Older kid prob. Football.

[cjeanette]

C had been asking for years to play and his pediatrician suggested we wait until about 9 or 10. He is now 9 and wants to play on the 4th team in the fall.

I am having a hard time with this as it is. Today I realized he will be to old for flag so tackle is our only option. Tell me not to freak out.

I mean...he took a cleat to the face defending the goal in soccer on Sat and came okay.....

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[badgergrl]

I am with you. My kids are little but due to CTE we will not be permitting tackle football at our house.

[scribellesam]

Ugh I dread the day DS decides he wants to play football.

Maybe he'll be terrible and hate it? Is that a super mean thing to wish for?

[Deleted]

I will tell DS he can't play football. No exceptions. I don't care if he tells me he hates me and will never speak to me again. He is not allowed to play, it is too dangerous.

[cjeanette]

Apr 9, 2014 22:00:15 GMT -5 scribellesam said:

Ugh I dread the day DS decides he wants to play football.

Maybe he'll be terrible and hate it? Is that a super mean thing to wish for?

Consider they have to have so many practice hours logged in July to participate in the real practices in August I know I will hate it. They also list what you are charged for and what can return if you quit. Never seem a sport do that before.

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[cjeanette]

Apr 9, 2014 22:15:05 GMT -5 @supergreen said:

I will tell DS he can't play football. No exceptions. I don't care if he tells me he hates me and will never speak to me again. He is not allowed to play, it is too dangerous.

What part of tell me not to freak out was confusing to you?

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[Deleted]

Dh coaches so ds may play. Gbcn is not able to support this so it's a hard one to talk here. I would just push safe technique and well fitted equipment. If it's like hockey it can be safer to learn to hit when they're relatively small and slow.

[scribellesam]

Apr 9, 2014 22:16:07 GMT -5 cjeanette said:

Apr 9, 2014 22:00:15 GMT -5 scribellesam said:

Ugh I dread the day DS decides he wants to play football.

Maybe he'll be terrible and hate it? Is that a super mean thing to wish for?

Consider they have to have so many practice hours logged in July to participate in the real practices in August I know I will hate it. They also list what you are charged for and what can return if you quit. Never seem a sport do that before.

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Extra annoying! My cousin recently tried out tackle football. He's enormous and the coaches were all super psyched; but after all the summer practices he decided it wasn't the sport for him and switched to volleyball. So maybe there's hope; letting him play now doesn't mean you're in for 8+ more years of it.

[havarti]

Ugh. I'm reeeeally hoping ds finds a different sport (golf? rowing?). DH's mom made him wait until high school, so hopefully I'll have more time on my side. Maybe you can convince him to be the kicker?

[Deleted]

My 12 year old nephew plays and has since he was 5. His league(s) are very serious about safety. The only issue I've ever seen on the field was an asthma attack.

[cjeanette]

Apr 9, 2014 22:27:43 GMT -5 havarti said:

Ugh. I'm reeeeally hoping ds finds a different sport (golf? rowing?). DH's mom made him wait until high school, so hopefully I'll have more time on my side. Maybe you can convince him to be the kicker?

His soccer coach feels he would make a great kicker. As goalie he can kick across to the other goal box.

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[dbsk8dance]

I'm an anti footballer. I'm fine with soccer, but football is just too dangerous.

It would be a no in our house.

[beefjerky]

This has been an ongoing debate in the jerky household for a few years now, with me in the firm "NO" camp. It's difficult for me to separate because I know a little too much about CTE and second impact syndrome, etc., etc., etc. I lecture about it and then have to come home and listen to DS beg to play. Here are my thoughts, take them or leave them .

Football (WITH the proper safety precautions) is no more dangerous than many other sports. Girls soccer actually has the highest incidence of concussion due to weak neck muscles/improper heading and all that good stuff. So, if played correctly, the risk is no higher than many other sports.

That being said, for me, these are my rules.

1. We always buy DS his own helmet. Often the equipment they get from school and other leagues are not safety tested and/or are reconditioned without being tested.

2. He plays at the appropriate weight class and never plays "up" or "down."

3. He does not start tackle until grade 5 - at the absolute earliest. There are flag leagues through high school here but the school starts tackle in grade five.

4. I have to be confident the coaches are aware of proper safety protocols and procedures. Yes, I know this makes me a pain in the ass (and I'm admittedly "breezy" about most things) but too damn bad. I feel the same way about coaches who do static stretching with the teams prior to a practice or game. At best, it doesn't do a damn thing to help them prior to the game and at worst, it can increase the risk of injury.

5. One concussion and we reevaluate.

That was really long, yikes!! A glass of wine to all who made it though :drink:- or a martini!

[beefjerky]

Apr 9, 2014 22:57:53 GMT -5 dbsk8dance said:

I'm an anti footballer. I'm fine with soccer, but football is just too dangerous.

It would be a no in our house.

There is a very high prevalence of concussion in soccer due to head to head injuries when attempting to head the ball.

[andthentherewere10]

I'm continuing to pray that my little boy just wants to be in the band...

[irishbride2]

I love football and am a huge fan.

But my son will not play unless there are HUGE safety changes made by then. Pop warner, especially, makes me angry.

I am ok with soccer at the younger ages (where heading is not encouraged) but i have similar concerns about soccer as they get older.

I've seen too many 11 year old boys carted off the field to be ok with it.

[cinco]

This is timely for me, b/c DS (5) has started to ask about playing. He'd still be in the flag football stage, but I know it will lead to tackle eventually. I was a firm "NO" before, but it isn't so easy once your kid starts asking! His friends do it, we know the coaches, etc. and so forth. I think they (DS and our coach friends) are wearing down on DH, but considering I'm the one that has to take him to practices, I'm trying to hold strong. We already have the helmet b/c DS is playing lacrosse, which isn't a gentle sport itself. Also hard on the noggin, soccer. No win with these boys! DD1 does cross country and track and loves it, but DS seems to like the more physical team sports. I feel bad pushing him away from them if that is what he enjoys.

[Velar Fricative]

Apr 9, 2014 23:09:54 GMT -5 beefjerky said:

Apr 9, 2014 22:57:53 GMT -5 dbsk8dance said:

I'm an anti footballer. I'm fine with soccer, but football is just too dangerous.

It would be a no in our house.

There is a very high prevalence of concussion in soccer due to head to head injuries when attempting to head the ball.

Yeah, I am baffled when people who aren't okay with football are okay with soccer at ages when kids can head the ball instead.

We are not an anti-football household. DH played up through college and loved it but we are cognizant of the safety issues. Hell, if it weren't so damn expensive I'd be okay with DD playing hockey.

[gibbinator]

I'm glad this isn't even a possibility where I live. Although I suppose our alternatives are hockey, lacrosse and rugby...
Anyway, most athletics carry their risks as kids age into more competitive teams, whether torn ligaments, broken bones or concussions. So, just emphasize safety as much as you can and cross your fingers I guess.

[Deleted]

Apr 9, 2014 22:17:08 GMT -5 cjeanette said:

Apr 9, 2014 22:15:05 GMT -5 @supergreen said:

I will tell DS he can't play football. No exceptions. I don't care if he tells me he hates me and will never speak to me again. He is not allowed to play, it is too dangerous.

What part of tell me not to freak out was confusing to you?

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I'll run the risk of being flamed by being blunt: if you're freaked out just say no. You don't have to say yes.

[CrazyLucky]

DH and I are in agreement that DS will not play football. When people here ask I just say he has more important things to do with his brain. Plus we're both big soccer fans, so hoping to steer him in that direction.

[savan]

We are lucky that there is a huge flag football movement in our area. The boys play through middle school and it's very popular. DS begged to play and loves it. I think I'd still say no to tackle football but it probably won't come up since all DS's friends play flag.

[cinco]

Apr 10, 2014 8:34:40 GMT -5 savan said:

We are lucky that there is a huge flag football movement in our area. The boys play through middle school and it's very popular. DS begged to play and loves it. I think I'd still say no to tackle football but it probably won't come up since all DS's friends play flag.

Do they still wear the helmets and pads for flag in your league? Just curious. I know they do here. I find it interesting b/c the U9 wear the helmets and the pads in Lacrosse even though there is supposedly no checking, but the girls only wear goggles (no pads, helmets). Rules are the same, so I don't understand the difference.

[pescalita]

My H played from HS into college and gained a ton from the experience. We're aware of the risks and will make sure they are mitigated in every practical way.

When H was playing, his dad told stories about his practice days when you weren't allowed water breaks. By the time our boys play, H's concussion stories will be just as flabbergasting. I actually think it's way safer already compared to 15 years ago.

There's a chance they won't have interest, but we still have the Rose Bowl on the DVR because it's A's favorite thing to watch.

[wonderfezz]

I'm not going to tell him he can't play. Would I rather him be the punter? SURE. haha I'm not going to worry about it until he wants to play in high school.

There's always things you can find to worry about. Right now? I choose not to worry.

eta- Also, my kid will never be big enough to play past little leagues.  So I don't think I'll have to worry about him playing in HS.

[dancingirl21]

Our son will not play. DH is adamant against him playing because of the safety issues. We are tall people, so we really hope he likes men's volleyball instead!

[savan]

Apr 10, 2014 8:39:44 GMT -5 cinco said:

Apr 10, 2014 8:34:40 GMT -5 savan said:

We are lucky that there is a huge flag football movement in our area. The boys play through middle school and it's very popular. DS begged to play and loves it. I think I'd still say no to tackle football but it probably won't come up since all DS's friends play flag.

Do they still wear the helmets and pads for flag in your league? Just curious. I know they do here. I find it interesting b/c the U9 wear the helmets and the pads in Lacrosse even though there is supposedly no checking, but the girls only wear goggles (no pads, helmets). Rules are the same, so I don't understand the difference.

No.  Well I have seen some kids with the soft helmets.  They do wear mouth guards though.  There is no touch allowed outside of flag pulling.  There are a few collisions of course as is the nature of kids running into each other, but they keep their heads up and the risk looks pretty similar to soccer to me.

[Deleted]

Apr 9, 2014 22:21:09 GMT -5 @tokenhoser said:

Dh coaches so ds may play. Gbcn is not able to support this so it's a hard one to talk here. I would just push safe technique and well fitted equipment. If it's like hockey it can be safer to learn to hit when they're relatively small and slow.

I'm here as well. I think that at such a young age, the team experience and the physical activity are good things. Perhaps the OP could attend the first few practices and pull him from the team if you feel uncomfortable with the physicality? 

[cinco]

Apr 10, 2014 8:44:33 GMT -5 savan said:

Apr 10, 2014 8:39:44 GMT -5 cinco said:

Do they still wear the helmets and pads for flag in your league? Just curious. I know they do here. I find it interesting b/c the U9 wear the helmets and the pads in Lacrosse even though there is supposedly no checking, but the girls only wear goggles (no pads, helmets). Rules are the same, so I don't understand the difference.

No.  Well I have seen some kids with the soft helmets.  They do wear mouth guards though.  There is no touch allowed outside of flag pulling.  There are a few collisions of course as is the nature of kids running into each other, but they keep their heads up and the risk looks pretty similar to soccer to me.

Thanks. I'll have to do a little more research, as I suspect ours is not real flag football, but a precursor to tackle. 

[momof2boys]

My DH won't let my boys play football. Between the stats of concussions and he himself played one year and got injured. That said, my kids DO play hockey. So far they are in leagues that can't check etc, though accidents can always happen. My son begged for two years to play hockey and its the love of his life. I get nervous but also realize that its what he loves and everything in life comes with risk. It has also helped him make new friends and gain confidence in himself . Its been amazing for my younger son with a severe anxiety disorder...the only time he's fully happy and "free with himself" out in public is when he's playing a hockey game.

I did convince my DH to let my boys play flag football, he was nervous it would lead to tackle. So far we haven't been able to fit it into our schedule since my kids play hockey year round, and lacrosse and played basketball last season.