I just got attacked by a goose.

[malibu]

Stupid thing laid eggs in a shrub right outside the door of our building. There's a pond behind the building that all the geese normally congregate in and lay eggs there every year, but this one had to be special. She hisses at everyone walking out the door. I went out to get a Diet Coke out of my car (since, you know, it's still fucking cold enough here that I can leave cans in the car to stay cold) and the asshole chased me down and bit my leg. Not my fault your stupid ass laid eggs in a spot that's heavily traveled by people, jerk. It actually kind of hurts where she bit me! 

[underwaterrhymes]

This makes me miss 05heel.

Sorry about your goose encounter. They're evil.

[wambam]

Dude, geese are the worst. One came after me and Nano when we were walking a couple years ago. I had to pick up Nano and kick my legs at the goose (I didn't hit it) to get it to leave us alone.

[eddy]

Okay 1 million nest dollar to the person who finds 05heels thread. One of my favorites.

[Deleted]

OMG. Lol.

I'm sorry.

[underwaterrhymes]

May 16, 2014 15:09:25 GMT -5 eddy said:

Okay 1 million nest dollar to the person who finds 05heels thread. One of my favorites.

forums.thenest.com/discussion/4866690/guys-i-was-attacked-by-a-goose-at-work-yesterday

[Deleted]

I remember feeding the geese with a friend in college, then they started chasing us trying to get the bread. We ended up throwing the baguette at them and running away.

Stupid geese.

[sewf]

H and I were both attacked by geese when we were young. Geese are the devil.

[underwaterrhymes]

Incidentally, a goose attack is also the subject of my favorite Hyperbole and a Half post.

hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/01/dinosaur.html

[lilafowler]

Geese are mean fuckers.

Especially those Canadian ones. It's like Canadians are so nice because all their dickishness is allocated to their geese.

[sweetnsour]

Yeah they are dangerous. They go for people's heads here at work.

[annyong]

I was once attacked by a bunch of swans. It was terrifying, and I'm still scared of them (and geese by association). I feel your pain.

[bonquiqui]

Im dying at this and the 05heel thread. Im terrified of birds and geese, but im laughing so hard

[Deleted]

That 05heel post is hands down, the fucking funniest thing in the history of ML

[annyong]

omg, that 05heel post is pure gold.

[fuckyourcouch]

May 16, 2014 15:11:14 GMT -5 underwaterrhymes said:

May 16, 2014 15:09:25 GMT -5 eddy said:

Okay 1 million nest dollar to the person who finds 05heels thread. One of my favorites.

forums.thenest.com/discussion/4866690/guys-i-was-attacked-by-a-goose-at-work-yesterday

I always forget how funny this is in between postings

[underwaterrhymes]

May 16, 2014 15:20:38 GMT -5 fuckyourcouch said:

May 16, 2014 15:11:14 GMT -5 underwaterrhymes said:

forums.thenest.com/discussion/4866690/guys-i-was-attacked-by-a-goose-at-work-yesterday

I always forget how funny this is in between postings

I thought we were close. LOLOLOLOLOL.

[malibu]

May 16, 2014 15:18:15 GMT -5 nicbreeful said:

Aw.. I love geese.

I don't mind them normally. I've actually been giving this one crackers - she's sat on those eggs when it snowed in early April (poor thing was covered in snow, just her beak peeking out) and while it was downpouring for a week. No shelter at all. So I felt bad for her and give her crackers when I leave for the day or go outside. But this was just ridiculous. I wasn't even going toward her or her nest and she chased and bit me. NO MORE CRACKERS FOR YOU, goose! 

[lilac05]

I thought they were so beautiful when I was a kid. Boy, was I stupid!

I hate them now. They have overrun several parks/playgrounds around here.

[alzi]

"I thought we were close" lolololol

[sharknado]

I'm crying, I miss her so much
Someone should berble her

[alzi]

May 16, 2014 15:23:33 GMT -5 underwaterrhymes said:

May 16, 2014 15:20:38 GMT -5 fuckyourcouch said:

I always forget how funny this is in between postings

I thought we were close. LOLOLOLOLOL.

Jinx!

[Deleted]

At least they don't carry rabies. That's about all the positive thoughts I have about geese. And their gross green poop.

[lilafowler]

May 16, 2014 15:24:45 GMT -5 AutumnRose25 said:

There were always geese at one of the campus ponds on my college campus, they are dicks!

I also had an encounter with a swan once, they are not as nice as they look LOL

Swans are assholes, too!

[malibu]

May 16, 2014 15:34:37 GMT -5 @courtneyloves said:

At least they don't carry rabies. That's about all the positive thoughts I have about geese. And their gross green poop.

That's true.

The amount of green crap all over the sidewalk is frightening.

[bonquiqui]

I miss her

[VeryViolet]

When I was really little (maybe 3 or 4) I had this swan try and attack me when I was out crabbing with my dad. It turns out they were an invasive species. A while ago they were talking about getting rid of them and a lot of groups were up in arms, my arms were more by my side. I am still terrified of most birds especially big ones.

[jodinia]

@licia I laughed so hard I snorted!

[aussiecrush]

A goose snatched a bonnet off of my head during Easter pictures when I was about 3. I hate those damn birds.

[Deleted]

I hate geese.