good shape. My property borders her property and only a fence is separating me from seeing him everyday.  

So, about 2-3 months ago, our farrier came to care for our mini's and donkey. Two weeks prior to this I had contacted her to see if she would want to get her donkey's hoofs trimmed. She said she would have to check with my uncles work schedule and she would get back to me. A week later, nothing. So I message her again, and she says she forgot and she'll get back to me. Basically I keep getting put off until the weekend when the farrier is to visit and that Friday she had stated that my uncle had to work so they couldn't do it. (the donkey is kind of wild) Well, the day of, I notice my uncle IS home so I call her and she sounds sick (she was) and says they can't do it even though H, me, and the farrier would have gladly helped wrangle him in. I don't know if she lied to me or she got the days mixed up and I'm disappointed, but I somewhat understand. 

After that H and I decide we would like to buy him off of them so that we can get him taken care of. I wait about two weeks after the farrier incident so that she doesn't take it personally. I message her over FB and ask her about buying him from her. She says she has to talk to my uncle about it and she'll get back to me. After a week, no reply. See a pattern? So I message her again, asking what my uncle has said. She then says that it takes him a long time to decide things and she'll let me know. A week later, after no reply, I message again, and I get nothing back so I message her again about 5 days later. She says she'll let me know the next day and of course, I heard nothing back. Keep in mind my messages were polite and not accusatory at all just straight forward and nice.  

Now, I haven't contacted her back and it's been about 3 weeks. I don't know what to do. Not only are his hoofs a mess, but he doesn't look like he's getting enough food. They put out two round bales of hay for him and the few others but with the weather I'm sure some of it has molded and they won't eat it then (and shouldn't). I'm also pretty sure he's not getting grain, which is something they should have in the winter. I don't know for a fact but I'm basing this on what I see. I'm at a loss at what to do. I don't want to call the SPCA because it's going to be pretty obvious on who did it. 

I used to look up to this aunt as well. I've lost a lot of respect for her over the last few months which makes me feel bad because she's been through some lift altering stuff in the last year however, that's been over for a while. She also was very slack in my grandmother's care when she was alive. My gma needed to be in a home and my aunt had power of attorney. She wasn't getting paperwork done to get her into a home and it was becoming a strain on all the siblings, mostly my dad. She didn't pay my gma's bills after she was in the home and what was left after she died at the nursing home was used to pay those bills. 

So, advice? I feel the only thing I can really do is the next time the farrier comes to do our horses is to see if she wants to get her donkey's hoof trimmed. 



tl;dr
My aunt isn't taking care of her donkey and after multiple attempts to help out the donkey, she won't get back to me on buying him so that H and I can take care of him.

[Deleted]

Why don't you talk to your Uncle instead?

[darkling_glory]

If your property borders hers, why don't you just go over there instead of messaging constantly?

Here's what I'd do- Bring them a check, tell them sympathetically that you know a donkey is a lot to care for and just act like it's a done deal.

Then call the farrier and get his hooves fixed asap! It's only going to get more expensive to treat. I'm sure you ALL know that.

[sergey]

Maybe swing by to chat in person or call on the phone where there's less of an opportunity to put you off for weeks? Another try and it may be time to get blunt.

[sydney02]

I see stuff like this a lot in the country where I am. Horses and other livestock that just aren't taken care of. And it's easy to ignore their needs when they are out on the north 40 and you don't have to see them every day. Usually offering money works. A lot of times just offering to take them works but money should do the trick.
I think the key is to never let your aunt know that you want the donkey because she isn't caring for it. That can make people defensive and not want to part with the animal out of spite. If you seem genuinely interested in purchasing the donkey and be kind of like, "Last chance to sell him Auntie Em or I'm going to buy a donkey somewhere else" she should be ready to give him up. If not, there probably isn't much you can do. I don't know what laws are by you but around here, cruelty laws are very lax with livestock.
GL

[hopecounts]

I'd go over and talk to her and uncle together.
It may be your uncle knows the problem is there but doesn't want to deal or she is putting him off (have you called the farrier? No I'll call tomorrow? I'm off x day why don't you get the farrier to come out? Sure I'll call) which he should just do it but maybe if there is a viable and excellent solution righ there he and you can get it taken care of.

[wysiwyg]

I would contact the uncle, because I have a sneaking suspicion that your aunt hasn't talked to him at all. Like Scotty said, I'd make sure to use the word 'neglect'.

[spitforspat]

Why do people have donkeys? As pets? Donkey milk?

[Deleted]

Time to be blunt.

"I've noticed your donkey is not getting proper care. It's become neglectful and I would like to help by purchasing the donkey instead of getting someone involved so he gets the treatment he deserves".

[Deleted]

Feb 21, 2014 12:27:54 GMT -5 spitforspat said:

Why do people have donkeys? As pets? Donkey milk?

For protection against coyotes and other predators.

[sydney02]

Feb 21, 2014 12:43:58 GMT -5 @otterama said:

Time to be blunt.

"I've noticed your donkey is not getting proper care. It's become neglectful and I would like to help by purchasing the donkey instead of getting someone involved so he gets the treatment he deserves".

 
She can be blunt with the uncle but I wouldn't say that to the aunt. I don't know what this woman is like but if she's like 99% of the farm people around here, they aren't going to let some young whippersnapper tell them how to take care of a donkey because they've been doing it since before she was born. There is such a closed minded, "I do what I want!" attitude that is prevalent in the country and any whiff of being concerned for one of their animals will result in them painting you as the PETA animal freak. I've seen it with doing dog and cat rescue as well. They will not be afraid of getting in trouble with animal control. It actually makes them want to hold on to the animal even more so they can "show you". 

Really I'd pretend I was in the market for a donkey, I really like her donkey and want to buy it but if she doesn't give it up soon, then I'll be moving on to purchase another donkey. Try that approach first. Then get down and dirty if you must. 

spitforspat people around here have donkey as companion animals for horses, or livestock guardians for sheep, cattle, chickens. Donkeys make excellent guardians and will run off coyotes from herds. Plus they are awesome pets. I have two horses  but really donkeys IMO run circles around horses in terms of intelligence and personality. They make you realize what pea brains horses really are. Plus donkeys are badass and don't have near the spookiness horses have. They give no fucks. 

[Serenity9]

[zzuvet]

Feb 21, 2014 12:27:54 GMT -5 spitforspat said:

Why do people have donkeys? As pets? Donkey milk?

Donkeys are really popular to show. They also are great for protecting a herd of small ruminants from predators. They are also fun pets.

[spitforspat]

Ahh...very cool! Thanks.

[Deleted]

Feb 21, 2014 12:26:59 GMT -5 wysiwyg said:

I would contact the uncle, because I have a sneaking suspicion that your aunt hasn't talked to him at all. Like Scotty said, I'd make sure to use the word 'neglect'.

You may be right. I thought the same thing. I'm not very close to my uncle so that's why I only talked to her. My uncle is quiet and haven't really ever talked to him one on one. I'll talk to H and see what he wants to do.

[Deleted]

Feb 21, 2014 12:58:53 GMT -5 sydney02 said:

Feb 21, 2014 12:43:58 GMT -5 @otterama said:

Time to be blunt.

"I've noticed your donkey is not getting proper care. It's become neglectful and I would like to help by purchasing the donkey instead of getting someone involved so he gets the treatment he deserves".

 
She can be blunt with the uncle but I wouldn't say that to the aunt. I don't know what this woman is like but if she's like 99% of the farm people around here, they aren't going to let some young whippersnapper tell them how to take care of a donkey because they've been doing it since before she was born. There is such a closed minded, "I do what I want!" attitude that is prevalent in the country and any whiff of being concerned for one of their animals will result in them painting you as the PETA animal freak. I've seen it with doing dog and cat rescue as well. They will not be afraid of getting in trouble with animal control. It actually makes them want to hold on to the animal even more so they can "show you". 

Really I'd pretend I was in the market for a donkey, I really like her donkey and want to buy it but if she doesn't give it up soon, then I'll be moving on to purchase another donkey. Try that approach first. Then get down and dirty if you must. 

spitforspat people around here have donkey as companion animals for horses, or livestock guardians for sheep, cattle, chickens. Donkeys make excellent guardians and will run off coyotes from herds. Plus they are awesome pets. I have two horses  but really donkeys IMO run circles around horses in terms of intelligence and personality. They make you realize what pea brains horses really are. Plus donkeys are badass and don't have near the spookiness horses have. They give no fucks. 

You are right about everything.

I tried the approach of being in the market for another donkey which we kinda were anyway. I even told her it would be a good transition because my donkey and her donkey get along great. It was so cute the first time they saw each other. Anyway, I've tried a few approaches other than speaking to them directly. Thanks for your understanding.

[Deleted]

Feb 21, 2014 14:50:44 GMT -5 @scottydeux said:

Donkeys are fun pets?

What can be more fun than asking if people want to touch your ass?

[Deleted]

Feb 21, 2014 15:32:43 GMT -5 @otterama said:

Feb 21, 2014 14:50:44 GMT -5 @scottydeux said:

Donkeys are fun pets?

What can be more fun than asking if people want to touch your ass?

And I call him a smart ass because donkeys are intelligent. It's not meant to be a insult, it's just fun to say.

[elleblue]

Not a psychologist but it sounds like your aunt may be depressed - avoiding day to day stuff and other responsibilities because the person just doesn't have the energy to face them. I definitely think you should deal with your uncle instead. That poor donkey. 

[Deleted]

Feb 21, 2014 16:40:28 GMT -5 elleblue said:

Not a psychologist but it sounds like your aunt may be depressed - avoiding day to day stuff and other responsibilities because the person just doesn't have the energy to face them. I definitely think you should deal with your uncle instead. That poor donkey. 

Maybe but she's got a great teaching career that she's happy and thriving with. My cousin is far away at school now but he's been away for a few years now. She's also got a shihzue that she loves and takes good care of. The dog is also an inside pet as well.

[iamali]

I need to for reals know of donkeys produce milk.

Someone must know. TELL ME. This is another topic I think googling could get me in trouble. lol

[Deleted]

Feb 21, 2014 17:31:00 GMT -5 iamali said:

I need to for reals know of donkeys produce milk.

Someone must know. TELL ME. This is another topic I think googling could get me in trouble. lol

The females do of course for their babies. I don't think people drink it but they do produce milk.

[Jermys]

Jesus, I love donkeys. If I could have animals in my (enormous) back yard, I would have a donkey and a goat who were best friends. And a few chickens. I absolutely don't want to live in the country, but I really miss having livestock.