*sigh* Oh MIL

[Odonata]

She always means well, but if you've ever watched everybody loves raymond...she's Marie.  

I guess to best summarize MIL, I would say everything must involve her, be her way, and be about her.  I could write books about it.

So I had my NT scan today (baby was moving all over the place, but never hit the right position so they just had to go off blood work).
I have the first u/s photo that looks like a human and not a gnocchi.  I sent it out to the grandparents via text.

This is MIL's first grandkid so she gets excited.  She goes "Oh, how beautiful!  Do we know the sex?"  I said no, probably not until June 4th when I have my anatomy scan scheduled.

She replies "OK, so now I have to decided on whether or not I want to know.  I think I want it to be a surprise."

Umm....well, WE want to know, we've made that clear from the start.  We intend to tell anyone who asks what it is.  That's going to be a really hard secret to keep.  I mean, once I know I'll be referring to it as he/she, you know?  And they live down the road (almost as close as Marie...) and so it's not like we wont be around them all  the time.  And I have no intention to walk on eggshells to keep it a secret from her, either.  

I go "well, we want to know and will be telling those who ask, so it may be a hard secret to keep very long" and she replied "K".  Also, MIL is exactly the person who would get pissed at US if we "slipped" and said something like "Oh, he/she is kicking me!" because she wants it to be a secret for her.  And what if I have a shower?  Obviously the sex will be known then.  

Of course you can't tell tone via text, but I have a feeling, knowing her, she's mad I'm not all about keeping it a secret from her so she can be surprised.  lol, I guess I'm ruining this for her.  

[Odonata]

Apr 7, 2014 17:01:39 GMT -5 jjwritergirl said:

How could you be so selfish in the face of this being her first grandchild? The nerve you have

I know you're being sarcastic, but it depresses me to realize this is actually what is going through her head. lol.  

[Odonata]

Apr 7, 2014 17:18:20 GMT -5 bricco said:

Posts like this make me want to go kiss my MIL.

Hear enough of my MIL stories and you'll want to move in with her and have her babies.

[bluelikejazz]

So what you're telling me is she is going to avoid you from anatomy scan until birth  this doesn't sound like a bad deal after all!

[Odonata]

Apr 7, 2014 17:40:44 GMT -5 bluelikejazz said:

So what you're telling me is she is going to avoid you from anatomy scan until birth  this doesn't sound like a bad deal after all!

O

M

G

How did I not pick up on this?

No no no no no I know it's not that easy. She won't avoid me because she will be expecting me to work on making it a secret! I mean I can't expect her to do all that work!

[MrsDarcy]

Ha! I feel ya on the MIL front. They can be tricky.

[papie]

My mom tried so hard to convince me not to find out with my first. She kept saying how I was ruining everything and how not knowing the gender was what gives you the energy to go through later. Listen woman, I hate surprises. Thankfully she gave up for the subsequent pregnancies.

[catsarecute]

My FIL said something about not wanting to know the sex. Ummmm okay. Good luck with that.

Just ignore her "wishes" and move on. She doesn't get a say in the matter on this one.

[hokiegirl82]

I'm sorry to hear your MIL is being ridiculous.

I also really don't get people other than the mother-to-be and father-to-be who think they get any say in what goes on with the baby. Really, god bless all of you who have to put up with ridiculous family members and friends who make ridiculous requests or say ridiculous things regarding the baby - you are stronger than I am.

[IndiaInk]

My mom tried to pull this one with me. She loves surprises and told us that if we found out the sex, she didn't want to know. I was like, "yeahhhh good luck with that, because I'm pretty sure you'd hear about it from everyone." We decided to be team green so it wasn't an issue, but it was definitely eye-roll-worthy.

[chickadee77]

Lol - I'm with @charky - I'd probably go out of my way to tell her. At the very least, I'd make sure to tell her face-to-face, "Good luck with that, MIL, because we'll be finding out in a few weeks and don't plan to keep it a secret!" (said brightly, of course).

I guess, if you wanted to play along a little, you could do a mini-gender-reveal for her so that she feels like it's a special event and not just another piece of information. But I would lean away from catering to her (my MIL is a bit like this, so I feel you) to try and nip it in the bud.