Also, the fact that C is a boy is such a tiny portion of his identity. When people ask me what he's like, the first things that come to mind are that he's cuddly, and rambunctious, and talkative, and loves to read and watch Elmo and play with the dog and his play kitchen and eat bananas. The fact that he has a peen and wears a lot of blue clothes is like 4892578392th on the list.
I agree with this and your first post too. When I read all of these descriptions of boys they all sound like DD too!
She is rambunctious, curious, wicked smart, hysterical, so loving and sweet. She just happens to be a girl. But she also likes to work out with her daddy in her yard and wear her "workin boots"
And btw, if it is a boy I will need your clothing advice/stores. C is so freaking adorable and boys clothes can be full of ugly. I was just browsing carters and the number of shirts with the word "hunk" on them is (puke)ing
Boy clothes are fun to shop for, IMO. It's a bit more challenging because you have to weed through the fugly stuff, but the cute stuff, paired correctly, is adorable. It's like a challenge!
Most of C's clothes come from Baby Gap (on super sale, I buy ahead), Target, or consignment sales. I also like Threadless tees and random stuff from Zulily. I do a lot of solids, stripes, and plaids but add add fun red sneakers or Toms or brightly colored pants to make them more fun.
I prefer dressing a toddler boy to a baby boy, because the fashion industry has caught on to the fact that "mommy's new man" stuff is awkward on a 2 year old and it's mostly small versions of what my H wears. And I appreciate not having to deal with glitter, baby bikinis, giant frilly tutus, and leopard print.
babies are babies. You will love the baby no matter the gender.
That being said. Diaper changes on boys WAY better than diaper changes on girls. No crevices for poo to hide.
Exactly, LOL. We babysat our friends' daughter a few weeks ago and I had to change her poopy diaper. I was so out of my element, and it was so much harder than changing DS's!
Otherwise, I agree with others who said there aren't necessarily huge differences. I definitely believe that gender is a social construct, for the most part, so for me the mental preparation for having a boy was more about the biological differences: OK, diaper changes will most likely be easier. Do we circumcise or not? Ew, we'll have to deal with pubescent masturbation. Oh, I won't have to deal with periods!
Just wanted to come in to say that I could have have written your first paragraph word for word before I found out what #2 was. It's a boy! I found out 2 months ago and I'm still adjusting. I am happy and I love him already but I do get sad when I see sisters or baby girl things. But I'm going to have a son and he's going to be awesome!
Also, the fact that C is a boy is such a tiny portion of his identity. When people ask me what he's like, the first things that come to mind are that he's cuddly, and rambunctious, and talkative, and loves to read and watch Elmo and play with the dog and his play kitchen and eat bananas. The fact that he has a peen and wears a lot of blue clothes is like 4892578392th on the list.
Yeah, this.
I had a slight preference to have a girl because I grew up as a very girly girl who took ballet, played Barbies, favorite color was pink, was uncoordinated in sports, hated being dirty, etc. We were team green and finding out he was a boy was just one part of the amazing moment when he was born. It was exciting to see him for the first time, hear him cry for the first time, to decide who he looks like. I was worried I would be disappointed, but it didn't even cross my mind.
I realize DS is young, but nearly 6 months into all of this, there's not one thing I'd be doing differently if he was a she. (Other than cover him with a baby washcloth during diaper changes, cuz kid will PEE!) I'd sing him/her the same silly songs, cheer as he/she figures out how to roll, go for walks in the nice weather, get excited each time he/she tries a new food, etc.
You're scared of the unknown, and I get it, but babies are awesome (you know, when they're not assholes, lol). You'll love him or her, lots!
Well, I have one of each, but I love love love my little boy! He was always so easy going and has a zest for life.....wants to explore everything, but still needs Mom there to reassure him. He turns 4 next week, and he is still this snuggly, sweet, crazy little guy -- I just love him to pieces. Boys are excitement and sweetness all rolled into one.
IDK how true this actually is for most people but isn't it a thing that boys are thought to be harder on you when young but easier as teens? Less moody, bitchy, sullen etc.? Less into the high school relational drama? I was a really hard teen girl on my parents so I hope my boys take it easier in me.
Post by leonard131 on Apr 17, 2014 11:08:53 GMT -5
No sparkly shoes :-) Just kidding.
I was the opposite and really didn't want a girl. I think it is ok to have one perference over the other but in the end you know you will love your child no matter what.
I will say I like little boy clothes and just adore them in red sneakers with white toes. Yes I know little girls wear them too but I just love them on boys.
An anecdote - My brother is SUPER close with our mom. And my brother and I are really good friends, too. I had times growing up when I wanted a sister, but hey, I didn't have to have the obligatory sister-as-my-maid-of-honor issue.
I too had gender disappointment when I found out we were having a boy. But honestly, he's pretty awesome! He's really into books and music and just loves pushing little cars around. But he also loves playing with kitchen stuff, playing doctor with his Elmo, etc. It's really quite a lot of fun to a be a boy mom!
Also, the fact that C is a boy is such a tiny portion of his identity. When people ask me what he's like, the first things that come to mind are that he's cuddly, and rambunctious, and talkative, and loves to read and watch Elmo and play with the dog and his play kitchen and eat bananas. The fact that he has a peen and wears a lot of blue clothes is like 4892578392th on the list.
I agree with this and your first post too. When I read all of these descriptions of boys they all sound like DD too!
She is rambunctious, curious, wicked smart, hysterical, so loving and sweet. She just happens to be a girl. But she also likes to work out with her daddy in her yard and wear her "workin boots"
And btw, if it is a boy I will need your clothing advice/stores. C is so freaking adorable and boys clothes can be full of ugly. I was just browsing carters and the number of shirts with the word "hunk" on them is (puke)ing
A lot of DS' stuff is from ON and is totally blank. No words or phrases. You can get a lot online! Target has a lot of good/cute stuff now that has dinosaurs and jets and DINOSAURS. We're working on "RAWWWWWWWWWWWR" when he wears his t-rex t-shirt.
DS really lovvvvvvvvvves his dada too. When he co-sleeps with us, he takes over DH's side and snuggles with him/sleeps on DH's pillow. They play 'xbos' (xBox) together - we gave DS a controller with no batteries in it. DS loves it. He's really tough and very independent.
I was also Team Girl before the U/S but now that I have DS, he is SO amazing and such a good/easy kid. right now when he wears his T-Rex tshirt.
Post by mainelyfoolish on Apr 17, 2014 11:38:53 GMT -5
Like so many others, I had a girl and was hoping/expecting for my second to also be a girl. I was honestly surprised when we found out it was a boy (through genetic testing, so there was no mistake). It took me a little while to warm up to the idea. After he was born, I was like, "Why did I ever think this would be so different?" Babies' needs are all pretty similar, boy or girl. And everything you learned from the first kid won't apply to the second kid, regardless of sex!
Would you ever consider staying Team Green? I think it is almost impossible to be too disappointed when you have that cute smushface staring up at you vs having 20 weeks to stew about it.
I thought for sure I was going to have another girl but was surprised with a boy. I'm only 4 months in so it hasn't been much different yet but I am looking forward to (hopefully) raising a good man who's a bit of a feminist and putting one less douchebag on the streets.
I'll ditto Brie that DS's identity isn't tied up in being a boy. That being said, I am SO glad I don't have to deal with princesses and teenage girl drama because I just was not that girl.
Post by rootbeerfloat on Apr 17, 2014 12:47:29 GMT -5
Ditto everyone who said that sex is a very small part of their identity. In some ways, DD has more stereotypical boy qualities (e.g., messy, rambunctious, loud, fearless, etc.) than DS does, though he loves his dinosaurs, superheroes, sci-fi things, too... but so do I! He may be H's mini-me physically, but he has more of my personality, which can be helpful as I "get" him. He's also super attached to me and still generally content to let me pick out his clothes, lol.
Would you ever consider staying Team Green? I think it is almost impossible to be too disappointed when you have that cute smushface staring up at you vs having 20 weeks to stew about it.
I thought for sure I was going to have another girl but was surprised with a boy. I'm only 4 months in so it hasn't been much different yet but I am looking forward to (hopefully) raising a good man who's a bit of a feminist and putting one less douchebag on the streets.
I love the idea of being team green, but in reality I'm not that strong
Also, the fact that C is a boy is such a tiny portion of his identity. When people ask me what he's like, the first things that come to mind are that he's cuddly, and rambunctious, and talkative, and loves to read and watch Elmo and play with the dog and his play kitchen and eat bananas. The fact that he has a peen and wears a lot of blue clothes is like 4892578392th on the list.
Post by imojoebunny on Apr 17, 2014 15:19:32 GMT -5
I so wanted another girl, which was funny because when I had a girl, I wanted a boy. I learned that DS was a boy the same time I learned he had a 1 in 3 chance of having DS or a major birth defect.... So I was in tears all the way around. He turned out to be the 2 in 3, and for that I am forever grateful. He is a mess sometimes, and gets into way more than his sister, yesterday, I left him alone for 20 minutes to make a call, and he filled up 20 glasses with water and spilled them all around the house, but he is also a cuddly mama boy at 5, and has totally different skills than his sister. I am a fan.
Post by noodleskooze on Apr 17, 2014 17:41:39 GMT -5
I love having a son (though I am sure I'd love a girl just as much)! I really think his sex has very little to do with it, so don't be worried! He's fun, goofy, nosy, etc. and we have so much fun with him.
babies are babies. You will love the baby no matter the gender.
That being said. Diaper changes on boys WAY better than diaper changes on girls. No crevices for poo to hide.
But what about the wrinkly testicles and pee in your face?
They aren't that wrinkly in the beginning. I mean not enough for poo to get stuck in the wrinkles. And the pee rarely gets in your face, more like theirs. Still beats cleaning poop out of girl private parts.
Post by cricketwife on Apr 17, 2014 19:16:59 GMT -5
zarapipe, I posted a similar question after we found out we were having a boy. DH and I both had a strong preference for a girl. I haven't read all the replies here; I imagine many of them are similar. But I wanted to repost what h wrote that day because it was beautiful and so true.
I have three boys. My oldest is so intellectually curious, imaginative, and funny. He and I love the same books and movies, and curling up under a big blanket for a movie night with him is about my favorite thing ever. He is not quite six, and I already find him to be more interesting than most of the adults in my life.
DS2 is so incredibly kind and sensitive that it melts my heart. He was born with this innate sense of compassion and concern for other people. I can't wait to see what he does with his life. And his laugh is hands down the best sound ever.
DS3 is only 4 months old, so his personality is not as well developed. But he is darling and smiley and utterly delightful thus far, and I am so glad we have him.
The bottom line is that all boys are different, just like all girls are different. The fact that your baby is a boy says relatively little about him or about all the ways he will enrich your life--it just happens to be one of the only things you know about him at this point, so it feels all-defining. He may be witty or smart or kind or adventurous or a million other things, and getting to know him will be one of the best things you ever do. It will be awesome.
I always envisioned myself with girls, but I am so grateful to have wound up with the kids I have. So, yes, boys are awesome.
As you are already a parent, you probably know what she wrote to be true. As somebody who cried when I found out we were having a boy, I can tell you now that I love him more than I ever knew possible and that I'm utterly delighted that he's a boy. And of course this surprises no one. It will be the same for you, girl or boy
Post by teatimefor2 on Apr 17, 2014 19:21:05 GMT -5
He's yours. It's a simple as that, but my son is awesome. He's super sweet, loves to read, swing and play in the sandbox. He wants to sit in my lap when we read and melts my heart when he lights up when my DH walks through the front door.
I get it, I've always pictured myself with a daughter, but my son just suits our family. He's the perfect combination on DH and I- he's the baby we were meant to have.
cricketwife -- I am so touched that what I wrote before was helpful to you! Thanks for reposting.
I have said my piece on this, so I will refrain from writing another novel about how amazing my boys are. But really, having a son is amazing, and mostly for the same reasons having a daughter is (I assume ) amazing--you get to watch them grow, see their personalities develop, explore the world with them, laugh with (and sometimes at) them, love them, and do all the things parents do. Most of the generalizations about boys are just that. They may or may not be messier/wilder/snugglier/less moody/more independent/etc. than their female counterparts. It just depends on the kid. Except for the part where they are obsessed with their penises. That seems to be true of pretty much all boys.
Post by littlemisschatty on Apr 18, 2014 6:11:00 GMT -5
I think boy clothes are cuter - more classic I guess. Not overly trendy or tacky
There is nothing sweeter than a little boy who wants to cuddle
Boys don't WHINE (even at 8 mos old his girl friends are whinyyyy omg). He is just chill and happy all the time
I think boy diapers are easier. All the parts are on the outside. Don't have to worry about UTIs
I love to imagine that this little tiny boy will one day be bigger than me. He is gonna be such a handsome man. I just picture hugging this big strapping guy one day. I dunno why, but I think of that all the time.
I will add that I have a certain comfort level around boys - I have a little brother, all my neighborhood friends were boys, and during my babysitting years I looked after boys (just how it worked out, it wasn't something I sought out). Hell, in college I lived in a frat house for a summer. I think it's natural to gravitate towards what you know instead of what you don't. I have experience with avoiding focused streams of pee and have no clue how to braid hair.
Based on our u/s, our little boy is going to be the spitting image of his father. Their profiles are exactly the same. It's really cool knowing that I'll get to see an approximation of my H as a child, right in front of my eyes instead of just in yellowed 80s photos.
You can get peed on from multiple angles and have to shout, "Don't forget to tuck your penis (we call it something different)," when they poop.
I love my son so much, he is the light of my life and the idea of another child, boy or girl, is overwhelming to me because how could I love two people this way, this much?
My son does like to bring his penis into conversation awkwardly. When asked what baseball team he liked the best yesterday he replied that he liked the Red Sox the best but his penis likes the Rays.
I'm such a girly girl and would have loved to have a daughter to share that with but I couldn't be happier with my boys. It's nice being the only princess in the house