Post by shekels1222 on May 11, 2014 17:03:07 GMT -5
My DS is 2.5 yrs old and I have never left him for more than 2 nights. And the first time I did that was 6 months ago. My SIL and BIL went on a week vacation when their kid was 5 months old though.
I am not comfortable leaving my kid for more than a couple nights, but that is MY comfort level. You wil have to determine your comfort level when the time comes. And how much you trust the caretakers.
My parents are amazing with my son but could no way keep him for more than a few days at a time.
It'd be one thing if it was you planning your own trip 2-3 months out and felt ok to leave your kid with whom you felt best. It's totally different when you'd have to commit before the kid is even born.
Also I've seen too many people try to rely on their parents or their ILs and it just ends up being just a bad situation. You really don't wanna be searching for a week-long babysitter if you don't end up being comfortable with your ILs.
Post by irishbride2 on May 12, 2014 4:50:34 GMT -5
Some people do, and that is fine. I personally am not comfortable leaving a child that young for a week, especially to go on a cruise where it would be hard to get back if needed.
DD was 2 when I first was away for a week, and it was for grad school. Again, some do it earlier (I've been away from both kids for a weekend several times) but for a week I personally want them to be older.
My instinct would be to take baby with us and make a family vacation out of it. I mean the cruise is 7 nights long and the wedding is one day.
We don't have kids yet, so I am somewhat hesitant to answer the part about leaving baby. But I will say that the proposed situation (grandparents watching baby for a week) would have been very normal in both my family of origin and DH's, so the idea itself seems fine and normal to me.
We are tentatively planning a long weekend away (3 nigjts maybe?) for my 30th birthday (baby will be 5 months) and would leave her with my parents. Everyone involved is fine with this idea, but I am totally open to the idea that we may not want to or be ready to leave her when the time comes.
Some people do, and that is fine. I personally am not comfortable leaving a child that young for a week, especially to go on a cruise where it would be hard to get back if needed.
DD was 2 when I first was away for a week, and it was for grad school. Again, some do it earlier (I've been away from both kids for a weekend several times) but for a week I personally want them to be older.
Good point! A cruise would be hard to just up and leave if there is an emergency.
If this all goes down the kid is def. coming with us. There is no way I could relax knowing I couldn't just head out in the middle of the night if I get an emergency phone call. I couldn't imagine waiting until we get to the next port or wherever.
One more option is to fly to the port the ship will be in when the wedding takes place. Some cruise lines will let wedding guests on board for the ceremony/reception, especially if it's at the port of embarcation. So you could maybe do a shorter trip either with or without baby. Again, that is IF they get engaged and IF they plan a cruise wedding.
Post by gretchenindisguise on May 12, 2014 11:04:09 GMT -5
I think this is one of those things that you'll have to decide when you get there. We were gung-ho on baby in the crib first night home. Then while we were in the hospital, we had my parents run out and get us an arms reach co-sleeper.
Lots of plans are made during pregnancy, then you have the kid. Sometimes things stay, sometimes they don't.
I have only left my nearly 6-year-old DD with my ILs for a week at a time twice in her life- once when we had to travel abroad to house-hunt (she was 3.5 at the time) and once when we went on a "babymoon" a couple of months ago. DD was absolutely fine. My MIL, however, was kind of frazzled by the end of each of these weeks and this is not something we would ever ask for regularly. It is A LOT of work to care for a child for 7 days straight, especially for someone who is perhaps older and not necessarily used to being around babies/kids.
It is completely out of the question for me to leave DD with my own parents for a week. They just wouldn't do it. Neither is up for the challenge/responsibility. We don't even leave DD with them for longer than a day at a time.
It is obnoxious to assume that everyone's parents/ILs are up for watching their grandkids, no matter the amount of time, and is particularly laughable when your baby hasn't even arrived yet and you have no idea how helpful your parents/ILs will be to begin with.
Post by phdprocrastinator on May 12, 2014 19:38:15 GMT -5
This is a situation where there are so many factors to consider. I am so, so, so, incredibly jealous of anyone who could even consider dropping their 7-8 month old with the grandparents. Neither set is that terribly ... involved? ... with DD. So, for us, it would have been a huge imposition to ask them, and for DD we would have essentially been leaving her with strangers. Plus the breastfeeding thing.
The one piece of advice I have if you do go on the cruise: Spring for a room with a balcony or separate sitting area. Otherwise, one of you will be stuck in a dark room (completely dark if it's an inside room) with a sleeping child as you can't really leave the room while they're sleeping. One of my friends found herself in this situation, and it was kind of a crummy way to spend a vacation.