Who is thinking about adoption?

[persa]

Where/how did you research your options and educate yourself? What are the first steps?

Just thinking out loud. We're doing IVF #2 but the RE pretty much has little hope of it working with my age and DOR (all my numbers suck).

[persa]

I'm a dummy and there's a pretty good thread on married life from earlier today already, if anyone is interested.

[G22]

We are. We decided a month or so ago we would like to pursue it. Mostly we have just done online research. Just gathering info on how the process works, questions to ask an agency, finding an agency, etc.

Right around the time we decided to move forward with looking into it, my H's work had a cluster of crap go down and he was so busy it got put on the back burner for the last few weeks. But we still want to eventually.

[rachelgreen]

We are/have been. If this IVF doesn't work, we'll take some time off to recoup and then start pursuing it. I was ready to move to adoption two years ago but DH wasn't there yet. He wanted one last biological attempt. I looked into WI's laws (which their process sucks for the record) so I knew what to be prepared for. We do not want to do foster to adopt so we will have to go the private route.

[redwino]

We are. Some days I'm very excited about adoption and other days its the last thing I want to do.

I've done some internet reading and just got a book from the public library. I am open to a child 2 or younger but don't want to go through the process of foster to adopt so we're probably really looking at domestic infant adoption.

[pamela]

We are in the process now. I was most comfortable dealing with a local agency with a long history and not dealing with internet or self marketing, so we went with one of the only places here, catholic charities. We're finishing up our paperwork for the home study portion.

[hippygirl]

Sometimes I think we should skip IVF (due to my age & egg quality) and go straight for adoption.

Other times I just want to throw in the towel on all of this............

[Bumblebee]

We've talked about it, but we wouldn't pursue it unless we were done trying for a biological child.  If we do adopt, it will probably be a domestic infant adoption.

[MrsAggie]

We haven't talked about it in depth but H has said he is open to it if that's the only way we can have kids. I'm definitely open to it if I can't conceive.

When we first realized this wouldn't be a simple journey for us, I cried to my husband and told him that I *have* to be a mother. One way or another. I don't feel like I would have any kind of fulfillment in life without a child or children.

[discogranny]

We are...sort of. We're kind of in a state of non-action right now. I've been reading about adoption, we talk about it sporadically and we are slowly moving that way. We're thinking it will likely be a domestic, agency, semi-open adoption of a child of our race. This will be the longest path but will also be the easiest for H and his family to process.

I think more than anything right now I find myself feeling a sense of mourning that it is very likely that I will never be pregnant again, accepting that fertility treatment did not work for me and that we will not have biological children. After so many years of working toward the bio child, it's been weird to feel myself transitioning. I'm still not 100% sure I'm okay with it all.

[Deleted]

We are in a similar place to discogranny. I'm not sure if we will adopt or not. I'm past the I will never be pregnant mourning and MH (he has azoospermia) is looking like he is also turning a corner. It took well over a year from initial dx for the sting to start to subside. MH is on a few message boards on adoption. I really haven't dug into research much. If we do adopt, we need to decide sometime in the next year or two, I'm 33 and MH will be 34 in a few months.

[persa]

Mar 23, 2014 20:28:06 GMT -5 hippygirl said:

Sometimes I think we should skip IVF (due to my age & egg quality) and go straight for adoption.

Other times I just want to throw in the towel on all of this............

This is where I am but I've already done one IVF and we're in the midst of a second that is unlikely to be successful due to my age and labs (DOR).