Hugs, there are so many emotions with first being pregnant and also with staying at home. I think it was nailed above, when you're not feeling appreciated, every little thing is a slight. And when you are feeling loved, none of it matters. So instead of trying to focus on whether or not your just being hormonal/crazy, it doesn't matter. You're feeling it, your DH undoubtably loves you and wants nothing but to NOT purposefully piss you off, just talk it out with him and give him a detailed blue print on how to do better in the future.
My DH us very literal. I cannot tell you how many times I've started a conversation with "I know I'm being crazy but.... ". Because even if I am crazy, I'm all his! Better that he just learn to make his wife less crazy . And I'm sure your DH wants to be thoughtful/appreciative, he's just sucking at it right now.
It sounds like he's a crappy gift giver in general, he panicked over what to get you, and needs to be reminded how much you do to keep the household running. Time for a chat.
Post by teatimefor2 on May 12, 2014 22:09:06 GMT -5
We had a good talk, he said he wanted me to remember this special time now because before we know it H will be in school and growing so quickly.
Talked about the trip and he admitted, his focus has been all house, etc.
But I am an emotional mess. After we talked, did some last minute packing, I hoped a FB and there was a news article about a mom jumping out of a building holding her 18 month son to save them from a fire and I cried for at least 10 minutes sobbing.
Post by UnderProtest on May 13, 2014 5:41:55 GMT -5
I'm glad you had a decent talk. For what it's worth, I don't think you were overreacting. You can't change gifts being your language any differently than he can change being a crappy gift giver. We are in similar situations and the thoughtlessness of my Mother's Day gifts bothered me and I'm not pregnant.
But I am an emotional mess. After we talked, did some last minute packing, I hoped a FB and there was a news article about a mom jumping out of a building holding her 18 month son to save them from a fire and I cried for at least 10 minutes sobbing.
The only thing in your thread that would annoy me is that you had to plan a trip that he was specifically asked to arrange. That is really irritating.
I also get annoyed when dh tries to DIY because he's not very handy or coordinated...there's a reason why our deck stain peels every year and has to be redone...so I sympathize with you on that.
The photo and card are sweet. Maybe his timing was a bit off, but I think that's a fairly typical sentimental type mothers/fathers day gift. It seems like maybe you're gift giving love languages are a bit off, so maybe more hinting (or straight out directing) next year would be a good idea.
You know, I kind of rolled my eyes at the initial post. But as it happens, my DH also got me a framed picture (of him and DD) as one of my gifts. This is a an unusually sentimental gift from him and I really love that he did that. I also SAH right now.
I realized as I was looking at it today that, had he mentioned displaying it on my work desk, it would have at a minimum ruined the moment. I'd like to think I would have said, 'what do you mean by that?' But I might have been too busy processing the comment to have gotten that it out in the moment.
I would have wanted clarification later if I didn't get it right away.