You know the kid is still going to try to stuff his hand down a turtleneck right? Or worse under a turtleneck? I mean, I get what you are saying but she is trying to be discreet not accommodating. Plus yeah, BF.
Did you mean to quote me? We're arguing the same point.
I meant to agree with you. I thought it pulled rumbles bit about the wardrobe choice, which I was countering. Sorry, I post not so good.
Did you mean to quote me? We're arguing the same point.
I meant to agree with you. I thought it pulled rumbles bit about the wardrobe choice, which I was countering. Sorry, I post not so good.
But your counter is weak so that weakens your point. A kid can (and perhaps will) try to get his hand down a turtle neck but won't succeed. It takes effort to carry or wear a kid in a way he could pull your shirt all the way above your boob. Usually, with a 14 month old you have him on your hip so his legs are holding the shirt down. Most carriers will also keep it down. I have to do gymnastics to get my shirt up high enough to nurse in a carrier. Yes, she said it in a bitchy way but that doesn't make her argument for a clothing change meritless.
DS is 14 months old. For about the last 5 months, he's insisted on having his hand down my shirt, somewhere near a nipple, as long as I'm holding him. It does in there the second I pick him up, and settles him immediately. I let it go for awhile -- and I regret that, though I'm not sure that at 8-9 months he would have been able to stop-- but it's becoming awkward. I have to wear v-neck shirts. He's (obviously) indiscriminate, so whenever we are in public and I'm holding him, his hand is on my boob.
I'm getting to the point where I need to nix this, but how? I'm having visions of him with his hand down my shirt at 3. I can't do it.
If it makes a difference in your advice (and please, I'll take any), he is still nursing 2-3x per day. I have no plans to wean him, though I am going away for a couple days in July and if he's showing signs of slowing down prior to my trip, I'll probably let him wean while I'm gone.
Halp!
Why do you "have" to wear v-neck shirts? Why are you giving your kid a "fast pass" for something he shouldn't be in line to do in the first place?
And? You could have stopped this 5 months ago if you just "said no/redirected the hand" like PP are suggesting. That will still work, but it's going to be met with a lot more resistance because you've been encouraging this behavior for so long now by not doing anything to stop it.
Jesus. This shit is never helpful. Thank you so much. Had I known 5 months ago that it would come to this, I would have nipped in the bud then.
I wear v necks because otherwise he stretches out my shirts, or screams.
I appreciate the lovie advice. He has one, nut hasn't used it, because he has had me. I'll go to the fabric store this weekend; that was a great suggestion.
Post by lissaholly on May 20, 2014 19:46:34 GMT -5
Okay then. I had one determined ass kid. She would ( and will) get what she wants or die trying. I will admit though, I am terribly weird about turtlenecks so I don't wear them that often.
My 15 month old has just started doing this and I only bf him for 6 months. Maybe it's just a phase? Luckily he has only done it at home but I take his hand out and have been holding it instead.
Jesus. This shit is never helpful. Thank you so much. Had I known 5 months ago that it would come to this, I would have nipped in the bud then.
I wear v necks because otherwise he stretches out my shirts, or screams.
I appreciate the lovie advice. He has one, nut hasn't used it, because he has had me. I'll go to the fabric store this weekend; that was a great suggestion.
Let's leave rumble aside for a moment. Her tone isn't helping.
You want to change your kid's behavior. You can do this by either meeting him half way and changing his circumstances, or, you can have him do it all himself. Obviously a turtleneck is ridiculous but something other than a v-neck might help.
Jesus. This shit is never helpful. Thank you so much. Had I known 5 months ago that it would come to this, I would have nipped in the bud then.
I wear v necks because otherwise he stretches out my shirts, or screams.
I appreciate the lovie advice. He has one, nut hasn't used it, because he has had me. I'll go to the fabric store this weekend; that was a great suggestion.
Let's leave rumble aside for a moment. Her tone isn't helping.
You want to change your kid's behavior. You can do this by either meeting him half way and changing his circumstances, or, you can have him do it all himself. Obviously a turtleneck is ridiculous but something other than a v-neck might help.
Thank you! I'm not trying to be all Oprah "EVERYBODY GETS A TURTLENECK!!!"
My initial phrasing might not be the best or most PC, but, if you want your kid to stop grabbing at your boobs, then maybe making some wardrobe changes isn't the worst possible suggestion here.
Jesus. This shit is never helpful. Thank you so much. Had I known 5 months ago that it would come to this, I would have nipped in the bud then.
I wear v necks because otherwise he stretches out my shirts, or screams.
I appreciate the lovie advice. He has one, nut hasn't used it, because he has had me. I'll go to the fabric store this weekend; that was a great suggestion.
Let's leave rumble aside for a moment. Her tone isn't helping.
You want to change your kid's behavior. You can do this by either meeting him half way and changing his circumstances, or, you can have him do it all himself. Obviously a turtleneck is ridiculous but something other than a v-neck might help.
Yes. Trust me, I know that I'm enabling this behavior by wearing accessible shirts. I couldn't stand the constant pulling of my shirts and strain on my neck. It didn't bother me, and really, I don't mind now, at home. He's pretty bold, though, and it's getting to be too much in public. I know that it brings him comfort, and I'm actually kind of sad about breaking him of the habit.
Regardless, I understand that avoiding shirts that grant access will be part of the solution.
My issue with rumble's post is the "you could have avoided this" crap. I effing hate that response.
Let's leave rumble aside for a moment. Her tone isn't helping.
You want to change your kid's behavior. You can do this by either meeting him half way and changing his circumstances, or, you can have him do it all himself. Obviously a turtleneck is ridiculous but something other than a v-neck might help.
Thank you! I'm not trying to be all Oprah "EVERYBODY GETS A TURTLENECK!!!"
My initial phrasing might not be the best or most PC, but, if you want your kid to stop grabbing at your boobs, then maybe making some wardrobe changes isn't the worst possible suggestion here.
Wait. You really think I took issue with THAT part of your original response?
Thank you! I'm not trying to be all Oprah "EVERYBODY GETS A TURTLENECK!!!"
My initial phrasing might not be the best or most PC, but, if you want your kid to stop grabbing at your boobs, then maybe making some wardrobe changes isn't the worst possible suggestion here.
Wait. You really think I took issue with THAT part of your original response?
No.
Because you're the only person in this thread that's given me any kind of shit about what I've had to say. Okay, then. o.O
Seriously: tell your kid "no", redirect his hands and stop wearing "easy access" tops. I can promise you that it won't take long for you to break him of this habit once you make it clear to him that you won't actually tolerate this behavior anymore.
Andalsoplus, they both did it in public, and to others. No one ever pressed charges.
Now that I've started this conversation, I'm getting sad about trying to stop it (I'll not be running out for turtlenecks, FYI). I know it brings him comfort, but it's made some other people uncomfortable. And trust, I'm about 98.5% Idontgiveafuck what other people think! and about 1.5% thinking that the hamburger hold he had on my right boob yesterday at the grocery was a little much.
And just to keep rumble's flames coming, I don't wear him anymore because he's 14 months and weighs 35 pounds. I'm granting him access to my boobs for nursing AND comfort simply because it calms him.
I'm going to do what hopecounts suggested and make a bunch of lovies. Then I'll just start the process when I'm home with him this summer, so it won't be like ripping a band aid.
DH's cousin did this when he was a baby. At some point, his mom just started saying "Jack, take your hand off my breast," and then moving it. She did that over and over until he finally stopped. *shrug* I don't think it's that big of a deal and she never seemed super bothered by it.
eta: What I mean by it not being a big deal is that I don't think you ought to feel embarrassed about it. Seems pretty normal to me.