Breezy with a side of distraught that I'm too breezy
So me. If I spent half as much time avoiding my probably judgement worthy behavior as I did worrying that I should care, my life would probably be a lot easier.
Working mom who sends her kid to daycare on her days off BF till 1 year Turned FF at about 22 months Haven't used a carrier in at least a year Pro-vax, but DH and I don't get flu shots BLW and purees at the same time CD Drives a 10 year old saturn Could not care less about clothes as long as they are clean Opposite of a germaphobe Lets DS eat oatmeal at every meal Screen time is limited to a few youtube songs per week No CIO, he STTN at about a year on his own
Wildly pro-vaccine yup Drives a sensible sedan (or minivan) yup, minivan and only 1 kid right here BFs until ~18mos Only made it to 8 months RF until 3 (probably in a Chicco Nextfit) RF until at least 2, we have 2 Nextfits Did BLW I don't even know what I'm doing...I give her purees and little pieces of things, but I'm pretty relaxed about what she can have as long as the bites are small enough. I'm a little annoyed my pedi said no peanut butter until age 1. Used Total Baby or Baby Connect yup Owns at least 3 carriers (with passionate opinions on each) Only 2, k'tan from when she was smaller, and Ergo that I use now Does NOT like graphic tees or character gear Don't care about this. I buy what I think is cute, dress her in what other people got her if I like it, the rest are backup clothes. But sleepers all day everyday are okay up to a year I follow the same rules for her as I do for me. PJs all day are fine at home, but I get her dressed if I go out. That being said, I could care less if some other baby lives in sleepers. Feeds their kid well-balanced, protein-rich dinners Not there yet. I just give her scraps of food, but mostly she still has bottles for all meals. Does NOT appreciate you commenting on their baby's size Don't care, but could see why others would. Just haven't really experienced this. Probably lives in Seattle or NY NY, but not the city Owns cloth diapers, but probably doesn't use them any more nope Has terrible inlaws Not terrible Sleep trains at precisely 6 months, no sooner or later Ferber at 4.5 months Uses sunblock, but never the chemical kind I have Babyganics, but haven't done a ton of research on this Approves of pouches into adulthood (but organic is clearly preferred) Just starting pouches, but I plan to love them if it allows her to feed herself. Booze Yes Please!!!
I'm also breezy about leaving DD overnight. We've left her with my parents 6 times in 8.5 months, and I'm fine with it.
I BF until 10 months but started supplementing at 4 months Started purees at 5 months Made homemade purees RF past a year, most likely will go at least 2 years (in a Chicco Nextfit ) Use an amber teething necklace but also use motrin Still give bottles at 14 months Rock DD to sleep No sleep training No concerned about screen Very PRO vaccines Work PT overnights (one-two nights a week), mostly SAH and no daycare Would babywear if my baby was into it. Have a moby and ergo, DD dislikes both. Considering a ring sling. Drive a small SUV Use Baby Connect Disposable diapers Loves consignment/swap clothes Doesn't care about baby size comments. Though I think I may mind more if she was bigger and people commented since DH and I are both overweight... Put DD is speech therapy for eating aversions Pro circ if we ever have a boy
My IRL friends and family think I am crunchy but here I don't think I am crunchy at all.
Post by wanderlustmom on Apr 22, 2014 16:23:50 GMT -5
These always crack me up, I wonder how self aware we are? I am including myself--most people are actually not good at describing themselves.
I do like a lot of me time, limited television, didn't BF at all but tried (breast reduction years ago), work, small SUV (DH doesn't like minivans, I like them), I let both of my kids be belly sleepers at eight weeks (have gotten judged for this), some organic food, some non organic, DH and both have yelled at the kids--work in progress. I rear faced until 2, did not cloth diaper and didn't make my own baby food. My kids needed early bedtimes as babies and toddlers. I read parenting research incessantly but try to take it with a grain of salt. DH is a bit of a tiger dad and has the kids do a lot of learning enrichment--they appear to like it. I am not a breezy person but I am always working on being more relaxed as a parent. Each year gets easier and I see when I back away, the kids do better. The thing I am most proud of is that so far my kids are kind and use manners. I agree so much of what they do is out of our control. I am just trying to give them a happy childhood.
One who creates or encounters just enough stress or challenges as to barely be surviving...yet still has a quite a large lazy streak. I'm an urban, conservative who is into the arts big time. I spent 10yrs getting my profession only to immediately give it up to SAH & have lots of babies. I live a life of contradictions. Over the years my parenting is very I consistent as well.
Pro-vax and pro-dirt because DS is exposed to so much shit. Literally. Rabbit, chicken, cow, cat, and dog everyday.
I guess I'm a "1950s little boy's mom." I SAH, tend to our farm, make elaborate meals that are ready when DH gets home. DS plays in dirt, smacks stuff with sticks, throws rocks.
Post by teatimefor2 on Apr 22, 2014 20:06:28 GMT -5
hmmmm... based on that list:
Wildly pro-vaccine: I am pro vaccine, but not wildly. Drives a sensible sedan (or minivan): Minivan BFs until ~18mos: BF until 18 months RF until 3 (probably in a Chicco Nextfit): Just got the Foofn and love it! Did BLW: Yes Used Total Baby or Baby Connect: Guilty, loved Total Baby Owns at least 3 carriers (with passionate opinions on each): Not me at all Does NOT like graphic tees or character gear: True But sleepers all day everyday are okay up to a year: No Feeds their kid well-balanced, protein-rich dinners: Yes, we strive to eat clean Does NOT appreciate you commenting on their baby's size: I don't care, someone has to be the biggest, someone has to be the smallest. Probably lives in Seattle or NY: Now the tri state area.
Honestly, and this might be flameful, but I figure we have the love, intellect, desire, and resources to ensure that our child and future children will turn out okay. I fully believe in moderation. My son does watch Sesame Street, but we read for at least an hour a day, he gets active play and lots and lots of love. Some days are about DS and other days are about the family and that's okay. It's all about balance. Maybe DH and I are just too confident, but I'm not worried about the little stuff. I worry about the big stuff; what age to start kindergarten as DS is within a month of the cut-off, how to balance needs verse wants (especially as he ages),and issues with privacy (social medial, FB, etc).
But in the end, I am sure it will all work out. LOL!
WRT the MMM list: I have no idea what Total Baby or Baby Connect even are, I do not live in Seattle or NYC, I own zero cloth diapers aside from swim dipes or burp rags, I don't sleep train at all, my ILs are really lovely, and my kids don't always eat perfectly balanced dinners. Other than that, I pretty much fit the MMM mold. I nursed my older kids for ~2 years each (the 1 yo is still nursing), own several carriers, did BLW, RF until 2.5-3, vaccinate, and have WOH for most of my kids' lives (I WAH now).
Honestly, as crazy as it sounds, tolerance for messy play is often one of the quickest ways for me to figure out if I will click with someone as a parent. I guess maybe I am a play doh anytime kind of mom?
Average MMM: Wildly pro-vaccine - YES Drives a sensible sedan (or minivan) - nope BFs until ~18mos- unlikely RF until 3 (probably in a Chicco Nextfit) - maybe. We do have a Nextfit Did BLW - scared to death of choking, so no Used Total Baby or Baby Connect - for about 5 days Owns at least 3 carriers (with passionate opinions on each) - lol. I'm really not that coordinated. I like the Becco though. Does NOT like graphic tees or character gear - YES But sleepers all day everyday are okay up to a year - to each their own. I still dress E up most days we leave the house Feeds their kid well-balanced, protein-rich dinners - not yet Does NOT appreciate you commenting on their baby's size - steady 50% so DNA Probably lives in Seattle or NY lol - nope
I do think being breezy is partially your choice / personality and partially luck.
Example it is likely easier to be breezy leaving your kid overnight if you have trusted family to watch them. Or if your kid does not have special needs.
Or easier to be breezy about screen time if your kid doesn't act out after watching tv.
This is how I feel. I fully expected to be very breezy. I am laid back/type B to the point where I constantly have to prove to people that I care. We were confident older parents with established lives. Having a high maintenance baby fucked me up in ways I wouldn't imagine.
Overanalyzing/researching working mom. Breastfeed, baby wear,cosleep and bed share, extended rear facing, pro VAX, particular about what I feed my kid, drive a minivan and hate graphic tees. I wish I could be breezy. Even when I try to be breezy I fail miserably though. Its just not me.
That probably explains why I am currently losing my mind because 3 kids under two does not lend itself well to my personality. I have to let it go!
I do think being breezy is partially your choice / personality and partially luck.
Example it is likely easier to be breezy leaving your kid overnight if you have trusted family to watch them. Or if your kid does not have special needs.
Or easier to be breezy about screen time if your kid doesn't act out after watching tv.
So true. And it probably has a lot to do with how you were raised as well. Take screen time for example. I know a few moms who only let their kids watch tv/play video games for one hour on the weekends. That seems really extreme and unnecessarily strict to me but I grew up with pretty much unlimited screen time. I don't go that far but I figure, my brother and I turned out all right, so I don't see a problem with my kids having an hour a day.
I do think being breezy is partially your choice / personality and partially luck.
Example it is likely easier to be breezy leaving your kid overnight if you have trusted family to watch them. Or if your kid does not have special needs.
Or easier to be breezy about screen time if your kid doesn't act out after watching tv.
This is 100% true. I'd say my personality isn't particularly breezy, but I get worn out from worrying about all the things, all the time, so some things I let go. But luck plays into it so much. I am comfortable leaving dd with my parents, but if I didn't have them, I would be in an entirely different place.
Post by partiallysunny on Apr 23, 2014 9:48:52 GMT -5
Average MMM: Wildly pro-vaccine yes Drives a sensible sedan (or minivan) no, small hatchback BFs until ~18mos 6 months RF until 3 (probably in a Chicco Nextfit) RF until 2 Did BLW BLW? Used Total Baby or Baby Connect what? Owns at least 3 carriers (with passionate opinions on each) two... Does NOT like graphic tees or character gear up to a point But sleepers all day everyday are okay up to a year I'm okay with that Feeds their kid well-balanced, protein-rich dinners ahahahahahaha Does NOT appreciate you commenting on their baby's size who does? Probably lives in Seattle or NY lol no
Very breezy. I do not research issues. I use my instincts and my understanding of my baby to make decisions. The only thing I insist upon is respect and behavior outside the house. I think we are all up in each others mommy business way too much. There are many decision I have made that friends disagreed with. But, I don't think it is as important to call your "butt" a rear end as it is to listen to an adult and follow directions.
Post by browneyedgirl9 on Apr 23, 2014 11:57:41 GMT -5
Working Mom In Home (licensed) daycare pro-vaccine I drive a small sedan. Husband has a SUV BF but also supplementing with formula (BF at home/ formula at daycare) Plan to rear face until 2, only have my infant seat so far, so no nexfit yet. Plan to make purees and start cereal around 5 months. Nope to the Total Baby or Baby Connect Own a ring sling/ Boba/ structured carrier. But dont use them too often. Fine with graphic tees. Buy most of DS clothing at consignment. I am not into sleepers, I love dressing DS up for the day. I plan to try and keep meals healthy. But we also eat processed foods here and there, as well as take out/ fast food at times. I dont really care if people comment on DS size. I get the "how old is he? he is big!" comment which makes me laugh beacsue he is in 10% for height and weight and is a peanut. Live in Mass
Breezy. I usually go with the decision that makes my life easier or that I have a gut feeling about. I do sometimes wonder if I should researching more or worrying about certain things. But often those things do not occur to me until someone else mentions it.
I am a working mom, who tried bf but ended up combo feeding and pumping for 4 months, drive a small SUV, own two carriers but love my stroller, and really feed my kid what is easiest - sometimes a pouch/puree, sometimes what we're eating.
So me. If I spent half as much time avoiding my probably judgement worthy behavior as I did worrying that I should care, my life would probably be a lot easier.
I just ask myself 'would bnchanums do this?' and then I feel good about my choice. Yesterday after she posted H weight and size and diet, I was reassured about my L.
You give me way too credit, but it made me smile anyway
H calls me a yippy (yuppy hippy). I'm just being Miley, guys.
Wildly pro-vaccine: Pro, but we spaced.
Drives a sensible sedan (or minivan): Um. No. I drive a gas guzzling Mercedes and live in a city where cars aren't necessary. Like, at all.
BFs until ~18mos: Still nursing at 21 months.
RF until 3 (probably in a Chicco Nextfit): Yes, but in a Fooooooonf (though my parents have a Nextfit).
Did BLW: Yes, because it was easiest for me.
Used Total Baby or Baby Connect: I missed this memo. I don't even know what these are.
Owns at least 3 carriers (with passionate opinions on each): Yes, minus the passion. I buy/wear what's comfy/works for me. When it stops working, I try something new. And I own a lot of strollers.
Does NOT like graphic tees or character gear: I don't like character gear, but I'm not anti graphic t.
But sleepers all day everyday are okay up to a year: I don't give any fucks about this.
Feeds their kid well-balanced, protein-rich dinners: I'm somewhere between McDonalds and Jean-George.
Does NOT appreciate you commenting on their baby's size: I don't get my panties in a bunch about this.
Probably lives in Seattle or NY: Ding, ding, ding.
I research the shit out of everything, then I do about 3/4 of what I intended and never stress over certain stuff in moderation. I just like a general 'baby rearing plan' in my mind on ALL topics. I
Wildly pro-vaccine: Wildly. And I'm annoyed my ped's office spaced without letting me know. But I am not really freaked by it.
Drives a sensible sedan (or minivan): Subaru Forester
BFs until ~18mos: Kid self-weaned at 8.5 months. Tried to get him back on for 6 weeks with no success. EPing since then. He's had 3 oz of formula to supplement shortfalls so far. We've decided to take a risk and keep saving for college anyways. I'll keep pumping for at least one month, and may keep going a little longer just at home. We'll see.
RF until 3 (probably in a Chicco Nextfit): That's the plan, but in the Foonf (cause I of COURSE need the most overpriced baby shit out there).
Did BLW: A little, but lots of (organic) pouches too.
Used Total Baby or Baby Connect: This the app? I did for a few weeks.
Owns at least 3 carriers (with passionate opinions on each): Two. Beco gemini and the katan. They both were pretty cool.
Does NOT like graphic tees or character gear: I don't like character gear, but I'm not anti graphic tees.
But sleepers all day everyday are okay up to a year: Didn't do it, but don't care.
Feeds their kid well-balanced, protein-rich dinners: Ummmm.....I've spent a significant amount of time researching older baby/toddler health, and have concluded that I should be more focused on healthy fat rich stuff over protein rich stuff. I think this answer makes me as un-breezy as they come. But at the same time, I do not stress if my kid eats crap occasionally.
Does NOT appreciate you commenting on their baby's size: Don't mind at all.
Probably lives in Seattle or NY: Other side of the Hudson but close enough....
Post by redheadbaker on Apr 24, 2014 8:48:10 GMT -5
Wildly pro-vaccine: yup Drives a sensible sedan (or minivan): yup BFs until ~18mos: yup RF until 3 (probably in a Chicco Nextfit): TBD. DS is almost 2.5, rear facing in a NextFit Did BLW: nope Used Total Baby or Baby Connect: nope. But S.O. did keep a paper log. Owns at least 3 carriers (with passionate opinions on each): Nope. I have 4, lol Does NOT like graphic tees or character gear: I do like graphic and character tees. But sleepers all day everyday are okay up to a year: we didn't but I don't judge. Feeds their kid well-balanced, protein-rich dinners: I serve them. He doesn't eat them. Does NOT appreciate you commenting on their baby's size: Yeah. I was very defensive about how tiny he was. Probably lives in Seattle or NY lol: nope. But on the same coast as NY.